


No hablo alemán

by Xira



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Crack, Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, German National Team, I Don't Even Know, I just had to add some nutella in it, James is freaking out, M/M, Real Madrid CF
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-25 03:04:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 53,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2606138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xira/pseuds/Xira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some of the players of the German NT found the time to spend a week end together, and Toni brings James with them so that he can meet them.</p>
<p> For the young Colombian, it looks like a family reunion, and he wants to be worth of Toni’s love in their eyes. But things appear to be even more complicated than he thought they were going to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone^^,  
> Don't ask where this idea came from, even I don't know. I just had to write it, even though I should be working on my other story.^^'  
> Anyway, I hope you will like it, I sure had fun writing it :)

Saying that James was stressed would be an understatement. He was definitely worse than stressed. In fact, he had been since Toni had told him that he was going to see some of his teamates of the German NT, and that he wanted James to meet them.

He had accepted, of course, because Toni was an amazing boyfriend and that he just couldn’t refuse without hurting him, but in a way it felt a lot like if he was going to meet his lovers’ family, because he was sure, from what Toni had told him, that Die Mannschaft was just one big family.

And he was convinced that he would have to show them that he was worth of Toni’s love, and that he wasn’t going to break his heart. Of course, he loved Toni more than anything else, so he shouldn’t have to really worry, but this kind of fear wasn’t really rational.

They were on their way, Toni sitting next to him, and he wasn’t very good at hiding how happy he was to meet his teamates again. He was glad they had managed to take the time to meet again, despite their heavy schedules. However, it didn’t keep him from noticing that James was crushing his hand in his. He didn’t want James to be afraid like that. He didn’t know why his lover was so frightened by his teamates. 

-Don’t worry so much, James. I’m sure they are going to love you. He assured him, because really, he didn’t see how someone could not love James. It was also the main reason he didn’t waste time to show that he had feelings for him, even if it hadn’t been easy with his poor English, and his even poorer Spanish.

He had been convinced that everyone at the Real Madrid wanted to steal his cute Colombian away from him,- even if, technically, James wasn’t really his back then-and he had gone mad each time he had seen Gareth or Cristiano hugging him while they were celebrating a goal. But chance had been on his side, and now James was his, and he didn’t want to let him go.

James nodded, even though he couldn’t keep himself from stressing. He wasn’t only worried about them not approving of his relationship with Toni, he was also impressed because, after all, they were all world champions. Of course, he knew that it was also Toni’s case. Actually, he was very aware of that, because whispering in Toni’s ear “my world champion” was often all it took him to spend a very, very good night. And to be yelled at by Iker because he was too tired the next morning, but that was another story.

But he remembered how he had lost against Brazil, how he didn’t manage to score enough in time to make Colombia win. The men he was going to meet were the one who had crushed this same Brazilian team, so there was no way he could not be a little anxious.

-Don’t worry, kid, I swear that they don’t bite. Sami told him from the driver seat.

He was the reason why James was only holding Toni’s hand in his, instead of succombing to the tempation of cuddling with him and of burying his face in his neck. The older man had thought that it was useless to take two different cars, since they came from the same place, and had offered to drive them.

Another thing which made James worried was that he knew that he would have to speak English with Toni’s friend, because he was aware of the fact that they would not speak Spanish, and he couldn’t really speak German either. The few words Toni had taught him were the kind you could only tell to your lover.

Toni’s thumb was caressing the back of his hand, drawing invisible circles, and it calmed him down a little. He let his head fall on his lover shoulder, closing his eyes as he tried to regain his composure.

 

He only opened them again when he felt the car stop, and he heard Sami telling them that they had arrived. He yawned, still sleepy, before getting out of the car, followed by Toni. He wished he had more time to wake up, and began to worry again. His lover noticed it and sighed.

Of course, he found really cute that James always wanted to do things right, to please everyone, but sometimes he thought that it wouldn’t hurt him to be a little more confident. But he wasn’t going to push him, knowing that it would only make James withdraw, and he didn’t want that.

Sami barely had the time to put a feet out of the car before a dark haired storm threw itself at him, surprising James and making Toni smile.

They both looked somewhere else to give them some privacy when they began kissing, and it took the two men some minutes to realise that they weren’t alone.

-I’ve missed you so much, Mes...Sami whispered, and James understood that the other man had to be Mesut Ozil, the man who wore the number ten in Real Madrid before him. 

He remembered talking with Sergio and Iker about him, once. They had told him that he was a great player, which, back then, only pressured him more because he wanted to be worth of playing in Real Madrid, and so he had to do his best to reach the same level as the other players.

It took Sami and Mesut a long time to let go of each other, enough for James to realize the chance he had to be able to see his lover every day. He didn’t know how he would manage to live far away from Toni. He hoped they would never have to be apart for too long, because he didn’t know how he would support it.

-You are the first one who arrived, the others are still on their way. I’m happy to see you, Toni. And I am also glad to finally meet you, James. Mesut anounced, smiling.

The “finally” made James ask himself what Toni could have told his teamates about him. He greeted Mesut politely, happy that so far, everything was going well.

-Come inside, breakfast is waiting for us. Mesut told them. He was now holding Sami’s hand and it was obvious that nothing would make him let go. They looked cute together.

James and Toni entered first the house where they were all going to gather, and Mesut and Sami shared a look of pity for the young Colombian, because they knew well that for him, the worse was yet to come. He looked way too innocent, and they were certain that some duo wasn’t going to resist to the tempation of pranking him.

When they sat down to take their breakfast, the number of empty seats made James really realized that he was going to be surrounded by more Germans than he had imagined, and it didn’t really make him feel better. But he shrugged, telling himself that Toni’s friends couldn’t be that bad.

He decided to eat something in order not to worry too much. He reached for the jar of nutella- some chocolate coudn’t hurt in this kind of situation-when he heard Toni say:

-If I were you, I wouldn’t do that.

But he never managed to take it, because a tall, blonde German he hadn’t seen entering the room took it away from him quickly, keeping it jealously in his arms, as if it was something very precious, making James jump on his chair in surprise. Next to him, a smaller man sighed, taking his face in his hand, looking concerned about the other man behaviour.

James looked like a doe in car light, not really understanding what just happened. He looked at Toni, confused, who told him:

-James, this is Manuel Neuer, our goalkeeper and Philipp Lahm, our former captain. Toni introduced them. And he said less loudly, so that only James could hear him:

-And I should have told you earlier, but Manu has an obsession with nutella, so it’s better to stay away from it. He can become a little weird when it comes to it.

James knew them, obviously, after all it was hard not to know the names of the stars of the world cup. However, seeing one of them taking nutella away from you wasn’t the same thing.

-Manuel, how many times do I have to tell you that you just can’t do things like that? It’s rude! Philipp scolded him like if the taller man was just a child, and Manuel looked down, muttering:

-But he was stealing my nutella!

-What about sharing? The other man asked.

-But it would be like...like...like sharing you with someone else! I just can’t! He exclaimed.

Confused, James looked at Toni who shrugged, as if all this was just normal. He remembered that he had been surprised that despite not talking Spanish at all and not being the best at English either, Toni had quickly managed to fit in the strange team that Real Madrid was. 

Of course, he loved the team, it was amazing to be there, but you couldn’t tell that the people who were part of him were normal. Being in the locker room for five minutes with Sergio and Marcelo was enough to understand that.-even though he wasn’t sure he wanted to remember, those had been the longest moments of his life- Now, he saw that if Toni had been able to adapt himself so quickly, it was definitely because it was the same for the German NT, if it wasn’t worse.

However, if there was one thing he was sure of, it was that he wouldn’t be very happy if Toni compared him to a jar of nutella. And he briefly wondered if the former captain wasn’t a little jealous to hear his lover talking like that, but he pushed this thought aside, as an other one made its way in his mind. While Philipp and Manuel were busy arguing about nutella, he asked quietly:

-Toni, don’t tell me that you’re the only one who isn’t dating another German player?

-Well, in fact...He said, a little embarassed, and James understood right away that it was the case, which, in his mind at least, made his situation even worse. In a way, it was just like if he was dating an only child, and so he expected the German team to be more protective of Toni that he had first expected. And he had already done a mistake by trying to take Manuel’s nutella, even though he didn’t know that it belonged to him. It was hard for him not to panic.

And a small part of his mind, the one who wasn’t too busy freaking out, was wondering who was dating who, making pronostics. It wasn’t the most useful things to do, but at least it distracted him.

-Stop thinking so much. Don’t worry, almost all the team had a problem with Manuel and his nutella. And I don’t even talk about the day when Bastian and Lukas hid it on purpose. I’ll tell you the one story one day. He told him, and he heard Mesut and Sami chuckle lightly, which proved that it really had been something funny.

When they concentrated on Manuel and Philipp conversation again, the goalkeeper was trying to make his lover forgive him.

-Come on, Fip, you know that I love you more. I’m even ready to admit that nutella is bad for health. He whimpered, putting the nutella on the table to take the smaller man in his arm, but he didn’t keep his eyes off of James, making sure that he wouldn’t try to take some of it. Despite what he had just said, it was obvious that it wouldn’t stop eating it.

The last thing James wanted was to deal with an angry German, so he stayed away from the nutella as if it was a dangerous nuclear weapon . After some time, Manuel and Philipp stopped hugging, and James thought that he now understood why Toni was used to cuddle with him all the time. 

Well, that wasn’t completely true, because James couldn’t live without hugging him quite often ever, but it was funny to believe that he acted like that because he was part of the German NT.

-Now that we sorted out this issue, maybe you could greet Toni and James a little more politely. Philipp suggested, and it wasn’t hard to see that he was used to have people obeying him. It was clear that he had the authority of a captain, and that it came to him naturally. 

They both shook his hand, and in a way James found it weird that Philipp was smaller than him. It made him respect him even more for being able to lead people like Manuel, who were so much more taller than him.

He could see a threat in the goalkeeper eyes, and he realized that he would probably never be able to eat nutella again without being worried. When they sat again, Toni caressed his hand under the table, trying to make him calm down, but something told him that this was only the beginning of his problems. He wished he was wrong, but things couldn’t be that easy, right?

-So Toni, how is the life at Real Madrid? Philipp asked, trying to engage the conversation on something else that nutella.

-You mean, except from the fact that I have found my amazing boyfriend there? He asked, making James blush furiously. He still didn’t know what Toni saw in him, but he was more than happy to be the lover of the handsome German, even if it meant that he had to go through a meeting with most of the German NT. 

-No, seriously, being there is great, really. I get along with the others, even if I still have a hard time learning spanish. But James helps me with that, so it’s not a huge problem. I’m sure we have more sun that you do. He told Philipp, smiling at James, who didn’t really know what he was supposed to do or say.

Of course, he was glad that Toni was being so kind to him, but talking to Philipp and Manuel made him feel as though he was talking to Toni’s parents, and he wasn’t ready for that. At all.

Each time he wondered why he had accepted to come, he remembered that he did it for Toni, and it gave him the strength to not run away. In fact, he was almost expecting Philipp to ask him if he had considered getting engaged with Toni.That was just how stressed he was. It was hard for him to chase away all the cliché movies provided on this kind of situation.

-By the way, when are the others supposed to arrive? Toni asked.

-Well, they should arrived very soon, except from... 

Philipp didn’t have the time to finish his sentence, because an other player rushed into the room, and James had just the time to recognize Mario Gotze, the man who scored during the final against Argentina and brought victory to Germany, before he exclaimed:

-Is Marco already there?

Well, it looked like the mental bet James had made on those two was actually right.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> sorry for updating so late ^^'   
> I hope you'll like this chapter too and that you'll have fun reading it:)

Explaining to Mario that Marco had called to warn them that he would be two hours late wasn’t something easy to do. Each of Philipp’s words seemed to break the young man’s heart, and James felt bad for him, and he wished he could have helped him, even though he knew there was nothing he could do.

But in a way, it was also strange to see this man, the hero of the final of the world cup, looking so troubled. In a way, it made him looked more human. He knew he should be used to this kind of feeling, as he had to face those kind of things when he entered Real Madrid. Maybe because James still had a hard time believing that he was a great player, and that it wasn’t luck that allowed him to go so far in the world cup and to be a Real Madrid player.

Toni scolded him each time he said things like that, telling him how good he was at football, but it didn’t seem to be enough to make him stop having this kind of thoughts, 

-Come on, it’s only two hours. You’ll be with him soon enough, it’s all that matters, isn’t it?. Philipp tried to cheer him up, but it wasn’t very effective.

James wished he could have done something to help, but how could you help someone you barely knew to feel better, when his own teamates didn’t manage to do it? Philipp was now looking at Manuel, hoping that his boyfriend would have a solution.

But he only made sure that his Nutella was far way for Mario. Worried people used to be tempted by chocoalte, it was a well-known fact. Philipp sighed, understanding what his lover had to be thinking about. Manuel looked at him apologetically, like a puppy who had been caught stealing food.

It was Toni who tried to intervene, but it didn’t really help.

-I’m sorry that Marco isn’t here, but while you are waiting for him, let me present you my boyfriend, James. Toni said, distracting Mario for some minutes.

-Thank you for reminding me that you, you can stay with him while I can’t be with Marco, that’s really kind of you.. Mario grunted.

-You know that’s not what I meant. Toni sighed, but it seemed that as long as Marco wouldn’t be there, his teamate wouldn’t stop frowning. But after all, they all knew how Mario was when he was apart from Marco. And he could understand that being surrounded by happy couples when you couldn’t be with the man you loved had to be hard.

Once again, James was a little confused, because he could see, from the behaviour of the people who surrounded him, that this situation was almost normal for them. And it made him slightly worried, because if all the members of the German team were strange like Manuel, for example, he didn’t know how he would live through this week end. And he really didn’t want to ever know what was “normal” for them.

It looked like Philipp had been right, when he had said that the other members of the team would be there quickly, because the door opened on four new Germans, which didn’t really help to make James feel at ease.

He recognized them-Miroslav Klose, Thomas Müller, Benedikt Höwedes and Mats Hummel. Okay, maybe he had learnt everything he could about the German NT as if he was going to pass some test at school.

Now that he thought about it, this was even worse than a test at school, because if he failed, Toni’s friends would forever have a bad opinion of him, and it just couldn’t happen. He really wanted to make a good impression, because when he saw all the handsome men who were part of the German NT, he seriously wondered why Toni had chosen him, and not one of them.

And to tell the truth, it was a very good thing they were all dating each other, because if it hadn’t been the case, he would have been really jealous each time Toni would have went to a game with his national team. Even though he trusted Toni, he definitely wouldn’t like it.

Toni introduced him officially to the four men, who all greeted him, before sitting down. Mats and Benedikts looked quite discreet, which made him think that maybe there was some normal people in the German NT, who wouldn’t want to kill him because of some nutella.

They often looked at each other lovingly, and even though they surely thought that no one was noticing it, it was as if they were shouting “We are so in love with each other it hurts”. They sat next to each other at the end of the table, and James had the feeling that they wanted to be as far away from the first places, even if he didn’t know why.

Thomas was holding Miroslav’s hand, and it was obvious that he wasn’t going to let him go any time soon. After shaking Mats, Benedikt and Thomas hand, James replied to their greetings politely.

When it came to Miroslav, however, his reaction was quite unexpected.

-Glad to meet you. The Pole simply said.

-Oh, thank you, me too. I mean, it’s an honor for me, to meet the man who broke the world cup scoring record! You were so great back then!

While he kept rambling about how good Miroslav was as a player, his eyes shining, Thomas frowned, and turned to Toni, doing his best to stay calm as he whisperered:

-Please, tell me that you’re boyfriend isn’t trying to seduce mine in front of us, because if he is doing that, he is either stupid, wants to fight with me for some unknown reason or he wants to break with you.

-No, don’t worry, he is just fanboying. Toni sighed, knowing that after that, Thomas would have a hard time to appreciate James, and he could only understand him. It would be quite angered, too, if someone talked like that to James. Hell, he didn’t like to hear James talkking like that to someone else. At all.

-Fanboying? Thomas repeated, confused.

-Yeah, he does that all the time at Real Madrid. Mostly with Cristiano and Gareth. I kept watching him before el Clasico to make sure that he wouldn’t go and tell Messi and Neymar how great they are, because I’m sure he would have done it. He confessed.

-You’re joking, right? Thomas asked with bewilderment.

-I would like to be, but that’s the truth. He can’t help being like this, and trust me, he’s really embarassed afterwards. He just doesn’t realize how it can looks for other people. He’s just too innocent, even if it may be hard to believe Toni finally told Thomas, while James was now enumerating each quality on the field of all the German players, making it just so obvious that he had learnt it all by heart before coming.

-And it doesn’t get on your nerves, to see him being like that with other men? I mean, your Colombian is rather cute, and it could give them ideas. I wouldn’t like it if Miro was acting like this. His friend told him.

-Of course it gets on my nerves. But I can’t lock him in a tower, you know. I don’t want to hurt him. Toni sighed.

-But you could tell him that it hurts you. If he is kind enough for you to love him, then he should understand. Thomas advised him, winking at him.

However, he didn’t know how to make James stop talking, because it looked like his previous nervousness made it impossible for him to stop. So Toni decided to do the only thing he knew that couldn’t fail. He kissed James deeply, and the young Colombian melted into the kiss, forgetting where he was, and that people were watching them.

They heard the faint sound of someone taking a photo, but they didn’t care, and not even Philipp’s impatient “hmm hmmm...” were enough to make them go back to reality. When they finally had not enough air to keep kissing, they parted, Toni saying in his lover’s ear:

-Don’t act like that, it makes me jealous.

-But I like it when you’re jealous. James replied.

That’s when Toni remembered that they weren’t alone, because if it had been the case, he would have dragged James to the nearest bed right away. When James went back to reality too, he blushed furiously and sat down again, sipping on some orange juice, wishing he could become invisible.

Toni gave his teamates a warning look, and so none of them said a word. Philipp was about to ask if they wanted something else to eat to distract them all, but he didn’t have too, because the door opened on Lukas and Bastian, which made them completely forget what had happened. Philipp looked as if he wanted to hit his head against the nearest wall. Manuel wrapped an arm around his shoulder, trying to comfort him.

When he saw them, James immediately understood that they had to be the reason why Benedikt and Mats were sitting at the other end of the table.

Lukas and Bastian were holding a big Colombian flag on which was writing “bienvenido”, they were wearing jerseys of the Colombian NT, as well as huge, yellow sombreros. Their Ipod was playing one of Shakira’s song, and once more, James asked himself why he was here, even though the answer didn’t change. Because of Toni. Because he loved him with all his heart, and would endure anyhting for him.

-Please, someone tell me they didn’t do it. Toni whined, taking his head in his hands, as if he hoped that when he’ll look at them again, Bastian and Lukas would be wearing normal clothes. But he wasn’t that lucky.

-Come one, you should be happy that we decided to do something to celebrate the fact that you finally found a boyfriend, after all this time. Bastian complained.

-Though we will miss all the good times we had trying to find you one. We can’t even tease you that much, because he’s not too bad Lukas sighed.

James raised an eyebrow, curious to know what they had exactly done, but he also blushed at the “not too bad” and Toni explained him:

-It means that just after he left Dortmund, they locked me up in a closet with Mario, hoping that we would get together, and that it would make him stop crying about how he shouldn’t have left Marco. He spent three hours talking of him before Lukas and Bastian decided to free us. And I don’t even talk about the time when they forced me to go to talk with Mats, and I was welcomed by a very jealous Benedikt instead. He explained to him, which didn’t help to reassure James. 

-When I think that I let you become captain of this team. I should have thought about this before retiring. By the way, sombreros are from Mexico, not from Colombia. Philipp sighed, staring at Bastian.

-Well, actually some can be found in Colombia, too. But they are definitely not yellow, and they are not so big, either. James replied shyly, fighting against the urge to just hide in Toni’s arms.

-Don’t worry, I take my job very seriously, as I said I would. Right now, I’m just enjoying my free time, but what happens on the field and during training is serious business. Bastian shrugged.

Philipp didn’t look very convinced by what he said, and so he asked Manuel:

-Is he saying the truth?

-Yes, of course, nothing like that ever happens in the locker room, of course not. He’s almost as great as you were, but no one can surpass you, my Phip. He told his lover.

-You paid him with nutella, didn’t you? He sighed, and the duo looked very disappointed.

-Damn it, how did you guess? It cost us a lot, you can trust me. I don’t have any idea how Manuel manages not to gain weight with all the nutella he can eat. Lukas confessed.

-I know you, I was your captain for years. Retiring from the German NT doesn’t mean that I became senile. I don’t know what you are doing to my team, but if I learn anything, I will not hesitate to talk about it with the coach. Philipp threatened him.

-You’re no fun. Bastian whined.

-I agree with Philipp. The job of a captain is something important. James said, because he had become captain of the Colombian NT recently, and knew just how many responsibilities the job implied.

-Well, it looked like you were right, Bastian, even if we tried to sort it out a long time ago. The cuter the are, the most boring they are as captain. Lukas admitted. The music in the background had changer, but it was still one of Shakira’s song.

Now Philipp wasn’t the only one who felt the need to hit his head against the wall, now James was in the same state. Toni held his hand tightly, as if he wanted to give him courage.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,  
> Here's the chapter where James has to face alone some members of the big bad German NT ;)  
> I hope you'll like it :)

Surprinsingly enough, during the rest of the breakfast, things were almost normal, well, as normal as they could be in the German NT, but maybe it was only because Toni stared at everyone, making them clearly understand that the first one who would bother his lover would also have to deal with him. 

He had one arm wrapped around his waist, and it made James feel more protected. It took James all his will not to lay his head on his lover shoulder, but he wasn’t ready to act so openly while being surrounded with so many people he barely knew

Philipp also didn’t waste time to act like the captain that he once was again. He was still wondering why their coach had chosen to remplace him with Bastian, of all the players of the national team. 

Of course, he admitted that his friend was a great player, no one could deny that, but it wasn’t that hard to figure that with Lukas, he would be up for some mischief. And honestly, he didn’t think that Joachim Löw could be paid with nutella, or with anything else for the matter, so it was a total mistery for him.

He would still need to have a conversation with Manuel to find out exactly what was now happening with his team. And maybe he would also ask him to go against Lukas and Bastian. 

He knew that now that he had learnt the truth, because while the terrible duo could offer Manuel nutella, Philipp could give him nutella AND his body. So he was stronger than them, and determinated to save his team.

Okay, maybe he was overdramatizing, but he also knew what those two were capable of.

Manuel felt how tensed his lover had been by all that, and so he told him quietly:

-Don’t worry so much, Bastian not that bad as a captain. He tried to reassure him, but Philipp couldn’t get over the fact that his lover had, once again, been tempted by Nutella, and didn’t tell him what was happening.

He guessed he would never be able to make him change about this. But even if he would never admit it out loud, he thought that his lover was already perfect as he was, despite his strange obsession-and he was even more obsessed about Philipp, so he could bear it. That, and it would help his rescue plan of the German NT.

-I’m going to go get our suitcases, be kind with James while I’m gone, okay? Toni said, not very willing to let James alone, but he didn’t want to make him carry the luggage-he had the feeling that James was really tired lately, which wasn’t surprising, seeing how much he did on the field, and Toni was a little overprotective and kept him from doing too many things which could tire him when they were together. Despite all of James protest, he never changed his mind about things like this

At this moment, Philipp already knew that all hell was going to break loose, because leaving James alone definitely wasn’t a good idea. But he didn’t say a word, because he was used to the weird things that happened in the German NT, and right now he didn’t have enough strength left to fight about it. This was just the way his team was, and he knew it quite well. 

Most of the guests decided to do the same as Toni, and so only stayed in the room James, Philipp, Manuel and Lukas. For some strange reason, Bastian told his lover to stay here while he took care of their suitcases, which was more than suspicious, as the two were most of the time inseparable.

James didn’t know how he should feel about this. By now, he had understood that keeping his distance with Manuel was surely the better thing to do, and he somehow saw Philipp as the teacher of some kindergarten classroom, trying to calm down the children, and more often than not failing at it.

He still didn’t really know how to feel about Lukas- it counted as well for Bastian- because even if what they had done for him was definitely strange, it could also be seen as a nice gesture to welcome him. he never imagined that dating Toni would make him go through this kind of thing. 

Well, if he had known it, he would have done it anyway, because every moment he spent with him was worth going through all the awkward family reunions in the world. And he thought that Bastian and Lukas meant it well, and so it would be unfair to get mad at them and to have false ideas of them just because of their first encounter.

Manuel used the fact that almost everyone was gone to drag Philipp in another room, trying to make him forgive him for not telling him about all the pranks Lukas and Bastian were doing in the German NT now that he was gone-not that they didn’t do any when Philipp was still there, but they still had some restrain, which was now totally gone. 

In other words, he was actually busy making out with him. Philipp let him do so, enjoying it thoroughly, but also thinking that it would be easier to convince him to spy on Lukas and Bastian if he was nice with him.

Manuel was aware of the fact that letting James alone with Lukas wasn’t really good for the mental health of the boy, but he had wanted to steal his precious nutella, and that wasn’t something he was going to forget easily, so he just stopped thinking about it while he nipped gently at Philipp’s neck.

 

-James, can we talk? Lukas asked, suddenly looking more serious than he had been before.

-Yeah, sure. About what? He answered, not really knowing how he felt about this. For some reason that he couldn’t explain, he immediately wished he had been helping Toni right now instead of talking with Lukas. But he tried to stop worrying for nothing.

-About Toni. You know, to us all, he is family, so we want to be sure that you won’t hurt him. The other man explained, and James nodded, though he didn’t like where this conversation was going. And it was a little difficult to almost be scolded by a man who were still wearing the biggest sombrero he had ever seen in his life.

-I won’t, I promise. I really love him. He assured, hoping that it would be enough. Even if he had expected that he would to have this kind of conversation, he still wasn’t prepared enough for it yet, and it was awkward as hell. But he knew that he couldn’t run away, even if he wanted to do so.

-That’s what you say, but can you promise that you would do anything for him? That you love is enough for that? Lukas asked him, and James had the feeling that he was judging him with his stare. He really wished Toni was here.

-Of course. I swear I’m not playing with him or anything. I really have feelings for Toni. He replied, almost saying that coming here was already the proof that he’d really do anything for Toni. But Lukas was still looking at him with suspicion, and James didn’t like it, because he was sure of his feelings for Toni, and wanted to shout that he really meant a lot to him. That if one day they had to separate, it would break both of their hearts, not only Toni’s.

-I see. Then when do you plan on getting married? Because you can’t be dating him if you’re not serious about it.The older man finally said.

This time James didn’t know what to answer. It looked so much like a movie scene cliché that he just couldn’t believe it. He stared at Lukas with bewilderment, his mouth opened in surprise, not knowing if the other man was joking, or if he really meant it.

Because he hardly saw how he was going to announce to the world that he was going to marry his teamate. If they did, he could be sure that the paparazzi would talk about it until the end of time.

-Lukas, stop playing with him. Mario said, making them notice his presence. He had brought his suitcases to his room as fast as he could, wanting to be back as soon as possible, because he absolutely wanted to be here when Marco would arrive.

-You’re no fun. I like acting like if I was Toni’s mother. It’s not my fault if James is so gullible. I guess I’m going to help Bastian unpack, then. Lukas said, leaving before James could tell him just how he felt about all this.

-Don’t worry, they’re always like that when someone enter the team. Well, you’re not exactly part of the team, but you’re dating Toni, so it’s all the same. Tell yourself that you won’t have to go through all the pranks they do when we have to play a game. Sometimes I think it’s a miracle we managed to win the world cup despite everything they did to us between games. Mario told him, looking more friendly than before, now that he had had some time to go over the fact that he would have to wait before seeing Marco, even though he still hated it.

James thought that it was better if he didn’t know what they did, and told himself that he would never complain again about Sergio and Marcelo. But again, when he thought about it, maybe it was because Iker restrained them, especially Sergio. Maybe he should thank him for that when he’ll go back to Real Madrid.

Well, maybe not, because if he had to be honest, Iker surely was the play who impressed him the most. He was even a little afraid of him, sometimes- even though he mostly shouted at Sergio and Marcelo, and sometimes at Cristiano when he was flirting with Fabio instead of training.

-Thanks for helping me. By the way, I’m sorry for you that Marco isn’t already here. I can see he represents a lot for you. I mean, I saw what you did for him, after you won the final, bringing his jersey with you...James said, desesperately trying to find something he could talk about.

It always made him nervous, being around people he only saw on TV or in newspaper before, because he had the feeling that they all were so much better than him. It reminded him of the first time he came to Real Madrid, about how he had felt by being surrounded by so many stars of football. And even now that he was part of this great team, he still couldn’t shake this feeling a way, and it made everything he said sound just too awkward.

-You don’t have to thank me for anything. I mean, it’s normal that I help, I went through this before you, so I understand what you must be feeling. However, even if Lukas was only joking, when he told you not to hurt Toni, you should keep it in mind anyway. Mario advised him.

-But...James began, but Mario cut him.

-Yes, I know what you’re going to say, and I know that you mean it. That you love him more than anything else, and that you would do everything to make him happy. And anyone who see you together can tell that it’s true. But i’m telling you that because I was just like you, and it didn’t keep me from hurting the man I love. He explained, and James could feel that every of his words hurt Mario as he said them, but that he had to let it out, to make sure that he would take care of Toni, that he would not make the same mistakes as him.

James knew that Mario was younger than him, but the pain he saw in his eyes right now made him look so much older. And if he now had ideas on how to comfort his Real Madrid teamates when they were feeling bad, he had absolutely no idea of what he could do to make Mario feel better.

-I thought that we already talked about it, and that I told you not to torment yourself with this anymore. Someone behind James said, and the boy silently wondered how it was really possible that the door made so little noise when someone entered the room. Because if he had to be honest, it scared him each time. Not that he would admit it, of course.

He just had the time to see a tall, blonde man, before Mario burried himself in his arms, holding him tight. It looked like if he would never let go of him. Once again, it wasn’t hard for James to figure who this man was. Marco looked at Mario with fondness, as if he was the most beautiful thing that existed.

-Sorry, it’s just hard to forget. But you’re right, like always. How are you? Last time we talked, you said you had an injury and I saw what happened during that game, so I was really worried about you. Mario whispered, and it was at this moment that James saw a bandage around Marco’s right ankle.

-I will survive, don’t worry. However, I won’t be playing for a while. He told him.

After he said that, both Mario and James were worrying for him, because they knew how hard it was not to be able to play for your team, because playing was eveything for people like them. And being unable to help your team was the worst thing that could happen.

Marco saw the worries in his lover’s eyes, and so he decided to distract him by talking about something else.

-I guess you’re James Rodriguez, Toni’s boyfriend. He talks a lot about you, you know. Marco said, shaking James hand.

-Well, that’s what I keep hearing since I came here. It’s a pleasure to meet you. James admitted, wondering once again what Toni had said about him. Good things, he was sure of it, but it still made him feel weird to know that he had been talking about him with his teamates. The good kind of weird.

-Now that you’re done with the greetings, could you kiss me, please? I’ve missed you too much, you know. Mario complained, and Marco happily obliged, seizing the smaller man’s lips with his own.

 

In their room, Bastian and Lukas were busy comploting, thinking about everything they could do before the end of the week-end. And of course, with James looking even more naïve and innocent than what they had expected, it wasn’t hard for them to choose their next victim.

-It’s a shame that Mario came here, though, I’m sure James thought that I was serious about that wedding thing. I’m not sure Toni’s going to be happy when he’ll tell him. Lukas said, still laughing after telling Bastian how embarassed James had been.

-But we both now that an angry Toni isn’t going to stop us, right? We have already seen worse. Bastian made him remember.

-Yes, like an angry Joachim Löw. Lukas said, making them both shiver. A few things were capable to frighten them, and their coach was one of them.

-Anyway, what you said before just gave me an idea. Bastian said, in a voice that announced nothing good.

After he told his lover his whole plan, they were both grinning with mischief, and the whole German NT knew that it was better not to be around them in those moments.

-I think I still don’t realise how lucky I am to have you. Lukas said, hugging him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!^^  
> As always, thanks for the comments and kudos, and I'm sorry for being late (again) ^^'  
> This chapter is a little shorter that the others, but I hope you'll still like it :)  
> By the way, you can find me on twitter here: @Noarleen :)

James had decided to give Marco and Mario some privacy, because if he had to be seperated from Toni, he would like to be alone with him when they’d meet again. To him, it already felt horrible when they had to be apart for a few days, and he just couldn’t sleep well if Toni wasn’t next to him. He really admired Marco and Mario for making their relationship work despite the distance.

And so he was on his way to the room he was going to share with Toni, because he needed a break from the German NT. Despite his first worries, he hadn’t imagined how stressful this would be. 

Okay, maybe less stressful than playing in the World Cup, or his first game at Real Madrid, but still. None of the things Toni had told him had prepared him to this.

So he went in the corridor, searching for their room-number 6, he remembered- hoping that he wouldn’t meet Lukas or Manuel while doing so. 

Well, he couldn’t really say that they were that bad; it could have been much worse, if they had thought that Toni was making a mistake by dating him, for example. For now, they seemed to accept him, as long as he stayed away from nutella, which he could do.

But it seemed that fate was in his favour, this time, as he found his way to the room without encountering any difficulty. He opened the door with his key, thinking that knocking would be too formal when there was only his boyfriend in the room.

Toni was almost done unpacking when James entered the room. The young Colombian made so little noise that he didn’t notice him, as he was looking the other way, putting his shirts in the wardrobe and James used it to wrap his arms around his lover’s waist, leaning against him.

-You’re too kind, to do all this alone. I could have helped you. He whispered in Toni’s ear, making his boyfriend shiver.

After he was sure that it was James- Not that he thought that any of his teamates would try to seduce him now that he had a boyfriend, but he could picture Lukas and Bastian doing that kind of prank to embarass him. No in fact, he could imagine them doing any kind of prank- Toni let himself go in his lover’s arms, smiling. He chuckled lightly when he heard James’ words.

-Maybe, but if you had come with me, right now we would be making out, maybe even more, and our suitcases would still be unpacked. He said, turning around.

He cupped James cheek in his hand, before kissing him gently, and suddenly James forgot every problem he had had with the German NT, only focusing on his lover.

-Maybe it wouldn’t have been that bad? And please, from now on stay with me, because I don’t know if you noticed it, but some of your teamates are quite...weird. They’re not mean, don’t get me wrong, but I need time to get used to them. he explained after they parted, hoping that he wouldn’t anger Toni by saying that about this teamates.

-I know, I should have warned you about the Nutella. It’s so obvious for me now that I didn’t even think about it. And for Bastian and Lukas, they aren’t bad persons, they just like to make pranks from time to time. I know it must be hard for you right know, but it was impressive when we arrived at Real Madrid at first too, right? He asked him.

James nodded, because he knew that Toni was right, but it didn’t keep him from having that feeling that he didn’t belong in here yet.

-Don’t worry, I have already noticed, for the pranks. Lukas tried to make me believe that he wanted me to marry you right away. And if it hadn’t been for Mario, I think I would have believed him. He explained, laughing.

-Well, I wouldn’t mind marrying someone as sweet, as handsome and as kind as you. Toni said while caressing James’ cheek, making him blush, but then he also looked down, which made Toni worry.

-James, what’s wrong? He asked, confused.

-Nothing, it’s just...With our careers, something like that will never be possible. I mean, if people knew that we are together, they would judge us. You wouldn’t have to face this if you were with a girl, instead of being with me. You could get married, have a family...James said, not daring to look at Toni while he was letting this out.

Even though he had always found that James looked way too cute when he was being insecure, Toni couldn’t believe that he was feeling bad because of this.

-Will you stop saying stupid things like that? I know it gives me excuses to make you shut up by kissing you, but still. If I wanted to date a girl, I would. But I don’t want a girl, I want you James, can you understand that? And we’re already a family, we have Salomé and Leon, right? And I don’t need the world to know that I love you, I just need you to be sure of it. He confessed, which didn’t help James to stop blushing. At all. He couldn’t believe just how lucky he was, and it didn’t matter that he had already been telling himself this a thousand times.

-Thank you, what you said, it’s beautiful...I-i don’t know what to say...James answered.

-Then say nothing. Toni told him, claiming his lips hungrily, holding him so close that there was no space left between their bodies. James moaned loudly into the kiss, loving how Toni’s lips felt against his own.

-You do like to kiss me to make me shut up, huh? James chuckled happily, leaning into Toni to kiss him again.

-I’m sorry to disturb you, but this is supposed to be a team reunion, so you’d better come back, all of you! Philipp shouted outside, surprising them.

Toni groaned when he recognized the voice of his ex captain, reluctantly putting an end to the kiss, making James whine in protest when the warmth of his body left him.

-Tonight. He whispered, and the promise was enough to keep James from protesting.

They went out of the room, their lips still red and swollen, betraying what they had just been doing. Philipp was in front of the door, waiting for them. 

Despite feeling close to him because they both knew what being captain meant, it didn’t keep James from looking at him with anger, because he definitely would have wanted to have more time alone with Toni.

-I’m sorry, I know that you would like to stay with each other, but if I let everyone do that, Thomas would stay with Miroslav, Lukas with Bastian, Mats with Benedikt, Mesut with Sami and Mario with Marco, and we would never be together. He explained.

Even if he was right, it didn’t keep James from thinking that he would feel way better if he was in bed with Toni right now. And after what had just happened between them, it was sure that without Philipp intervening, it was exactly what would have been happening.

-Come on, Miro, we shouldn’t be listening to him! I’ve been waiting to be with you for so long, I don’t want to spend the week-end listening to Philipp’s boring speeches, Manuel’s ramblings about Nutella and Lukas and Bastian plotting against us all! Thomas protested at the other end of the corridor, much more loudly than James.

When he heard him, Philipp sighed, but the other man didn’t seem to hear him, nor to notice that Toni and James were now in the corridor too, because he went on:

-And I don’t think I’ll be able to take it anymore if James begins to praise you like he did again! I know that he loves Toni, and that he’s not acting like that on purpose, but I don’t think I have enough strength to watch him doing that without telling him to stay away from you! He exclaimed, so loud that it would be a miracle if half of the hotel didn’t hear him.

-I don’t understand why you’re being so jealous, Thomas. You know that you’re the only man for who I have feelings, and it’s not going to change. Miro assured, taking Thomas’ hand in his.

-I am not jealous, I just don’t like it when people are a little too close to you. Thomas shrugged, which made his lover chuckle.

-As you wish. It’s not that bad, because you’re cute when you’re jealous. Miroslav teased him, just before they both saw that they weren’t alone. If he had been in their place, James surely would have been blushing madly, but Miroslav just said:

-Well, it looks like we’re not the only ones that Philipp dragged out of their rooms. By the way, I wondered how you convinced Manuel to do the same. I mean, he doesn’t care as much as you about the whole captain’s duty. 

-What do you think? Philipp asked, sighing.

-Nutella? James suggested, because from what he had seen it was, except from Philipp and from his team, the thing that the goalkeeper cared about the most.

-That’s it. Philipp answered, looking more desperate than usual, and at the same moment, Bastian and Lukas went out of their bedroom, a huge grin on their faces.

-By the way, I need someone to go and buy some nutella, because we’re short on it, and if Manuel discovers it, I’m really going to spend a bad week-end. He sighed

-We’re going to take care of it. We had already planned to go out to do some shopping. You can count on us! Bastian promised.

Philipp looked suspoicious, wondering what they were planning, but he decided that they wouldn’t been trying to prank him while they were away, which was a good thing, really.

-Okay, but try to come back soon enough, and by soon enough, I mean before the end of the week-end. Don’t look at me like that, I know what you’re capable of. Philipp warned them.

They just shrugged and left, which didn’t bother James that much. He then followed Toni, Philipp, Miroslav and Thomas, hoping that things would become more normal. Well, at least he tried to, because he definitely believed that it wasn’t going to happen so soon.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> First of all, Happy Christmas (I'm so glad I managed to finish to write this before it ^^)  
> As always, I hope you'll like this chapter :)

When Toni and James entered the living room, everyone, except of course for Lukas and Bastian, had come back from their room, thanks to Philipp's efforts to gather the whole team in one place. Since it wasn't time to have breakfast anymore, and yet wasn't late enough to eat either, everyone had deserted the table. 

Mario and Marco were cuddling together on the sofa, Mario's head on his boyfriend's shoulder, looking like if nothing could make them more happy than being together. It made James smile to see them like that, and not only because they had been kind to him earlier, but also because he now understood why Mario looked so sad when Marco wasn't around. There was really a special bond between them.

-Where did Lukas and Bastian go? They should be here by now, no? Benedikt asked, because they all knew that when they didn't see the duo, it was that, most of the time, because they were planning something against them-or making out, but one didn't exclude the other.

-They said they had to do some shopping, but they didn't tell me much more. Not that I asked, you know it's not something you should do with them. Philipp shrugged, and using the fact that they weren't here anymore, he asked:

-Now that they're gone, can someone please tell me what's happening in my team since Bastian's became captain? 

Everyone stayed silent, looking at Philipp like if he wanted to kill them. It was obvious that none of them wanted to betray Bastian, because they were too afraid of the consequences.

A few minutes earlier, James would have come to Philipp's help because they were both captains, but since then, he had left him alone with Lukas and had forced him to stop kissing Toni, so he was alone in this.

-I can't believe you're on their side! Philipp exclaimed, exasperated.

-Well, I'm sorry to tell you that, Philipp, but they still are in the German NT, while you are not anymore. We don't have anything to fear from you now, but if they learned that we talked to you, I think it would be impossible to go to the locker room again without being the victim of a prank. Mesut explained, which made Philipp's face turn red in anger.

-Philipp, calm down. Manuel told him, putting a hand on his shoulder, trying to soothe him.

Philipp forced himself to take a deep breath. He had first thought about frightening the players of Bayern to force them tell him the truth, but he had to admit that when if they began to talk of threats, Bastian and Lukas were way better at this than he was, so he'll have to find something else.

-Alright, like it seems that you don't care about me anymore, now that I stopped being part of the team, I think I'll just go back to my own room, and let you enjoy your week-end among players of the German NT. He said, looking like the saddest person on earth.

James wanted to go and comfort him, because even if he was overdoing it a little, Philipp really looked hurt. However, Toni wrapped an arm around his waist, keeping him close. James looked at him questioningly.

\- It's not you he's trying to fool. Don't ruin his plans. He whispered in his ear.

It really surprised James, because he couldn't believe that Philipp was faking his feelings right now. However, it worked, because only minutes later, Manuel was by his side, taking his hand in his.

-Wait, Philipp, I love you! I'm sorry if we hurt you, you know we didn't mean to. You're the best captain this team had ever had, I promise. It's not against you, you know that. Please, tell me you believe me! He begged him.

Toni looked at James, smirking, showing him that he had been anticipating this. James, on his side, thought that it would still take him a long, long time until he got used to the German NT. He also wondered how the hell it was physically possible for Philipp to almost fake tears, because he could swear that his eyes were watery. 

-You say that, but you don't trust me enough to tell me what they're doing with my team. You know I won't tell them a thing, and I don't think that anyone here would go and tell them, I mean, I all you know quite well...He said, but then his eyes got locked on James, who definitely didn't want to get involved in this.

-Maybe that's because James is here that you don't want to talk with me! If it's just about that, then he can just go back to his room while they're speaking. Philipp suggested, not really thinking that the boy could be a spy, but hoping that seeing him saying things he would never say otherwise, and were quite stupid, would make his teammates take pity on him and tell him the truth.

-James is not moving from here, at least not as long as I'll be here. By the way, Manuel, he isn't sad at all, he's just faking it so you will tell him everything he wants to know. Sorry for betraying you, Philipp, I wouldn't have done it, but no one hurts my boyfriend. He said, and James felt him gripping his waist a little more tightly than before.

Manuel's eyes widened, staring at Philipp, who looked like if he just wanted to disappear.

-I'm sorry, Manu, I swear, but I need to save my team from them before it is too late. He said.

-Then you will save it alone! I know we can all be childish here sometimes, but I didn't expect you to put on an act to get informations. I thought you knew you didn't have to do that for me to tell you the truth! Manuel snapped.

-Stop!

James' shout surprised them all, leaving everyone voiceless, because no one expected that the young Colombian would intervene- In fact, most of the time, none of them, except of course for Bastian and Lukas, dared intervene in Manuel and Philipp's business.

-I don't want you to fight because of me, even if it's just because of what Toni said! By the way, both of you are to blame. Philipp shouldn't have tried to fake being sad, but on the other, hand, I think that Manuel would have told him nothing without it or without another trade for Nutella. See, both of you are stupid, so there's no reason for you to be mad at each other. He explained with everyone looking at him, but it didn't stop him. 

Long after he was done talking, all eyes were still on him. He sighed, and said:

-What? I'm the only one here who can be a little bit objective about this whole mess, so I can speak my mind, no? 

-It's not that, it's just...None of us thought that you were able to do that kind of speech. Mario told him.

-Well, you shouldn't have underestimated me. He pouted, and Toni took advantage of it to steal a kiss from him, making him blush, because despite how good it felt, James still wasn't comfortable with doing that in front of the players of the German NT, even if by now, he knew them a little better.

-Sorry, couldn't help it. You're too cute when you look like this. Toni told him.

-And you know that you just made my attempt at looking serious fail miserably? James replied, but it was clear that he wasn't angered at Toni, he just wanted to tease him a little.

-Well, I don't want to hurt you or anything James, but with or without Toni, it's quite hard to take you really seriously, sorry. Sami told him.

-Oh, so you all think that because I'm cute, you shouldn't listen to me? Very well, then. Philipp, I'll tell yo the truth: Bastian and Lukas organize pranks contest during the training sessions. He revealed.

-No! Mesut let out

-Why did you say it? Mats groaned

-Bastian and Lukas are going to make us pay for that! I don't want them to steal all our clothes while we're in the locker room again. Mario whined.

-Thank you, James, though I wished they didn't do this kind of things with my team. Now I will be able to strike back! Philipp exclaimed, while all the other members of the German NT looked like if someone had just died.

-James, I need to have a word with you, please. Toni asked him, and so he followed his boyfriend until they were alone in their room again.

-What did you think you were doing? Now this week-end is going to turn into a living hell, you can trust me, because they will learn it, trust me, they always do, and then we can say goodbye to having a single peaceful moment. Toni sighed, not happy at all.

-Come on, do you think I'm stupid? I thought you knew me better than that. Of course I know what's going to happen, I did it on purpose. You see, I got the feeling that those two had already decided to prank me this week-end, you know, because I am the new guy and stuff. Now the difference is that they're going to prank everyone, so it'll be easier for me to get allies when I'll decide to get back at them. And don't say that the others are going to stay mad at me for long because I told Philipp a small part of the truth. I'll just have to say that I didn't imagine they could be that bad. He explained, smiling.

-You're really a little devil, behind that innocent smile of yours. Toni said, caressing James' cheek, making him lean into his touch.

-Maybe, but I'm yours, he replied, kissing him once more, wanting to push him on the bed.

-Are you trying to seduce me, you wicked being? Toni whispered, and James liked it too much for it to be healthy.

-Maybe you want to find out. He replied, his lips brushing against Toni's neck.

Toni pushed him away gently, leaving his boyfriend frustrated.

-I already said tonight, don't you remember? The others are going to get mad at us if we don't come back, especially after what you just did. He declared.

-Toni, you're not angry at me, right? James asked, suddenly afraid that what he had done wasn't alright with his lover.

Looking at James biting his lip with such fear and hope shining in his eyes only made Toni want to take him in his arms again, but he knew that if he did that, they surely would never join the others again, and that it definitely wouldn't be alright with them.

-Of course I'm not. I don't think I'd ever be able to be angry at you, even if I wanted to. By the way, I think everyone here has wanted one day to get revenge on them. You're idea is not that bad, even if we're in for much trouble, now. He explained.

-Trouble is no problem as long as we're together, right? James said, grinning widely, and Toni didn't know if he wanted to kiss him right away or to hit his head against the nearest wall.

-You know you're going to drive me crazy. Toni sighed.

-Oh, but you like it. And sometimes it's you who drives me crazy, so we're even. James said, pouting again.

-And how do I do that to you? Because the last time I checked, it wasn't me who dared to defy Bastian and Lukas. His lover answered.

-Yes, but it's you who is making me wait until tonight, when you know I don't want to. James complained, biting his lip, this time on purpose.

It took Toni all of his self-control not to comply to his boyfriend's wishes. However, he knew that his teammates definitely wouldn't be happy if they didn't come back.

-Stop being a tease, it's not like if you were really that desperate. Furthermore, devils are supposed to do this kind of things at night, not in the morning. He added, smirking.

-You're no fun. James whined, but he still followed Toni downstairs.

While waiting for them, the others had begun to cook, because it would take a good amount of food to satisfy thirteen hungry Germans and one Colombian boy, but also because it helped them not to think about how Bastian and Lukas would react when they'll learn that Philipp now knew about their prank contests. 

Miroslav and Thomas were taking care of the meat, and had already put it in the oven, while Benedikt and Mats were busy chopping the vegetables. Philipp had insisted that it wasn't because they were on a break that it was an excuse to stop eating healthy-he had stared at Manuel while saying it.

-Do you think it's ready yet? Thomas asked, impatient, his stomach growling.

-No, not yet, you'll have to be a little more patient. Miro chuckled

-Oh wait, I'm going to put some of the sauce over the meat, I heard somewhere that it would make it better! Thomas said, grabbing a spoon, trying to put some of the sauce into it.

Miroslav was going to tell him that it was too early to have sauce in the plate already, but before he could do that, Thomas almost jumped, suddenly holding one of his fingers in his right hand.

-Miro, it hurts! He whined, and he understood quickly enough that Thomas had burnt his finger.

He sighed, because with Thomas, he should have been expecting something like that to happen. The boy was just too reckless.

-Shh, it will be alright. Come here. Miroslav said, leading him to the sink, putting cold water on the burnt finger, which made Thomas hiss, but his lover had a tight grip on his wrist, and he let the cold water pour over the hurt flesh for as long as needed.

-Well, I can see you still need Miroslav to take care of you. I hope you don't get hurt when you'll be playing without him. Mats made fun of him, smiling, and it made them forget the danger James had put them in. Okay, maybe they were overdoing it a little, even if they felt as if they were in Jaws and that Bastian and Lukas were great white sharks that wanted to eat them-or in this case, to prank them.

Miroslav took Thomas with him to the bathroom to take care of his injury, and even though Thomas didn't like being hurt, it was obvious that he enjoyed when his boyfriend looked after him like that. 

-It's done. But Mats is true, I'm beginning to worry about your ability of doing something without me. Miro said after he had put some healing cream and a bandage over Thomas' finger. 

-Yeah, but as long as I can't do things without you, I have an excuse to stay with you. Thomas replied, a huge smile on his face.

-You don't have to have one, you know I want to stay with you. Miroslav said, kissing the back of Thomas hand, making him blush.

-Damn, Miro, you should warn me before saying and doing such romantic things. He said gently.

 

After they came back to the kitchen, Benedikt came to them, and he seemed to be somewhat relieved.

-Bastian and Lukas called, they said they're going to eat outside, so we'll need less food, and more importantly, we have more time left before the pranks begin. He told them.

It made everyone relax a little.

 

Somewhere, in a restaurant, Bastian and Lukas were eating together, having a romantic date, which for them always meant planning more mischief.

-So, did you get something interesting from the microphones we let in the living room? Lukas asked, curious.

-Yes, and I think you will like it. Philipp knows about the prank contest. Bastian explained.

-Just as planned. Who told him? His lover and companion in crime asked, smiling. 

-James. He must have learned it from Toni. Anyway, it gives us an excuse to prank the whole team during this week-end. It's going to be so much fun! Bastian exclaimed.

They high-fived, careful to only look like friends when other people were around.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!^^  
> I hope you'll like this chapter :)

-It smells good, I can see that you did a great job, guys! I can't believe you made so many dishes, but I'm really impatient to taste it! Toni exclaimed when he came back to the living room, holding James hand in his own, gently stroking it with his thumb, knowing how much his lover liked these tiny proofs of love. Toni wanted to show that he was going to support his lover, even if the rest of the team had reasons to be angry at him.

-It's good you enjoy it, because tonight, it's you who will take care of it with Lukas and Bastian. We'll see if you can do better. Miroslav said, and they nodded, because it was only fair that each of them worked. 

However, what they didn't know was that he was suggesting that also because he thought that it was better for Thomas to stay away from the oven. Something told him that it was the only way to prevent his lover from getting hurt because of it.

It was obvious that some of them weren't that happy that James had confessed what Lukas and Bastian were doing, but when they all sat down to eat, Philipp went next to James, showing that he was grateful that he had told him the truth, and that he would support him too.

-I'm sorry if I'm bringing trouble upon you, really. I just wanted to help Philipp, I mean, as we're both captains, I can understand what he's going through. I would hate it if my teammates tried to keep something away from me, I think it's important to be able to trust your captain. And well, I also got a little worked up back then, but I didn't want to do anything bad, I promise. I mean, despite everything you said, Bastian and Lukas can't be that bad, if they're your friends, right? James decared, using his appearance once again to look as gentle, shy and naïve as possible, hoping that he would win the forgiveness of the team.

It made Toni want to laugh, because if he knew that quite often, his lover was really like that, afraid to do something wrong and quite insecure too, he was also aware that James had learned to use it to his advantage, which he was doing right now. But as the protective lover that he was, he also wanted to hold him in his arms and to protect him, even if he knew that James was mostly putting on an act. 

-You don't have to excuse yourself for anything, James. On the contrary, I have to thank you for being so sincere with me when even my teammates and my own lover weren't. He said, looking at Manuel insistently. The taller man was on his right, and he defended himself right away.

-You know I love you, Fips, but I couldn't put the team in danger by telling you the truth, I'm sure you can understand that, you know how Lukas and Bastian are too. I'm sure everyone else acted just like me. See, I'd bet that Thomas didn't even tell Miroslav anything! He affirmed, staring at the younger man with hope.

Thomas was playing with his bandage, wanting to see how his burnt finger looked like by now, which Miroslav had kept him from doing earlier because he didn't went it to get worse, when he heard that someone was talking about him. And so, he didn't have time to find something else to say than the truth, even if he knew that Manuel would surely make him pay for it later. 

-Well, actually I...kinda told him? He confessed, embarassed, while Miroslav had a smirk on his lips, as if he was saying “See, my boyfriend can't hide anything from me because he loves me too much”.

-I think tou'll need another argument, Manuel. Maybe I should find myself a boyfriend outside of my National Team, just like Toni did, since no one here is sincere with me, and I'm always the last to learn what's happening in it! Philipp almost shouted.

-That one is already taken. Toni said matter-of-factly, putting a hand on James shoulder, who leaned into him out of instinct.

Toni knew that right know, he was surely being a bit too possessive, but it didn't change the fact that he couldn't ignore that James and Philipp could have things in common, as they both were captains, and he didn't want to take any risk. And it didn't seem to be a problem for James, on the contrary, he seemed to enjoy it, getting as close to Toni as he could, resting his hand on his thigh.

-I really like it when you're jealous. I'll show you just how much tonight. James whispered in his ear, making Toni completely unable to try to do something to help Philipp and Manuel to get along like he had first planned to do, his mind clouded by thoughts you shouldn't have been having while having a meal with your national team. He could only think of what he would have done if they had been alone, and it didn't help him to stay calm.

He took a quick look at his watch, groaning when he saw just how long he would have to wait, because the night was still far away. He knew that he could only blame himself, because he was the one who had almost forced James to come back here with him. He guessed this was his lover's way to make him pay for it.

-Don't worry, Toni, there's no way I'd let Philipp date your boyfriend. He would steal the age difference jokes away from me and from Miro, I just can't accept that! Thomas stated, hoping that his joke would make Manuel and Philipp calm down and stop to argue. 

Okay, maybe Manuel and Philipp were always arguing about something- Nutella most of the time- but he could see that this time, Philipp looked really hurt, and he didn't want something so stupid to ruin their relationship. And maybe Miro had whispered to him that he should try to do something, too, and he didn't wanto to disappoint him.

-Don't say things like that, Fips, you know that I care about you. I'm sorry, I shoudn't have looked for excuses, it was my fault, but I knew that it would have made you feel bad to learn what was happening in your team, and I didn't want to see you like that. Manuel told him, putting his hand on his shoulder, looking lie a kicked puppy.

-There's worse things than that, you know. You two shouldn't get angry at each other for that, really. This week-end was supposed to be a happy time to see everyone again, not to argue over something stupid. It's not like if the German NT was really in danger or something. Mario interevened.

-Says the one who's only here so he can spend time with Marco. Right now you two would be in bed together if I didn't force you to come here, and you're not the only ones. That's only because I was here that the national team kept being about football and not only love drama. Philipp replied, pouting, but soon enough he was smiling, proof that he had calmed down.

-Well, I wasn't here for long, but after hearing you talking about those pranks, I feel like this team is just like a bunch of kids- which isn't really different from Real Madrid, but it's not the point- and I believe that they would be lost if their parents decided to divorce. You don't want another drama, right? James declared.

They all stared at each other for a minute, before they all began to laugh, even Philipp. James winked at Toni, showing him that he was handling the situation quite well. He was still too close for his lover not to feel too hot, his lips looking so tempting it took him all his mental strength not to kiss him right away, despite the situation not being very appropriate.

-Sometimes I feel like we're going to come out with a complete genealogy for this team. I mean, we already have Philipp and Manuel as the parents, Miroslav as the grand father... Mats chuckled, voicing outloud what the entire team had to be thinking.

-Well, I might as well forgive you, since it looks that if I don't, all of them are trying to find a way to put us back together, which can only means more problem. Philipp offered to Manuel, because he knew that despite how annoying his gooalkeeper could be sometimes, it would be too hard for him to live without Manuel.

-Alright, as long a you don't talk about dating someone else again. You're mine, and I don't want to share you with anyone else. Manuel pouted, but it didn't keep him from embracing Philipp, keeping him close.

-Now that everything have been solved out, can we eat before it's cold? I mean, I wouldn't want to have burnt my finger for nothing. Thomas complained, looking at his plate hungrily, which made Miroslav chuckle at his lover's eagerness.

They began to eat, talking about everything, really enjoying the fact that Bastian and Lukas weren't here yet. Not that they didn't like them, but they didn't have to be afraid of pranks, for now at least.

Until the time of dessert came. Sami and Mesut had made waffles, which ended out being a not so good idea, because when he saw them, Manuel asked:

-Philipp, can you bring some Nutella to put it on the waffles, please? He asked him, and his lover turned very pale, because Manuel had just finished the last jar of Nutella before they began all eating together, and he knew just how terrible Manuel could be when he didn't have his Nutella.

It's at that moment that Lukas and Bastian came back, holding bags full of Nutella jars, to Philipp relievement. When he saw them, Manuel's eyes shone, and he took the bags away from them immediately, not seeing how much the two men tried not to chuckle, which should have warned him that something was wrong. Unluckily for him, Manuel didn't think too much when Nutella was involved.

-Thank you for bringing it. Philipp said, happy that there hadn't been another crisis between him and Manuel. They definitely didn't need it right now.

Manuel put an indecent amount of Nutella on his waffle, so much that it became hard to see the waffle under all the chocolate. He ignored the remarks Philipp made about his health, biting into it hungrily. It was only then that Lukas and Bastian allowed themselves to laugh loudly, holding onto each other.

Manuel began coughing hard, reaching for his glass of water, swallowing it in one drop, but it didn't seem to make him feel any better. Philipp was by his side, worried, a hand on his lover's back.

-Manu, what's wrong? He asked, but his lover was unable to answer him, as he was too busy coughing his lungs out.

James took the jar of Nutella, taking some of it with a spoon and tasting it with the tip of his tongue his face turning a little red, but less than Manuel's. He smiled, understanding what Bastian and Lukas had done.

-Don't worry, Philipp, it's nothing serious. It seems that Bastian and Lukas mixed some red pepper sauce with the Nutella, or something like that. What matters is that it is really, really spicy. And drinking water only made it worse. Manuel should rather eat some bread. The young Colombian advised him, and it didn't take more to have Manuel rushing to the bread, filling his mouth with it to make the awful sensation disappear.

-Too bad the jars in which there's only Nutella were at the end of the bag. Lukas laughed, taking one out, putting some Nutella on one of the waffles and eating it in front of a really angry Manuel who still couldn't stop coughing, despite all the bread he was eating.

-You two are really devils, I shouldn't have let you take care of anything. Philipp complained, but it wasn't enough to make them regret anything, because they found the whole situation way too funny.

-Well, at least it helps Manuel and Philipp to forget that they were angry at each other. Marco pointed out, trying hard not to laugh.

Philipp was indeed still by Manuel's side, caressing his face, trying to find a way to help him to feel better. Once more, he was thankful to James for helping him to deal with all the problems he had within his national team. 

-I'm glad we're making dinner tonight so we'll be able to keep an eye on those two. Otherwise, I don't think I'll be able to eat anything. Toni groaned, happy that he hadn't been the target of Lukas and Bastian prank this time, even if something told him that it wouldn't last.

After some time, Manuel got better, just like James had told him, but Lukas and Bastian would have been already dead if looks could kill.

-You two, don't expect me to find excuses for you ever again! Next time you decide to hide the coach jacket, I'll tell him that it's you! Manuel exclaimed, running after them, but they were faster, and it ended in a scene that looked a lot like the ones in the road runner, and was just as funny.

Philipp and Miro, puzzled, looked at their friends with surprise, and it's finally Philipp who asked:

-They really did that? I mean, I thought that even them had limits. I would have never dared to do something like that, I can't imagine how Joachim reacted.

-Trust me, you really don't want to know. I think we've never been so scared in our life before. Lukas and Bastian even decided to stop their joke and brought the jackett back to his bedroom only one hour after, and we all tried to make him believe that it had been here all along and that he didn't see it because he was working too much. We were lucky that it worked. Benedikt explained, and that memory made all of the team shiver.

-It was so scary that all I wanted to do was to forget it, that's one I didn't talk about it. Thomas explained to Miroslav, who began to understand why Philipp was so worried about the future of his team.

-Someone wants to bet on who Manuel is going to catch first? Mario suggested, laughing at the scene in front of his eyes.

-Well, I have a feeling that he won't catch any of them. I'm sure they've got already something planned to stop him. Marco answered, really happy to be here. 

Not only he was with his boyfriend, but everything that happened within his team also cheered him up, and made him forget that he couldn't play because of his injury. However, he hoped he would not be the target of Lukas and Bastian pranks this time.

They made him run for quite a long time, until they were quite far away from the others, but still in sight. Manuel had almost catch up with them, and was ready to make them eat their corrupted Nutella as a revenche. However, he stopped suddenly when he heard Philipp say:

-Manu, come here right now! 

He hesitated, not wanting to lose his advantage, but not wanting to anger his lover either.

-I can't believe you're doing that, turn around immediately! The other man said again, and this time Manuel decided that it was better to do as he was told. But then, Philipp shouted again:

-Nevermind, go back! 

Manuel was completely confused, as Philipp kept giving him contradictory orders. He was so afraid to anger his lover one more time that he didn't see Lukas and Bastian, hiding behind a door, trying hard not to laugh.

-Damn, recording Philipp's voice during training was really a great idea. Bastian chuckled.

-What do you think is happening to him? James asked, as he watched Manuel walking in every direction like if he was lost.

-I don't know, I'm going to talk to him. Philipp sighed, thinking once again that it was going to be a long, very long week-end.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone ^^  
> As always thanks for all the kudos and comments :)  
> here's a new chapter full of mischief and pranks, I hope you'll enjoy it ;)
> 
> Je suis Charlie

By the time Philipp reached Manuel to see what was wrong with him, Lukas and Bastian were long gone, and they surely wouldn't come back until the goalkeeper calmed down. All the others looked at James insistently, as if they wanted to tell him: “See, that's what they are capable of, you shouldn't have underestimated them”.

-Manuel, what are you doing? Philipp asked, putting a comforting hand on his lover's arm.

-I'm only doing what you asked me too, Fips. He whined, clueless.

From that, it wasn't hard for Philipp to guess that it had surely been Bastian and Lukas' doing to confuse Manuel and give them enough time to run away.

-It wasn't me, Manu. I'm afraid they tricked you again. I'm so sorry, I never should have asked them to buy that Nutella, I should have known something would go wrong. I just, I don't know, hoped that they would be serious for once. Philipp apologised.

He kissed Manuel gently, the spicy taste lingering in his mouth, but it wasn't strong enough anymore to bother him. 

-It's not your fault, Fips, it's only theirs. You don't have to feel responsible, so please don't. Manuel replied, holding him close.

-That's it, they went back to being madly in love with each other. I wonder why we still worry so much about their fighting, it always ends up like that. Thomas laughed.

-Maybe we care about that because if they break up and that Manuel plays badly because of that, more goals will be scored against us during games, which means that Löw will be angry at us way too often. That's why you'd better be careful about it. Miro told him, and the whole team agreed that it was a very, very good reason to make sure that they wouldn't break up any time soon.

-Well, to forget that, what do you think about eating some Nutella, the good kind of course? Philipp offered, even if his conscience was screaming that he shouldn't give Manuel this kind of idea. It was bad for his Philipp's mental and for Manuel's physical health

-I don't think I can.

Wait...what?!

-Manu, are you're sure you're feeling good? You don't have fever or something? Philipp asked, putting his hand on his lover's forehead to check, but Manuel was in good health, nothing seemed to be abnormal.

-It's not that, Fips, it's just that I'm a little disgusted after what happened. I think I'll have to stop Nutella for a while. He explained, leaving everyone speechless.

All of the German NT looked at the spicy Nutella jars as if it was some kind of nuclear weapon, because they had never imagined that one day, Manuel would say that he didn't want to eat Nutella anymore. It was like if Bastian and Lukas had stopped pranking them. It just couldn't happen

-Then what can I do to make you feel better? Philipp asked, running his hands on Manuel's chest soothingly.

His eyes met Philipp's as a grin appeared on his face, leaving a kiss on Philipp's neck, sucking lightly at it, and the ex-captain immediately knew what his lover wanted.

-Something we can do while staying with the team, Manu! It's a group meeting! Philipp protested.

-Yes, and you forced us to come here instead of staying alone with your lover, Philipp, so don't expect us to let you disappear with Manuel. Especially since it's because of you that Lukas and Bastian will now try to get back at us. Mats pointed out, everyone else nodding, especially James who, despite helping Philipp so that his own plan would go smooth, was still a little mad thinking that he had to wait until the evening to have some fun with Toni. 

-Okay, then I have another idea that can be fun. He said, smiling.

-What is it? James said, hoping that it would really be fun, and wouldn't lead to another argument between the German NT players. He missed a little Real Madrid, because at least, when things really began to go crazy like that, Iker would shout and everything would go back to normal in a second.

Here, making Philipp angry seemed to be like the national sport or something. Which, for football players, was kind of ironic, he had to give them that.

-Schweinski hunt! Manuel exclaimed.

-What? I'm sorry, I don't speak German that well, you know. James said looking completely clueless.

All the German players stared at him, silent, before they all began to laugh out loud. Even Toni chuckled a little, even if he tried not to do it, as he didn't want to hurt James.

-What did I say? The young Colombian exclaimed, not very pleased to see so many people making fun of him so openly.

-Toni, If you tell me that he doesn't even know about Kroosmes by now, I think it's going to achieve me. Thomas let out, leaving James even more confused.

-What are you talking about? And why does it sound like Toni's name? James asked, frowning, as Thomas laughed hard and enough to have tears at the corner of his eyes..

-Trust me, James, it's better for your innocence and for your mental health not to know what they're talking about. Toni assured him. 

The younger man pouted, after all he had tried very hard earlier not to look that innocent, but it didn't make Toni change his mind. He also stared at the rest of the team, threatening them silently.

-Okay, I guess that we're going to look for Bastian and Lukas then. I can't let them go away with what they did. Manuel said, and Toni nodded almost imperceptibly, thanking him for distracting James.

They all followed him upstairs, and Thomas couldn't help but go next to Toni, James being a few meters away from him, looking determined not to talk to him until his lover and teammate decided to explain him what Schweinski and Kroosmes actually meant.

-Come on, I don't think that knowing people write about him would shock him so much, he must know just how famous he is. However, maybe you're afraid it would give him ideas. I'm sure you don't want him to know that people ship him with Ronaldo. And with Bale. And with Isco. And with...Thomas teased him.

-Do you really want me to list the number of couples you can find, and in which Miroslav is and you aren't? And I don't care about that, because James is mine, and not theirs anyway, and I want it to stay that way. He declared

-You have a good point there, that's true. But does that mean that you admit that it makes you jealous? You sounded a little too possessive, you know. Seriously, did they try to seduce him too? Come on, I want to know about Real Madrid gossips! Thomas said, laughing.

-Sometimes I wonder why I'm friend with you. Toni groaned.

But they stopped talking when they came in front of Lukas and Bastian's room. 

-Really, that's where you're looking for them first? Knowing Bastian and Lukas, that's the last place where they would hide. Benedikt pointed out, not really convinced by their idea.

-Don't be so sure of that. They might be hiding in there thinking that we'll never come here because we're thinking like you. And look, the door is a little bit opened! They're here, I'm sure of it. Manuel said

-Who wants to go in first? Miroslav said, being intelligent enough to know that this could be a trap. 

Everybody, except Toni and Philipp, looked at James expectingly.

-That's cause I'm the new one here, right? He protested, doing his best puppy face, the one that was usually all it got for his Real Madrid teammates to do what he wanted them to, but that had no effect on the other men, who didn't want to be the target of one of the duo's pranks.

-No, that's because of what you told Philipp, endangering us all. So now, you'll go in there and you will assume what you did. Mario said, pushing him in the room before Toni could try to protect his lover.

The moment he stepped inside, opening the door completely, they heard something falling, and the realized afterwards that it was a bucket full of spicy sauce, and that James was now covered in it from head to toe, coughing and wincing because some got into his mouth. Bastian and Lukas had surely went here even before pranking Manuel, which showed just how well organized they were.

-Well, I think they expected Manuel to come in the room first. Miroslav stated, and the goalkeeper silently thanked him for actually asking who should enter it first.

-James, are you alright? Toni said, rushing to his boyfriend's side, putting a hand on his shoulder, not caring about getting some of the sauce on himself too.

-Next time you tell me you want to spend a week-end with your national team, please make me remember to lock you up in my house in Madrid instead so that we spend it together, alone. James hissed as he struggled to breath, and tried his best to sweep the sauce off of his face, but not really succeeding.

Philipp looked at his friends, finally asking the question that haunted him:

-Please, tell me you're not used to this kind of thing in the national team now that I'm gone! Philipp almost whined, which contrasted with how serious he tried to look.

The silence of his friends didn't help to reassure him.

-We'll let you look for Lukas and Bastian while James and I are going to take a shower. And Philipp, if you say that I can't stay with him because it's a group meeting or something, I'm going to make Manuel eat all the spicy Nutella that's left. Toni threatened him before leading James to their bedroom.

As he walked, sauce fell at his feet, and Toni made himself a mental note to clean it off afterwards, because otherwise everyone would step in it, and the corridor would become a real mess.

When they entered the room, James headed straight to the bathroom, not wanting to left any stain on the bed. It was a good thing that there was a tiles floor, it was going to be more easy to remove the sauce from it.

-Can you help me to take my clothes off, please? It's sticking to my skin, I don't think I can do it alone. James asked him, looking so miserable that it really hurt Toni. This time, Lukas and Bastian had gone too far, and he was well determined to help anyone who would try to get back at them.

-Next time you want me really bad, you can just ask me, instead of covering yourself in spicy sauce so that I undress you. Toni whispered in his ear as he began to take James shirt off.

-It's not funny! Just think about the fact that you can't even kiss me anymore because of...

Just a minute later, Toni's lips was on his, licking at it to ask for entrance, not caring if he was swallowing spicy sauce drops by doing so, keeping James' dirty body close to his, staining his own clothes, but doing anything to prove that he cared. 

And he had to see the bright side of life; with what had happened, James seemed to have forgotten that he wanted to know what Schweinski and Kroosmes meant, which spared Toni from going through embarrassing moments.

However, their situations became quite embarrassing when Toni began coughing through the kiss, involuntarily biting on James' lip, but luckily not hard enough to hurt the other man. He stepped away, waiting for his coughing fist to end.

-It was really romantic of you Toni, and I liked you doing it, but I don't think it was really a good idea. And now you'll have to shower too. James said, patting his back, hoping it would help his lover to feel better. 

After Toni managed to breath normally again, he faced James, smiling at him through some last coughs.

-So I guess that my technique to take a shower with my hot boyfriend has just been discovered. He laughed, taking his own shirt off before taking James in his arms, having a hard time reminding himself that he couldn't kiss him or lick at his neck without eating some of that evil sauce.

-So you decided to stop being a tease? Too bad for you, now it's my turn to want to wait until tonight. James exclaimed, taking his last pieces of clothing off, sticking his tongue out at Toni before entering the shower alone. 

Toni groaned at how childish his lover was, getting rid of his own clothes as fast as he could to join him right away. When he entered the shower, James had his eyes closed as he let the hot water run on his naked body, the sauce leaving with it. For the first time, Toni told himself that trying to be reasonable and deciding not to do anything to James for a whole day had been a very, very bad idea.

-I guess you're not done harassing me. James teased him, but the smile on his face told Toni that he was only joking.

-Or maybe I just want to wash myself to stop being covered in spicy sauce because I just had to hug some beautiful Colombian player. You choose. Toni replied.

-It's not by flattering me that you're going to get into my pants before tonight. James answered him, laughing, as the water cleaned both of their bodies.

-But it's not flattery, since you are really beautiful, you're not wearing any pants right now anyway, so...Toni said, getting nearer to James, putting his hand on the Colombian's hip.

It's at that precise moment that someone knocked hard on the door, making him groan as James chuckled. Fate had to be against him or something.

-I still need to wash my hair, but you're clean, so take a towel and go see who it is. James told him, leaving a soft, teasing peck on his lips. 

Toni did as James wanted, putting a towel around his waist and opening the door only to find Thomas in front of him.

-What do you want? Did you find Lukas and Bastian? He said, not trying to hide the fact that he was annoyed.

-We did, but things didn't turn out like we had planned. Philipp and Manuel accepted not to do anything against them. His teammate explained.

-Are you kidding me? After what they did to James and to Manuel? I can't believe it! Toni almost shouted, not understanding their reaction. He was well determined to get his revenge on them, it was just a matter of time now.

-They didn't really have a choice. You're going to understand why.

And from what Thomas showed him on his phone, Toni understood it quite well. They had pictures of Philipp and Manuel in all kinds of embarrassing situation, all caused by the duo's pranks of course.

-It must be on yours, too. They sent it to everyone in the German NT. You know, to remind us that they've got a lot of things they can use against us. I don't think it's even worth fighting with them. Thomas sighed.

-Oh, I'm not so sure. Not when we have James with us. They've got nothing against him, remember? Toni said. This time, war was declared.

 

Lukas and Bastian had had time to put more micros in the corridors- not in the rooms though, they'll need to change that, and Toni last sentence only made them laugh. Hard.

Because they were determined to make that change, and being their mischievous selves, it surely wasn't going to be that hard.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!^^  
> I'm repeating myself, but thanks for reading, for the kudos, comments, etc...  
> I hope you'll like this chapter, it did get a little more fluffy than I wanted it to ^^'

When Toni closed the door, determined to spend some time with James before going back with his friends, James was done showering. 

He just came back from the bathroom, his hair now wet and sticking to his forehead, a towel around his waist, and Toni couldn't keep himself from lingering at his body, even if he had seen him naked a few minutes later. He would never get bored of that sight, just like he would never get bored telling himself that this beautiful and clever boy was now his.

-You'd better stop drooling, you perverted German! It doesn't suit you that well, you don't look intelligent at all. James teased him, an insolent smile on his face.

-And how I am supposed to do that when you're walking around almost naked? He purred, getting nearer to James, trapping him against a wall, putting his hands on the small of his back. He could feel the other man's breath on his cheeks, and it only made him want to kiss his lovely lips.

-You are too, so you can't complain about that. What did Thomas tell you anyway? I saw him before you closed the door. James explained, and it took a second for Toni to react, his eyes focusing on the path a drop of water was taking down James' body.

He was seriously envisaging taking his towel off, and as an excuse pretext that it was to let that little drop run freely all the way to his legs. Okay, it was a lame excuse, but now it was him who was desperate to touch James.

-Well, it looks like if Bastian and Lukas are blackmailing all the members of the team, even Manuel and Philipp decided to stop chasing them. He explained.

-And what about you? What are you going to do? James asked, his big brown eyes locked on Toni, making him think that he'd rather give him the answer he was expecting. 

-Me, I'm going to get back at them for embarrassing my handsome boyfriend, until they understand that they'd better not mess with us. If you're up for it, of course. He told him, while sucking on his neck, smiling as he heard soft moans leaving James mouth.

-What do you think? Of course I want to take revenge on them. But it's going to be a little difficult if you keep perturbing me like that. We've got to be clever than them, but right now I don't think that our brains are working well. Not with your lips on my neck. James pointed out, and Toni stepped away from him, pouting.

-That's not fun. I don't know what you'll do about them, but I can see that you're already taking revenge on me for the whole tonight thing, aren't you? Toni complained.

-Instead of acting like a spoiled child, get dressed before I change my mind. We really need to have a good plan if we want to win against them.

Toni executed his order, taking some clothes out of the wardrobe, but he got dressed in the middle of the room, trying to tempt James. He took a glance at his lover that was licking his lips, enjoying the show, and it made him smirk.

James saw it and raised an eyebrow, chuckling:

-Don't smile like that, if you think that a strip tease is all it will take you for me to change my mind, then you're wrong. You'd better be faster than that, if we stay in here for too long it might look suspicious. You know, Bastian and Lukas may assume that we're planning something against them.

In the way James urged him, Toni could see that his boyfriend enjoyed thoroughly the idea of pranking his two teammates. Maybe the boy was definitely more wicked than he had first believed.

-Yeah, or they may think that we're fucking each other's brains out. Personally, I would like that option, too. And I also think that you need to get punished for being such a tease. Toni said as he finished dressing himself.

He got near James, who didn't seem ready to accept his proposition, and began to tickle him on his chest and belly, taking advantage of the fact that his lover was still half naked. He pushed him on the bed, getting on top of him, until James was out of breath from laughing. He then stopped, his hands on each side of James' head.

-What do you think about that? He asked him, his voice husky against James' ear.

-I think that you're not only a perverted German who has a dirty mouth, you're also a stubborn one. But you should know that I'm better at stubbornness than you, and we're are not going to do anything involving getting naked in a bed before tonight, because right now, we're working on a plan. Can you understand that, or do I have to take a German dictionary so that you will understand it better? James said, using one of his best puppy faces- that was how he got what he wanted most of the time.

Toni sighed, rolling on the other side of the bed, trying to ignore just how much he wanted to stay above James. He still told himself that maybe if he found a plan quickly enough, him and James would still have time to do...other things. He thought for a minute, but nothing came to his mind.

-Okay, let's say that each time you've got an idea, I'll let you kiss me, and the better it will be, the longer the kiss will last. James suggested, and it made Toni's eyes shine with enthusiasm. 

-Well, that is motivating! Don't worry, I'm going to find so many ideas that you sweet lips are going to get sore. Toni warned him.

-I knew you would like that. James said, grinning widely.

-Oh, I've already got one! Toni exclaimed, staring at James' red lips, hunger in his eyes.

 

Everyone had noticed James and Toni absence, and it was obvious that if they had only been taking a shower, they would already be there with them. Philipp had given up on trying to force anyone to come with the team. 

Actually, he was too busy trying to find out how he could make Lukas and Bastian pay for what they had done, despite their blackmailing. He just couldn't envisage giving up, not after they traumatized Manuel so much that he didn't want to hear anyone talking about Nutella anymore. He knew that meant a lot for his lover, and so avenging him had become Philipp's priority.. 

Of course, the ambiance was now a little tense, despite Lukas and Bastian telling them that it was just a joke and that they shouldn't take it so bad. Philipp really wanted to say that he didn't really like this kind of jokes, but he could feel Manuel's hand caressing his thigh under the table to calm him down.

Philipp smiled gently at his lover, wishing he could still play with him during international duty. Maybe he wouldn't have retired if he had taken the time to think about what Lukas and Bastian could do with his team in his absence.

-We're going to take a break in our rooms. See you later. Lukas said, and this time Philipp let them do so without protesting. Maybe it was better if they left, like that he would have a little more time to calm down. Or to get ready for vengeance. Yeah, that surely sounded more realistic. 

 

Lukas and Bastian had left because they believed, thanks to what they had heard earlier, that Toni and James were busy planning things against them, and the only way to prevent it from happening was to know what exactly they wanted to do.

But this time, they weren't so lucky, because they didn't manage to break into the rooms to put some microphones in it, no matter for how long they had tried to pick the locks.- Yes, that was how you spent time when you were famous footballers who had a love for pranks.

So now, they had to do it in the old school ways. Which meant that they silently went in front of the door of James and Toni's rooms, and put a glass against it,- they had taken it with them when they left the table with no one noticing- Lukas placing his ear next to it, trying to hear something. At the same time, Bastian looked through the lock. 

However, the sounds Lukas heard had nothing to do with planning something against them. What Bastian saw confirmed what he was thinking.

-It looks like we overestimated them. They are not trying to prank us, they're making out on their bed. I think that it's going to take a long time until they're done, it surely isn't worth staying here. To be honest, I don't think they'll be a threat this evening, we should only look out for tomorrow. Let's go back to see Philipp until he gets all captain-y again and decides he wants us to act like a united team, blah blah blah... He said.

Lukas agreed, following him, upset that their spying hadn't been successful. He didn't like it when they lost control over a situation, because he knew that if his teammates got a chance to get back at them for their pranks, it would surely be something ten times worse than what they had done to them.

Just the thought of that made him shiver, but he had so much fun making jokes with Bastian that he wasn't going to stop doing it any time soon.

 

Bastian and Lukas had just left when Toni and James stopped kissing, their lips completely swollen. Seeing how it was going, Toni's prediction of their lips getting sore weren't too far from becoming true.

-Oh, you really liked that idea, didn't you? I think it's the first time you kissed me for so long since we began that game. He teased James, nibbling at his ear gently. 

-Well, it looks like you can be clever when you want to. Maybe you have thought of something else? James answered, caressing his cheek.

-Something that doesn't involve what I'm doing to do to you tonight, I guess? Toni said, trying to steal a kiss from James, but he founded himself kissing the palm of James' hand instead.

-I said a kiss for an idea. No cheating. James scolded him.

-You're really greedy, you know that? An idea, an idea...I don't think we can make them eat anything weird, they would expect it after what they did to Manuel. Oh, I think I've got another idea. Like, a long term prank, but for it to work, we'd need to break into their room without them noticing. And we're going to need the help of the others too, well not right now, but afterwards. Do you think that's possible? Toni asked his lover, who looked really curious to discover what he had in mind.

-Your crazy team managed to win the world cup, so I think that nothing is impossible. What's that idea anyway? He wanted to know.

-You're mean, we're a great team, so it's only normal that we won. You're only saying that because you're jealous. Though I wished my team would have been playing against yours in the semi-finals instead of Brazil. Toni said, which confused James. Why was Toni suddenly talking about that?

-Why? I mean, you did win against Brazil 7-1, everyone talked about it for weeks, and Marcelo still looks weirdly at you sometimes because of it. I don't think you could have done a better game against Colombia. James pointed out, raising an eyebrow, trying to understand what was Toni's point- In Toni's opinion, he looked adorable like that.

-Yes, but if we had played against Colombia instead, after we won, because I'm sure we would have won, I could have comforted you the David Luiz did, and we would have been dating a few months earlier. Toni explained, proud of his idea.

-And what makes you so sure that you would have won against us? I'm sure my team would have been better than yours. But wait...Don't tell me that you're jealous of David! James exclaimed, laughing.

-Maybe a little...I mean, there are pictures of you two hugging shirtless all other the internet. He pouted. Okay, and maybe the fics too, just like Thomas had pointed out earlier, but he definitely wasn't going to talk of that to James.

-Oh, that's cute. But you should know you're the only one that I want. David's just a friend. But let's talk about more serious matters. What's that long term vengeance idea? I hope it's as good as the others. James warned him.

Toni leaned into James, whispering it into his ear, the boy giggling when he heard it.

-I didn't know you could be so creative, Toni. That deserves another kiss, come here. He said, grabbing his shirt, pulling him closer until their lips met again, tongue dancing against each other, making both of them feel dizzy. This time, James let Toni kiss him until they both were out of breath.

-We should bet back with the rest of your team, we have enough ideas now. James said, smiling wickedly as he stood up and began getting dressed to- Toni didn't let him approach a single piece of clothe since he went out of the shower. He had said that seeing James wearing only a towel around his waist helped him to be more motivated. It had made his lover laugh and blush at the same time.

-Oh, but I liked that game. Toni complained. He had thought that he would stay alone with James for a longer time- truth be told, he had hoped he could convince his lover not to go downstairs until it was time for them to begin to cook the dinner.

-I know you did, but now is the time for revenge. James said.

-Okay, but first there's something I need to do. He said, messing with James' hair. His lover tried to get away, but Toni kept him in place.

-Hey! What are you doing that? It's mean! James whined, trying to make his hair look better again, in vain.

-Well, since I'm so mean, why don't you do the same to me? Toni said, smirking.

-Thanks for the idea! James said, doing exactly the same to Toni who, to his surprise, didn't even try to stop him.

-Now, we're ready! His lover declared, confusing James.

-What do you mean, we're ready? James asked. By the way his hair now looked, he thought on the contrary that he would need to spend some time fixing it in the bathroom before being actually ready.

-Well, with your lips swollen and your hair like that, no one will doubt that I've only been doing dirty things to you, and they won't suspect a thing about us preparing something. Try to blush a little when we'll come back, and it'll be perfect. Toni assured him.

-I don't think I'll need to pretend too much for that. I mean, you did try to do dirty things to me. So ready to face your crazy team again? James replied as he opened the door.

 

James did blush when he saw everyone's stare on him, and he bit his lip, knowing quite well what they were thinking. That Toni and him couldn't even spend an entire day without going at it. He thought about everything he had planned with Toni to make himself calm down.

-Is that a Colombian thing to have showers that last so long? Thomas asked sneakily, making James' cheek turn into crimson.

-Don't blame the kid, I'm sure it took him a long time to clean himself, there was a lot of sauce in this bucket after all. Bastian intervened, smiling knowingly at Lukas.

-You're just jealous that your boyfriends aren't as great as mine. Toni replied to make them shut up, which made Miroslav and Lukas frown.

-You know, I didn't think that this week-end would be so tiring, coming back to Madrid will almost seem like holidays. I mean, back there, we all know that Toni and James likes to take long showers together and it doesn't shock anyone. Sami let out, making Mesut chuckle and all the others go silent.

-What? Since everything is already going completely crazy, I don't see why I wouldn't have the right to do that, to. He said again.

-You know, Manuel stopped loving Nutella, so I think nothing can really surprise me after that. Philipp sighed.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone,  
> I hope you'll like this chapter and that you'll still have fun.  
> It's mostly James' scheduling things, real fun will happen in the next one ;)

It had been a long time that James had come back with Toni now, and he was getting tired of Thomas' witty remarks, Lukas and Bastian not helping either. He only calmed himself thinking about all that Toni and him had planned. It definitely was a soothing memory. 

He just had to wait a little; trying to prank Lukas and Bastian right after coming back would be too risky, or at least he assumed so. Okay, and maybe Toni's hand caressing his thigh discreetly under the table helped him not to get angry, too, though it made his heart beat faster than it should.

-Can you please stop bothering James before I really get mad at you? Toni asked, looking very protective of the young Colombian, which made James smile. He wondered when Toni would finally understand that he was big enough to protect himself. Probably never, but that was fine with him. 

-You two , you'd better calm down, I don't want a fight while we're on vacations, do you understand? And if you can't, then you can just go outside to play football until you're sociable again. Philipp warned them, his patience very, very thin.

-Yes, mum. Thomas and Toni replied ironically and at the exactly same time, which made everyone except Philipp himself laugh, some of them choking on what they were drinking. The ex-captain's face had turned red, while James was quite happy that the whole German NT had found another victim, although he felt bad for Philipp. 

-Oh, so you think everyone can make fun of me without being afraid of the consequences? Philipp hissed, and everyone stopped laughing, seeing the storm coming.

-Well, actually...Lukas began, and it was too much for the other not to chuckle again, causing Philipp's rage.

-Very well, then. If it's like that, then I'm really going to do it. Thomas, Toni, you are going to go outside, and you're not coming back until I say so. And if you dare to say that you don't care because I'm not captain anymore, I'll post all the embarrassing pictures I have of you on the internet! He almost shouted, this time making everyone shut up for good. 

-You've got that kind of pictures of them? And of us too? Marco asked, shocked, not only surprised that Philipp was doing that kind of things, because it was obviously more like Bastian and Lukas to do that, but also fearing that Philipp had compromising photos of him and Mario.

-Of course I have some. I kept it to motivate people who didn't want to train hard enough during the world cup. Why did you think we won? Too bad I never managed to have any of Lukas or Bastian. He explained, while Mario nodded to what his former captain was saying, and Marco wondered with what kind of picture exactly Philipp had blackmailed him.

-Yes, we're too intelligent for that! Bastian explained, and him and Lukas took it as an excuse to high five, which didn't please the people in the room who had been victims of their pranks. Just wait, James told himself, just wait.

Philipp gritted his teeth but didn't reply, knowing that trying to face the duo was hopeless. If he really wanted to defeat them, he needed to be slyer than that. And for now, he was going to take his anger out on Thomas and Toni. Even if it was unfair.

-Don't make me repeat myself. You'd better leave the room this instant, if you don't want to get into trouble! Philipp said again.

They didn't know Philipp could actually be so frightening, and Manuel looked at them apologetically, knowing what it was to face his lover's fits of anger, even if, hopefully, they weren't that common, and mostly happened when he was near Bastian, Lukas, or both.

-But...! Thomas tried to protest, but Philipp's stare made him understand that it wasn't a good idea. So he just headed to the door, looking down, followed by Toni who was in a similar state. James and Miroslav immediately stood up, ready to go after them.

-Oh no, you two, you are going to stay here. This is supposed to be a punishment for them, not an occasion to make out with their boyfriends in the yard. They will go out alone. Philipp stated. Miroslav sat down again, sighing, knowing that it was better to wait until Philipp was calm again.

However, James didn't think that way, and he went to Toni's side, staring defiantly at Philipp, intertwining his finger's with Toni's.

-I'm not going to do everything you tell me like an obedient puppy when I'm not even part of that team. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to let my boyfriend alone just because he upset you. He warned him.

Truth be told, a part of him was doing that to protect his boyfriend and to show him that he supported him, but he was also acting like that because he didn't want to be without Toni with Lukas and Bastian around, even if now, he knew that he had to expect from them. He didn't want another conversation about his wedding with Toni or anything else like that.

Philipp wanted to say something, but before he could do it, James pulled at Toni's hand, leading him outside, Thomas going after them, not wanting to have those pictures of him ending up on the internet, telling Miroslav that he could stay inside. 

-Did James really do that? Lukas asked, looking impressed.

-Oh yes he did! If that kid can confront Philipp like that, then maybe we should take him as our successor rather than pranking him. It's a shame that he is not part of our national team. Bastian pointed out, finding James' reaction priceless.

Philipp wasn't really sharing their happiness. Everyone expected him to get angry again. But instead, when he looked up at them, they could see that his eyes were filled with tears, which immediately made Manuel worry.

-So that's what it came to, in the end. No one respects me anymore, not even someone I just met. Things like that would have never happened before I gave up on my captaincy. You all think that I'm worthless now. He let out, before he stood up to, ready to run away to his room. But before he could so so, Manuel caught up with him, trapping him in his arms.

-Philipp, please stop saying stupid things like that. You're important for us all, and I'm sure that deep down, you know it. James is just stressed right now because of what happened to him, that and the fact that he just met us today. You can't really blame him, I'm sure he didn't want to hurt you. That's understandable, no? He whispered in his ear, caressing his face.

-You really think I'm still important for the team? Philipp asked, his voice trembling. Manuel briefly wondered if Philipp was still acting like that to get something from him like he did earlier, or if he really felt bad, but he decided to assume that it was the latest. No matter what, the last thing he wanted to do was to hurt his lover.

-I think it would be better if you took some time alone with Philipp. Make him understand that we will never forget how great he was as a captain, and that we will always respect him. Well, for Bastian and Lukas, it's true that they pranked him a lot, and are still doing it, but they always listened to him on the field. Make him see that. Miroslav advised him, Philipp not being able to hear him, his face buried in Manuel's chest.

Manuel nodded, knowing that it was always better to listen to Miroslav's advice. He wrapped an arm around his excaptain and lover's shoulders, leading him to their bedroom. In a way, it was funny that it was Philipp, who wanted them to act as a group so badly, who was finally leaving with his boyfriend.

As they disappeared from their sight, all their teammates who were staying suddenly realized that the main targets of Lukas and Bastian had just left, which meant that now, they were surely going to choose another victim. And their shark-like smiles didn't help them to feel any safer, as they were looking for the easiest victim.

 

-For how long do you think we will have to stay outside? Thomas asked, already thinking that he would have to watch Toni and James making out until Philipp took pity of him.

-I don't really now. I'll try to come back in ten or fifteen minutes. Well, if James doesn't convince me to stay out for longer. Toni shrugged, one arm wrapped around James' waist already. 

James punched him lightly, not wanting him to give Thomas another reason to make sneaky remarks. Honestly, despite Toni's suggestion being quite attractive, he felt ill-at-ease at the idea of making out with Toni with Thomas being not too far away and well aware of what they were doing. 

And the fact that they were outside didn't help him to be confident about that either. Maybe he was being too paranoiac about it, but he always feared that paparazzi might find out about his relationship with Toni. He would never forgive himself if his boyfriend's career was ruined because of him.

-I'm sorry, but I'm not going to let you two act like little lovebirds while I'm getting bored out of my mind. Thomas protested.

-Actually, and I'm sorry if it is going to deceive you, Toni, but I agree with Thomas. I think we could use this time to do something more productive, like getting ready to fight Lukas and Bastian. Well, if Thomas wants to help us, of course. James announced.

Thomas stared at them, wondering if they were realized what was actually going on. It was obvious that James wasn't used to the German NT.

-Are you crazy? I know Toni thinks you can do it because they've got nothing against you, but I'm not getting involved with this. I'm sure Miroslav would tell me to be reasonable and to stay away from this mess! Thomas said, determined not to change his mind.

-Oh, so I was right. Too bad then. James let out, disinteresting himself from Thomas and beginning to leave little kisses on Toni's cheeks, as if the other man's presence had suddenly stopped bothering him.

-What do you mean, you were right? Thomas asked, confused, not understanding what was the message James wanted him to understand.

-That you're only Miroslav's cute little puppy, doing everything he tells you to. Guess he thinks that you're not mature enough to take decisions on your own. Don't worry, we will let you congratulate us when we will have beaten Lukas and Bastian while you will still be hiding like an obedient dog. James said, his tone defying, and Toni didn't understand why suddenly, his lover was being so bitchy. This was just so unlike his James to try to hurt other people.

-Don't you dare to talk of Miroslav like that, he would never treat me that way. You don't know him, so shut up! He said, pushing James, and Toni immediately went between James, not wanting to let them get hurt in a stupid fight. But when his eyes' met James', he finally understood what was the boy's goal.

-James, please, don't tell me that you tried to convince Thomas to help us by making him feel the need to prove that he could do something without Miroslav! He declared, looking at his lover suspiciously.

James' cheeks turned a little red, showing that he was indeed guilty, but he could see in his eyes that he was also upset that Toni had revealed his plan in front of Thomas. He sighed, not wanting to face a pouting James again.

-Maybe. He let out, sulking, not happy that Toni had said that in front of Thomas.

-Damn it, Toni, he's really less innocent than he looks! Thomas exclaimed, laughing now that he knew that everything James had told him had just been part of an act.

-Shut up! James growled, not pleased at all, using his sad puppy face.

-James, please, don't look at me like that! Toni said, knowing how stubborn his lover could be in this kind of situation.

He obtained no response, but still, he had an idea of how to make James forgive him, even if he knew that it wouldn't really be easy. He looked at Thomas insistently, until his teammate finally noticed it.

-Don't look at me like that! I'm not going to provoke Bastian and Lukas just to make your little Colombian happy! And I'll make you remember that for now, they didn't do anything to me or to Miroslav. He pointed out, and Toni thought that trying to convince him was completely useless.

But it looked like fate was on his side that day, because at the same moment that Thomas pronounced these words, a very angry Miroslav get out of the house, closing the door hard behind him. 

-Miro? Is something wrong? Thomas asked him, immediately seeing that his lover looked really upset.

-Yes, something is wrong. Bastian and Lukas thought that it would actually be funny to try to make me wear a false beard. I'm so fed up of them always wanting to make fun of me because of my age! He exclaimed, and in the background, James smiled smugly, understanding that this was going to be way easier than what he had expected.

-What did you just say, Thomas? I don't remember. Toni said, chuckling, and James had a small smile on his face.

-What is this about? Miroslav asked, confused.

-Well, Toni and James just offered that we could get united to try to prank Lukas and Bastian back. Do you think we should do it? Thomas asked gently, aware that the situation had radically changed.

-Of course we're going to work with them. There's no way I'm going to let those two get out of here as the winning team! Miroslav replied.

-We have a deal, then. James said, smiling wickedly.

-Do you have anything already planned? Miroslav asked, curious.

-Of course, who do you take us for? We planned to do our first pranks tonight when we'll be making dinner with them, you can help if you want. And there's others for tomorrow, but also for after this week-end. Revenge is a dish best savoured cold, after all. James said, grinning, trying not to blush too much as he remembered exactly how Toni and him had found these ideas- Which made him think that maybe he should pay Marcelo to make some prank on Toni when they would go back home, just so they could cuddle like that again, planning mischievous things.

As he exposed his plan, it seemed to please both Thomas and Miroslav. James was already imagining how he would be able to use these unexpected allies. Now that he had them by his side, he was hoping to prank Lukas and Bastian twice as much as he had first planned. This was going to be real fun, he was sure of it.

-If you want to go back to the house, you can. Philipp went to sulk in his room with Manuel; it doesn't take very well to not be the captain of the team anymore, I think. That and the fact that he must be furious that Lukas and Bastian have material to blackmail him.

-Let's go then. And James, stop smiling like that, or everyone will understand what we were doing. Toni warned him.

-Or they'll think that you were really good to me, once again. James replied, a wicked smile on his lip.

-Yeah, that's what you say now, and when we'll go back, you'll be blushing if anyone points out something like that. I don't know if you're really a good actor, or if you're only shameless when you're with me. Toni whispered in his ear, regretting that he actually didn't get to do anything with James.

-You're a big guy, I'm sure you can figure it on your own. James teased him.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!^^ As always, thanks to everyone who is reading this story :)  
> I wish you a good week-end, and I hope you'll have fun with this chapter :D

-You're back just in time. Sami said when he saw James and the three others entering the living room, after making sure that Philipp wasn't there anymore.

-In time for what? Toni asked, clueless.

-In time for beginning to make dinner. We did it this morning, so now it's yours, James, Lukas and Bastian turn to do it, we won't be the only ones working. And like Philipp left anyway, we're going to go back to our rooms while you're doing it. He explained, and that's only at that moment that Toni noticed that they were all going to leave. They surely didn't want to be here if they declared a war to Bastian and Lukas. James was relieved that him and Toni were actually prepared for what was to come.

-Well, if I can spend some time alone with Miro, I think we're only going to help you after dinner, guys. Try to stay alive with those two Thomas said while making sure that Lukas and Bastian didn't hear him, and his lover nodded behind him.

James rolled his eyes, happy that he didn't need these two for his plan to work. If it had been the case, Toni and him would be in deep trouble. 

-See you later then, I guess. Toni said, a little worried that him and James were going to be alone with Lukas and Bastian, but doing his best not to show it. It wasn't a good idea to let Lukas and Bastian know that they were a little afraid of them and their pranks.

-Yes, try to make something eatable without burning the whole house down, I'm sure Philipp wouldn't appreciate it, and there would be more trouble! Thomas said as they were all living in a rumble of chairs, except of course for Bastian and Lukas, who waited for them to be gone to finally stand up. It didn't help to make James and Toni feel better.

After they all left, Lukas and Bastian smirked at James and Toni, trying to impress them. But then they decided that teasing them a little would be a good way to begin things.

-Don't look at us like that, I think that right now you've got more to fear from Manuel than from us. First you almost ate his Nutella, and now you hurt Philipp by not obeying to his orders. Lukas pointed out, and James looked away. He couldn't admit in front of them that he had acted like that not to face another one of their pranks.

-We're not here for this kind of things, we need to make proper dinner, remember? We should at least try to work together. Toni said, changing the subject.

He exchanged a quick look with James, knowing that the dinner making would probably not go well anyway, not with what they had planned, but he couldn't let the two other men understand it. Him and James surely wouldn't get out of it unscathed either, but slyer pranks would wait for later. Right now, Lukas and Bastian would surely be too suspicious for it to work anyway. 

For now, all they wanted was to do something that would make Lukas and Bastian understand that they weren't untouchable like they seemed to believe, and that they wouldn't give up on their revenge any time soon.

Earlier, James had asked Toni if he wasn't afraid of what the duo could reveal about him. Toni had answered him that it didn't bother him if Lukas and Bastian showed what they had done to him during some of their pranks. What mattered for him was to show them once and for all that they couldn't do everything they wanted without paying for it. Especially when it concerned James. And James found it cute that his boyfriend was so protective of him, and this side of him showed more than ever now that they were with the German NT.

Toni also had less to fear than the others, because he hadn't been the main target of Lukas and Bastian before. Usually, he managed not to be noticed by them, and they mostly focused on pranking people who were a little two serious for them, like Philipp or Miroslav for instance. 

But then again, coming to his national team with a Colombian lover wasn't a good way to stay unnoticed. Not that he would change it for anything in the world. Meeting James was the better thing that had ever happened to him. Even better than winning that World Cup a few months earlier. 

-So, what are we going to prepare for dinner? Bastian asked, making them all realize that they didn't think about it earlier. 

-I suggest we go to the kitchen and see what we have there. Toni said, hoping that they wouldn't come up with too weird ideas.

-Why don't we just command some take away? Like that, we wouldn't have to work at all. Bastian intervened.

-I'm sorry, but I don't think that the rest of your team will accept to eat anything without knowing exactly what is in it, not after what you did to Manuel. I think Toni is right, and I am not only saying that because he is my boyfriend. James replied.

That last sentence made Lukas and Bastian chuckle, and they stared at him as if they wanted to tell him “of course, we're going to believe that”. He blushed slightly, pouting, but it mostly helped him not to show that he wanted them to make dinner with Toni and him so that they could put their plan into action.

-Let's go then. Bastian accepted, because he had to admit that James had a point there.

But when they arrived to the kitchen they discovered that before doing anything, they first would have to wash most of the dishes. Despite Philipp trying to make his teamates work at least a little, they didn't do much, letting all the work for the four who were, according to them, responsible of most of their problems. 

-We're are all going to do it, if you try to run away, I'll tell Philipp. Toni warned his teammates, who sighed. Letting James and him take care of the dishes and only helping them for the actual cooking had looked like a really good idea, too bad their friend had seen it coming. 

-Two of us can wash it, and the two others dry it, what do you think? James suggested, trying to win time, because dinner wasn't that far away, and their friends wouldn't be happy at all if it wasn't ready when they would come back.

To their great surprise, they actually worked quite well together, James and Toni doing the washing and Lukas and Bastian the drying. However, James suddenly had a new brilliant idea. It looked like one of their friends had taken the bucket Lukas and Bastian had used to prank James and had washed it here, leaving it next to the sink.

And so James had begun to fill it with water discreetly, glass after glass, stopping it whenever Bastian and Lukas looked at him. However, he was so furtive that Toni didn't notice it either, believing that his boyfriend was only working and waiting for the good time to begin pranking the two other men.

It took a long time, but James finally managed to fill the bucket completely. He waited until Lukas and Bastian were busy putting the dishes back in the cupboards to sneak behind them, and to throw all the water on them. They dropped the dishes in surprise, as James was busy laughing hard, Toni smirking. It looked like in the end, James didn't need him to have good ideas.

-You're going to regret this! Lukas growled, and he took the nearest water bottle he could find, opened it, and tried to throw all the water on James, but the boy managed to escape it, and it all fell on the floor. Toni and him were too far to actually reach the water, and they opened the fridge, looking frantically for some kind of weapon. They found a milk bottle, and stroke back with it. James tried to look for something they could use as a shield, but he didn't find anything. 

They threw everything they could at each other, and after sometime, Toni had the good idea to hide behind the fridge door, since they had to kept it open anyway. The kitchen was slowly turning into a true battle field, but they didn't care, too happy that they were to see Bastian and Lukas completely covered with all kinds of food while they were still untouched.

However, they played fair, not using anything that could hurt the other men. The food fight was becoming more and more intense, James and Toni now using cream and cheese, Bastian and Lukas fruit juice and soda. 

But soon enough, the fridge was empty, and James found a bottle of something only inches away. Without trying to know what it actually was, he emptied it on Bastian and Lukas, some of it also falling on the floor in front of him. 

But he should have thought twice before actually doing it, because it turned out to be an oil bottle. It made the floor became slippery, and what had to happen happened, and they all fell, and it turned out to be impossible to stand up again. That's only then that they took in just how ruined the kitchen actually was. 

-Let's say that we're even and stop the fight for now. I must admit that I didn't expect you to do something like this. You almost beat us. Too bad you used that oil bottle. Lukas said, still laying on the floor. He had understood by now that trying to get on his feet was useless.

-That's a deal. But I didn't think you were stupid enough to think that I wouldn't want to take revenge of you after a bucket of spicy sauce fell on me because of you. James replied.

-Maybe we should try to find a way to stand up again, and to clean the kitchen before Philipp finds out what we did. Or else he is going to be very, very mad at us. Right now, I'm happy he isn't our captain anymore, because we would all suffer if he still was. Let's begin the cleaning. Toni pointed out.

It would have been a great idea, if at that exact moment, the kitchen's door didn't open on Manuel and Philipp, who looked quite worried.

-What the hell is going on here? Philipp exclaimed. 

-We're really sorry, you see, we kind of had a food fight against...

But Bastian never had the chance to finish his sentence, because Philipp and Manuel made a step inside of the kitchen before they could stop them, and just like them before, they tripped on the slippery floor. Manuel barely managed to pull Philipp in his arms so that the smaller man fell on him and didn't hurt himself.

-Don't tell me that I can't let you four alone for five minutes without everything turning into hell! Philipp exclaimed.

-You should see the bright side of life, Fips, I like holding you like that. Manuel said, wrapping his arms around him, not wanting his lover to feel bad again or to get desperate for the future of his team, even if he had good reasons to be worried.

-Please, at least tell me that no one his hurt. Philipp let out. 

-We're alright. However, I'm afraid that there's no food left in the fridge. James let out, looking down. Guess that it was what he got for being mean to Philipp earlier, even though he didn't regret fighting against Bastian and Lukas and almost winning.

-I told you we should have bought take way. By the way, you must know that it's James who began all this. We're innocent for once! Bastian added, which didn't help the young Colombian.

-Well, James wouldn't have done it to if you didn't made that bucket fall on him in the first place. And he only threw water on you at first, it could have stopped there. Toni replied, putting a hand on his boyfriend's leg- it was the nearest part of James body he could reach, and it stayed more romantic than putting a hand on his foot.

-Hey, it wasn't suppose to happen to him, but to Manuel! It's not my fault he was more intelligent than planned! Lukas exclaimed, before remembering that Manuel was with them, and that it wasn't a really good idea to say that in front of him.

-Could you please stop acting like children! Now we're stuck here because of you! Philipp let out, fed up with the situation.

-You shouldn't complain, at least you're in Manu's arms, while I'm too far away from my Basti. Lukas whined, which made Philipp wonder which god he had angered to deserve al this. Maybe all of them, he didn't see any other option. 

-Anyway, I think our meal is on the floor, isn't it? Philipp said, sighing, slowly losing faith in life. He couldn't believe that they didn't even manage to cook something withoutturning the kitchen into a mess.

-Don't worry, Fips, if you're too hungry, I'll get some Nutella for the two of us. Manuel offered, stroking his back.

They all went silent, and suddenly Philipp exclaimed:

-Manu! You're yourself again!

-What do you mean, I'm myself again? Manuel asked, raising an eyebrow, caressing the smaller's man hair, not caring about the fact that everyone was looking at them.

-You want to eat Nutella again, despite what Lukas and Bastian did earlier. Although now that I think about it, I shouldn't be so happy about that. But still, I'm glad you're not traumatized anymore. He admitted. 

-Ah, you see, in the end that food fight was a good idea! Toni said, trying to find an excuse for his boyfriend. James was beginning to wonder if this situation could get any worse.

He had his answer when the door got opened again. This time, they all had the same reaction, shouting:

-No! Don't come in!

But it was already too late. A few seconds later, Mats and Benedikt joined them on the floor, grunting.

-Let me guess: you heard weird noises and you wanted to make sure that those four weren't ruining our food accidentally, right? If you want to know everything, not only they did ruin it, but they did it on purpose, since it seemed that they thought that it would be a good idea to make a food fight. And now you're stuck here with us. Philipp summed up, sighing.

-I just hope someone will be intelligent enough not to enter the kitchen right away. We need something to wipe the floor, or people will just keep on falling. James said, getting more and more desperate.

-But if I have to be honest, seeing Lukas and Bastian like this is worth it. James, Toni, you did great. But I'll still make you clean the kitchen when we'll get out. If we manage to get up before the end of the week-end. Philipp decided.

-Please, instead of complaining, be silent while I call Marco so he can come to get us out of this mess. Mats complained, bitter because he had believed that the others would never let him place a word, and they all shut up.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,  
> I'm sorry it took me so long to update this story.  
> I must admit this chapter is surely very fluffy, but with what happened during Bayern's game yesterday, I just needed lots of fluff, and couldn't really manage to write anything else. :S I hope you'll bear with me   
> Anyway, as always I hope you'll love this chapter :)

When Marco's phone rang, he was busy leaving kisses on Mario's neck, his lover laying on the bed, and he so decided it would be better to act as if he hadn't heard anything. But Mario put a hand on his shoulder, making him stop for a second.

-Maybe you should answer. He advised him, even though it was obvious that he really wanted Marco to finish what he had begun.

-I'm sure it's nothing important. And even if it is, for me nothing is more important than you. I want to enjoy our time together. Marco replied, trailing little kisses on Mario's jaw until he reached his lips. But at the same moment, the phone rang again, making him groan, but it didn't make him leave Mario. At the third time, he began finding it really annoying, and by the fourth, he finally realized that he wouldn't be left alone until he answered or switched off his phone.

-I don't know who it is, but they really want to speak to you. Take the call, and try to be nice, even if it annoys you. I can wait five minutes, you know. Mario chuckled, finding his lover's exasperation somehow quite adorable. 

-Alright, but it'd better be something really important. He groaned, and as he sat on their bed reaching for his phone, Mario began massaging his shoulder in order to make him relax.

-Hello? Mats, can I know why you're calling me when we are in the same building? Wait, what? He asked, as a very curious Mario tried to get closer to the phone to know what was actually going on.

-Okay, I'm coming. Though you must admit that this situation is completely unbelievable. I mean, it makes me understand why Philipp is sometimes so worried about the future of the team. Marco said before hanging up the phone, looking at Mario desperately, making it obvious that he really needed a hug, which the younger man was happy to provide.

-What did they do, this time? Knowing them, I'm sure it will sound funny when we'll manage to come over the fact that it kept us from making out. It's not like if we expected this week-end with all our teammates to be normal, right? I'm sure we would all be bored way too soon if it was the case. Mario assured him, trying to convince Marco of it, but also himself.

-Well, from what I have understood, instead of cooking, James, Toni, Lukas and Bastian thought that it would be a good idea to have a food fight. Except that they had the even better idea to use oil while doing so. Result, they slipped on it, and the same happened to Manuel and Philipp, then to Mats and Benedikt when they went to see what happened. And know we have to help them to get out of this mess. Marco sighed.

For a moment, Mario stared at him, speechless, and a minute after, he burst out laughing, not believing this could be really happening. Maybe the fact that it sounded completely unreal made it even more funny than anything he could have expected

-Damn it, I swear I can't believe I'm younger than them all. What are they really, five years old? And I'm sure that oil could have had some more interesting uses anyway. He said, almost purring, getting closer to Marco, still a little breathless from his laughter.

-You know that teasing me like that when I should be helping our friends isn't really a good idea, and it isn't kinf for them either. Marco scolded him, but it didn't keep him from leaving a gentle kiss on Mario's lips. He couldn't help it, he loved him too much.

-What are you talking about? I meant we could use it for cooking. It's not my fault if you have such a dirty mind and want to corrupt me. Mario teased him.

-Sure, keep thinking I'm going to believe that. Sometimes I'm pretty sure things work the other way around. Anyway, we should go help our friends before they get really angry at us, and more importantly, before I change my mind and decide to stay here cuddling with you. Marco said, standing up.

-Am I selfish for liking that last option more? Mario asked, but despite what he was saying, he stood up as well, trying to rearrange his clothes and his hair so it wouldn't be too obvious that him and Marco had just been making out. Not that their teammates wouldn't guess it anyway, but he could as well try to save the appearances, right? 

 

-What is taking him so long? Mats complained, taking a look at his watch. Okay, knowing that Marco was with Mario, he actually had an idea on what they had been doing before he called. But he thought he had made it clear that they needed to be rescued quite quickly. 

By now, Toni and James were both looking down and had apologized at least a hundredth time to Philipp, realizing that they had gone too far. This and the fact that Manuel had been staring at them threateningly until they did so, and since that first Nutella episode, James had decided that angering Manuel was definitely a really bad idea. 

It was needless to say that Bastian and Lukas were now grinning wide, making faces at them when the others weren't looking. Or so they thought. Mats really wished that him and Benni hadn't been caught in this. Unfortunately, it was too late for that. So him and Benni had silently decided not to take part for any of them and to be discreet until Marco would come to rescue them. 

-It's not because for once you're not guilty that you should make fun of them. Do I need to remind you of all the pranks you've done before? Philipp let out, scolding Lukas and Bastian, even though it was hard for him to be impressive when he was laying on top of his lover, blushing slightly at the situation he was in, though he certainly would have enjoyed it a lot, had Manuel and him been alone.

-Can't you let us enjoy being innocent? You're no fun, I mean, it's not like it's going to happen again anytime soon. Lukas whined, but none of them missed the mischief in his eyes, understanding that this was more of a threat than a real complain. 

-And me who thought that this week-end would be relaxing. Benedikt sighed, quietly so only Mats could hear him. As a support, he took his hand in his, the only part of his body he could reach right now, at least not without crawling, and he wasn't going to do something like this in front of his fellow teammates.

Before they could talk more, Marco appeared at the door, followed shortly by Mario, but they made sure not to step into the oil, and they threw cloths on the floor. 

-I think you should be able to stand on it. Marco said. They did as they were told, though it took some time for Philipp and Manuel to disentangle from each other without falling again. Soon enough, they were all on their feet, outside of the kitchen, but still soaked in oil. 

-Well, I guess we'll just need to go back to our rooms to wash ourselves. Mats said, noticing how Marco and Mario made sure to stay away from them to be sure that they wouldn't get some oil on them.

Toni had a hard time not smirking, remembering how that last shower had gone, but he knew that looking overjoyed wasn't a good thing to do in front of his teammates. Except that all his hopes suddenly disappeared when James said:

-Go take a shower, Toni. I'll clean the kitchen, after all it was my fault this all mess happened, though to be honest I didn't think it would go so far. So now I must take my responsibilities.

-But I can help you, you don't have to do it all alone, you know. He replied, definitely not wanting to leave him alone.

-Come on, we both know that if we stay together, we won't get much work done. Furthermore, I'm sure you'll be more useful trying to find something to eat for everyone. If it doesn't bother you, of course, it's just that I'm not sure I'll have enough time to do it all on my own. James explained, at the same time looking at Philipp, hoping that it would be enough to make the former captain of Die Mannschaft forgive him.

Toni nodded, even though he didn't like the idea of being separated from his James, even if it wasn't for long.

-Okay, I'll try to get what we need while you'll stay here. But don't overdo it though, even if you think it was your fault all this happened. I mean, if I bring you to Madrid more exhausted than when you left, the others are going to kill me, and I'm not even talking about the coach. Toni joked, happy when he saw that bright smile he loved so much appear on James' face again.

-Don't worry, I'll be fine. The young Colombian assured him, kissing him on the cheek, not wanting too be too exuberant in the front of the team, but Toni answered by kissing him full on the mouth, making him blush slightly. 

-Well, it looks like you are really embarrassed when I flirt with you in public. You were right though, I figured it on my own. Toni then whispered in his ear after they were done kissing, making sure that James would be the only one hearing him. Then he parted from him, leaving behind him a James whose cheek were now crimson red. So maybe he shouldn't have teased Toni that much.

But before he left, Toni made sure to be face to face with Bastian and Lukas, telling them:

-You'd better not mess with James while I'm away, or you'll have to deal with me afterwards. Understood? 

-Oh, Toni, who do you take us for? Bastian asked, trying to look completely innocent, which obviously was an epic fail, and James sighed, wondering what was going to happen again.

-He just takes you for who you are. And since you obviously aren't planning to get involved in the cleaning, you will go wash yourselves as well, because I don't want you walking around and getting the house dirty. And don't even try to talk about the fact that Bastian is captain and that I am not anymore if you don't want to get into trouble. Philipp intervened.

All the members of Die Mannschaft knew when it was best not to cross him, and so Bastian and Lukas obeyed Philipp, although they were also well decide to take that shower quickly enough to get ready for more pranks as soon as possible.

-Don't worry, I'll try to keep these two in sight. Philipp assured Toni as they all headed towards their respective rooms, except of course for James who still had to take care of the kitchen.

He looked around, evaluating the damages, but he had to recognize nothing would have happened without him, and so he began scrubbing the floor with a cloth, wondering how long it would take him. Probably the whole evening. Maybe he shouldn't have been so flirty with Toni today, because in the end, he might be too tired to do anything else than sleep when he would finally get to his bed. 

However, he was surprised when he realized that he wasn't alone, hearing footsteps behind him, and for a moment, he believed that Lukas and Bastian had decided to disobey Philipp's orders, but when he turned around, he realized that it was Mario and Marco who had stayed when the others had left, and were beginning to help him clear the room.

-Thank you, that's really nice, but I should be doing that alone. It's me who began all this, so it's only normal that I repair what I've made. You'd better enjoy your time together. Doing the cleaning won't be that hard. He said, even though he did believe it would be, but he didn't want these two to waste their week-end, or at least a part of it, helping him.

-Don't be stupid, you'll never manage to clean all that before tonight all on your own, and if you don't, we'll hardly get dinner made. And by staying here, we can also make sure that Bastian and Lukas don't come and make things worse. Mario explained, but something told James that all he and Marco wanted to do was to tell James he was right and go back to their rooms.

-So either you're here for the food, or Toni convinced you to came here until Philipp would come back, or it's Philipp himself who told you to stay here to make sure nothing bad happened again. Which one is the good answer? James asked.

After all, if he had the choice- which he unfortunately didn't have- between cleaning the kitchen or spending some time alone with his lover, he wouldn't have to think about it twice.

-To be honest, a little of all three. And now that Philipp is here again, we can't just all stay in our rooms either. And since you look like you want to get back at Lukas and Bastian for their pranks, we could at least help you find something which could actually work without destroying half of the house. Marco offered, but this time, Mario looked as surprised as James.

-Are you're sure about that? I'm not so sure that getting involved in this is a good idea. I don't want to have to face Bastian and Lukas' revenge afterwards. He explained to his lover, still remembering quite well what the two prankers were capable of.

-Honestly, I think Mario is right. I surely won't even have the time to do anything against them tonight anyway, and there's already some members from the team helping us. It's not worth putting yourself in danger. James said. Of course, more allies were welcome, but it also meant that there were more risks that Lukas and Bastian may discover their plans before it was put in action. 

And he also had the feeling that getting in the way between Mario and the somehow peaceful week-end he had dreamed of would be a really, really bad idea, and he still wanted to leave a good impression to the team, even if it looked like for the moment, it wasn't working at all. He had to be smarter than Bastian and Lukas while acting wisely enough not to cause another catastrophe. Or at least he would try. But he would think about plans later, right now, cleaning was more important.

 

Bastian and Lukas were done showering, and they had decided that trying to prank James right away wouldn't be a good idea. Not because Philipp obviously didn't want them to do it, of course not. If it had been a reason for them not to do pranks, then they would have had to stop doing it years ago. 

No, the real reason was that James would surely be expecting it, and it would spoil all the fun of surprising him. Waiting a little was a much better idea, especially since they had everything planned. Except that for now, they were bored. And everyone in Die Mannschaft knew that a bored evil duo could only mean more trouble.

Luckily for them, the microphones they had put in the kitchen seemed to have survived the food fight, and so they had been able to hear the whole conversation between James, Marco and Mario, which had given them new ideas.

-So, why do you think? Lukas asked, smiling like a shark who was just about to chase a fish until it would be too exhausted to escape from him.

-Well, I think that we should definitely find who is actually helping James and Toni. But before doing that, maybe we could show Marco that it's not a good idea to try to side against us. Bastian suggested, and it was exactly what his boyfriend and ally in pranks had had in mind. 

-Guess that we're going to need a new idea for a prank, then...

 

Meanwhile, In Thomas and Miro's room...

-I think I heard noises downstairs, do you think we should check what is happening? Miroslav asked, as he softly caressed Thomas' hair, the younger one cuddling against him in their bed, his eyes closed.

-Hmm, no. Whatever it is, I'm sure they can find a way to solve it on their own. At worse, they're going to ruin the dinner, and then will have an excuse to go eat somewhere where it will be just the two of us, or to order something and eat it alone in our room. So I don't see why we should bother checking on them, especially when we're having just a great time, don't you think? Thomas purred, raising up a little so he could kiss his Miro.

-I don't know why, but I wouldn't be that surprised if you actually really wanted them to ruin the food. And me who thought you wanted to be really active on getting our revenge on Bastian and Lukas. Miroslav said, smiling and caressing Thomas' cheek.

-Well, maybe I fancy spending time with you more than trying to get back at them. I'm sure this revenge thing can wait until I'm done cuddling with you. Anyway, if they really manage to do ruin the food, I'm definitely taking you on a date in a restaurant. Thomas promised, stretching slightly before going back to his original place in Miroslav's arms.

-Maybe I'm going to ruin the food myself, then. Although I'm not sure Philipp's going to be happy with us leaving for the evening, even if there's not many food here. It kinda goes against the idea of the team reunion. He surely would try to organize a group dinner outside or something. The older man made him remember.

-It looks like I really have a bad influence on you. But you won't get anywhere, you'll stay here so I can cuddle you until I say so. And if it were to happen, I'm sure we could find a way for Philipp to let us go. A mischievous Thomas answered, getting even closer to his Miro.

-And what if they actually manage to cook something available? Miroslav asked, only to tease his lover.

-I don't know why, but I have the feeling that it would take a miracle for it to actually happen. But what would you think of less talking, and more cuddling and kissing? Asked a not only mischievous, but also flirty Thomas.

-I think it would be a great idea. Miro answered, hugging him tightly, both unaware of the mess they had luckily escaped being involved in.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,  
> It took me a little longer than planned to post this chapter, it should have been up yesterday, but I had the opportunity to go and see the new Avengers in theaters, so...  
> I hope you'll like it anyway ;) And of course, thanks for all the comments and kudos I received on this story :D

-We already worked well enough, I think we deserve a break. Mario let out when they were half-done cleaning the kitchen. Marco let go of the cloths he was using, but James kept working, not showing any sign of being distracted from he was doing by Mario's suggestion..

-Okay, but I think I'm going to keep cleaning while you'll be resting, I'd like to have as much as possible work done before Lukas and Bastian come back to prank me, because then I have the feeling it'll be way much more complicated than now. He explained while trying to make disappear a very persistent stain in the middle of the room.

-Come on, I'm sure you should take some rest too, it won't be that long and I think you need it. Anyway, Lukas and Bastian are not that bad, and I'm sure they won't keep from cleaning the kitchen, since you promised Philipp to do it. I really think you should take five minutes to relax too, you'll be working faster afterwards. Marco encouraged him, and this time, James didn't hesitate to stop right away, sighing.

-I swear it's the last time I have a food fight. It may be fun while it lasts, but it's too much trouble afterwards. I'm sorry I made such a mess, you're both really kind to help me, I still think I don't deserve it. James thanked them.

He saw that Mario and Marco were eyeing each other insistently, not realizing they were making it obvious that they would like to have so time alone, and so James smirked and told them:

-You know, if you want to spend that break somewhere else making out, I won't complain.

The two German players turned bright red, but it didn't keep Mario from whispering a “thank you” before grabbing Marco's hand and leaving with him, James forcing himself not to laugh at the scene, because he knew he wasn't really better when he was with Toni.

He was still a little surprised that Lukas and Bastian hadn't come back to bother him yet, but he decided that he wasn't going to complain about it. He would just keep watching out for the next prank, hoping that they had miraculously forgotten about him.

But in the meantime, he decided to pour himself a well-deserved glass of fresh water. For some reason, he found that cleaning was way more exhausting than running non-stop on the field during a game. But maybe he saw it that way because he found it more boring, too. But he had to do this chore and he knew it well. And at least he had gotten some unexpected help.

However it soon turned out that the break Mario and Marco had decided to take was lasting for way more than five minutes, but James couldn't blame them. After all, if Toni was here with him, he was sure he would get almost no work done at all. And the two men weren't responsible for what had happened, contrary to James, so the Colombian just began to work alone, just how he had planned to do all along.

That's when he heard a message arriving on his phone. He reached for it, and smiled fondly just after he read what was written on the screen.

“Don't worry for the dinner, it'll be alright. I just need to do one more thing, and then I'll come with you. It shouldn't be too long. Don't work too much while I'm gone. Love you.  
Toni”

Knowing that there wouldn't be more trouble because of his childish behaviour made James relax, and when he went back to cleaning the floor. It suddenly felt less annoying than before, because Toni's words were still in his mind, helping him to cheer up. But it didn't mean he wasn't going to make sure the kitchen would be perfectly clean, though.

He really wished he would be able to get a shower quickly though, and that this time, he wouldn't have to have another one just after because of something happening with Lukas and Bastian.

 

-Do you think we should go back to our room? Marco asked just after he left the kitchen, hardly resisting the temptation to kiss Mario before they got there.

-That's an idea. Or maybe we could go in the garden, you know, enjoy the sun together. We can't stay locked in our room during the whole week-end, you know. Mario suggested, leaning against Marco in a way that made the older man unable to refuse him anything.

-I guess the garden sounds great, then. Although if you keep looking at me like that, I think we'll never get there. Marco replied, before seizing Mario's lips with his own.

-Well, taking my time wouldn't really bother me this much, especially if you kiss me again like that. But I really want to go outside afterwards, okay? Like that, if someone almost blows up the house again, we won't have to worry about it. Mario replied, making puppy eyes at him. 

-You do realize this was supposed to be a five minutes break, right? Marco laughed, cupping his lover's face in his hand.

-But what about time relativity? Let's just say that those are very, very long five minutes. Mario replied, smiling tenderly at Marco. 

-It doesn't work like that, and you know it. And if James complains about us being late, it'll be your fault. Marco replied, smiling too. But it wasn't really surprising, Mario smile had always been contagious to him, affecting Marco each time he was near the other man.

-Maybe, but I don't care. I mean, we can't be together often, so now that we are, let's enjoy it. Mario replied, pushing Marco into a corner before kissing him. The Dortmund player decided that he really shouldn't complain, and let him do so. He was certain James could take care of the kitchen alone, most of the work was already done anyway. And so he chased away all thoughts that weren't concerning directly him, Marco and kissing, unaware of the fact that in the meantime, the evil duo was planning against them.

 

-So, let's me sun it up: they're going to the garden, but according to what we just heard, they won't be there before some time. Lukas said, trying to see how this could go with the several plans they had thought about to get back at Marco for trying to side with the enemy- when he had used that term before, Bastian had laughed, before saying that they were going to lead the guerilla against James and Toni. He really loved his hase and their common sense of humour.

-At least, one thing is obvious: we must set our trap in that garden. But it must be something they won't be expecting, and that we didn't use recently, so buckets full of water or other things are out of the way. It could have been fun, though. Bastian sighed.

-Oh, because what we did this morning wasn't fun? Come on, all the things we did with that icy sauce were hilarious! Although you gave me an idea. I think we should go for a classical joke, only changing it a little from what we usually do. I mean, it's not a personal revenge, we just want to warn them to stay out of our business, doesn't we? He suggested, and for a moment, him and Lukas couldn't help but laugh at that last sentence. They loved faking to take this thing really seriously way too much, even for their own good. But mostly for their friends' good.

-It sounds like you have an idea, would you please share it with me? Bastian asked him after they both caught their breaths again, eager to know what kind of mischief they were going to be up to next.

-Well, you see, it's been a long time since I've wanted to try this... He explained, smirking, while he exposed his new plan to Lukas, lowering his voice so that only his partner in crime could hear him. They'd rather be prudent, after all they were always expecting their teammates to one day realize how they 

-Well, it can be great, although I'm not that happy someone else than me gave you an idea for a prank. Bastian said afterwards, pouting. 

-Oh, come on, you're not going to get jealous for that? Anyway, I'm sure Olivier never expected I would one day used what he told me to imagine a prank. And he's with Mathieu anyway, so I don't see why you're acting like that. The important is that we know what to do to prank Marco, no? Lukas asked, although Bastian was still sulking.

-But I thought you only talked about pranks with me! That's like cheating on me! How could you do that do me? Bastian whined, and Lukas sighed, because he knew they didn't have that much time before Marco and Mario would get to the garden, and that if Bastian kept acting like this, they would never manage to set up their trap in time.

-Actually, we weren't talking about this, but about French history- don't ask me how our conversation went to that, because I honestly don't remember, we surely were drunk after a victory or something. - and that's when Olivier talked about that guy who died centuries ago but who already liked to prank people around him, imagining all kinds of new things to do it. Come on, you know me, I would never plan any mischief without you. Lukas promised, taking Bastian's hand in his, looking him straight in the eyes to show him that he was sincere.

-Really? Bastian asked.

-Really. Although maybe I shouldn't have told you so, you're really cute when you're jealous. Lukas teased, leaning towards Bastian to kiss him, closing his eyes. But at the last moment the other man moved, and Lukas almost fell over.

-Eh! What was that for? He complained, annoyed.

-For flirting with someone else than me, even if it was by accident, like that I'm sure you won't do it again. And if I remember well, you said that we had to prepare our prank before Marco and Mario would get to the garden, right? His partner in crime replied, leaving their bedroom immediately, forcing Lukas to follow him.

-Why are you being so mean to me? You know that I love you! Bastian, please, listen to me! Lukas begged him, and at the same moment, they turned at a corner, only to find themselves face to face with Toni.

-So, we're having couple's problems? You know, maybe it's just karma for all the pranks you've done to us. It had to happen one day. Their younger teammate replied, smirking.

-It's your boyfriend who ruined the kitchen, so he should be the one with the karma's troubles! Lukas immediately replied defensively.

-Maybe, but from what I remember, you didn't make any attempt to stop the food battle afterwards, and right now James' cleaning alone, while you're staying in your room planning I don't know which kind of mischief and, apparently, fighting with each other. And do I need to remind you that he acted that way because of all the things you've done to us before? Toni said, raising an eyebrow. 

-Oh, you're trying to protect your boyfriend, that's cute! But despite what you seem to believe, he's not as brave as you think, cleaning the kitchen all alone. He's actually gotten some help. Okay, maybe it doesn't intervene in the karma thing, but still Bastian retorted, happy to make the other man see that he was wrong.

Except that he never thought it would backfire at him very, very quickly.

-What do you mean? You didn't leave your room since Marco and Mario went to help us, I know it, I've been here for some time now, how could you know James is not al...Wait, do you have a way to spy on us even when you're not there? Toni exclaimed, well determined to get an answer.

-Hum, we're sorry, but we have, er, things to do...You know, pranks to plan, annoying your boyfriend, angering Fips by telling him he's not captain anymore though he'll obviously always be to us, all that...Lukas said, grabbing Bastian's hand before running away with him, leaving behind a very suspicious Toni who now had an idea of what the evil duo based their strength on. And he would not allow it to last for much longer. But he would need the support of the team. He was sure they would agree with him once he would have told them what Bastian and Lukas had been doing.

He wondered who he should go to see next, so he finally decided that maybe Thomas and Miroslav were the best option, because he didn't want to bother Philipp right away after causing the mess in the kitchen- The fact that he had first thought about going to Philipp making him remember once again that he really would have a hard time to take in the fact that the other man wasn't his captain anymore in the German NT. Lukas had been right on that point, even if they were using it to annoy Philipp.

He knocked on the door four times quite hard before entering the room, just to make sure Miro and Thomas would know that he was coming and that he would not find them in an embarrassing situation. It had happened before, either be it with his national team or with Real Madrid, and he didn't want it to happen again, thank you very much, it was way too awkward. It was also the reason why he always made sure to lock his door when he was alone with James- One could never be too prudent.

When he finally entered the room, what he found was the two men half-asleep, buried under their covers, hugging each other. They both frowned at the light coming from the outside, not happy at all to be awoken.

-You know, us not answering the door actually means that we didn't want anyone to disturb us. So if you could please go away...Miroslav groaned, not even bothering too know who had entered, because his answer would have been the same anyway.

-I know, but it's very important! Please come with me, we can't talk here! He urged them.

-I don't see what could be more important than a nap with my Miro. Thomas replied, hiding his face in his pillow to escape the light. 

Toni sighed, trying to find a way to tell them what was actually going on without letting the duo know what he had guessed about their plan to trick them-or at least he thought so. And then, he had an idea.

He took his phone out, sending a message to Thomas, since he could see his phone near the bed. The Bayern player groaned when he heard the ringtone, reaching for his phone clumsily, until he reached it and read the message Toni had just written.

“I think Lukas and Bastian put microphones, or cameras or both here, and that's why they always act before us. We must warn the others and try to get back at them.”

-Do you think you can get up now? Toni asked Thomas.

-I'm sorry Miro, but I think we'll have to end that nap later. This definitely sounds like fun. He said, grinning.

 

 

-What are we going to do now? Bastian asked Lukas when they decided they were far enough from Toni, suddenly forgetting about how jealous he had been a few minutes before.

-I don't know, maybe you can figure it on your own, since nothing would have happened if you hadn't decided to be mean to me. I didn't do anything wrong in the first place, except talking with one of my friends, I didn't deserve you treating me like this Lukas replied, pouting, turning his back on him.

-But Luks, I need you, please...Bastian begged him, wrapping his arms around his lover's waist, his head resting on his shoulder.

-No, you've been too far, you won't get anywhere acting like this. I'm not talking to you anymore. He let out, wanting to make his lover apologize for his previous behaviour.

But to his surprise, Bastian let go of him, stepping away, and said:

-Okay, then, if you don't want me anymore, I guess I'll just have to find someone else with you I can organize pranks. I'm sure it won't be that difficult. Maybe I could ask Thomas or James, I'm sure they'd be glad to learn how we do it..

-Don't you dare do that! Lukas exclaimed, turning around just like Bastian had planned he would do, and so he took advantage of it to kiss him, his lover not strong enough not to accept the kiss hungrily.

-You see what it did to me to imagine you planning pranks without me, then? Although I do apologize if I was too hard on you, but you know how possessive of you I am. He told him afterwards, hiding his face in his lover's neck.

Lukas couldn't help smiling, not being able to be cold towards his Basti for any longer.

-I think we still have a prank to organize, don't we? And since Toni seems to have guessed about the microphones, it might be hard to have the upper hand afterwards, so I think so should use what we know quickly before our plan becomes useless, don't you think? He suggested.

-Well, that actually sounds like a good idea. But promise me you won't be so hard with me again, please. You know I love you, and I can't live without you. Bastian added, making love eyes at him.

-It's alright, I've already forgiven you, you don't need to sound like you just got out of some romantic novel. Lukas laughed, but he was smiling nonetheless.

-Let's do it, then. He said, finally heading towards the garden, as Lukas took a brief look at his watch, quickly making an estimation of how many time they had to plan that prank without getting in trouble.

Except that the truth was that when there were planning pranks, they almost always ended up in trouble one way or another. Not that it stopped them from doing it, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you a lot for reading ^^  
> If you want you can try to find who is that historical character Lukas talked about and who inspired his next coming prank. ;) Although I must admit he's not easy to find.  
> See you next chapter :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,
> 
> I'm sorry I'm so late with the updates of my stories, it's because all my exams are taking place right now, so I have less time to write. I also answered all the comments later, but thank you already, it always motivates me.
> 
> I hope you'll like this chapter, it goes crazy again, but by now I've lost all hopes of writing something about Die Mannschaft which doesn't go crazy, so...

Mario and Marco parted from each other, breathless but smiling widely, and Mario let his head rest on the Dortmund player's shoulder, sighing with happiness.

-I'm so glad we're together, you know? Nothing can ruin that, not even Bastian and Lukas' stupid pranks. As long as I'm with you, everything is alright. I wish this week-end would never end. He whispered in Marco's ear, making the other man's heart beat faster.

-You know it is the same for me. It will always be. I would stay like this, holding you in my arms, forever if I could. Marco replied, happy there was no one to disturb them. 

-Hmm, despite how good this sounds, and despite how much I love being in your arms, I think it would be a shame if we just had to stay like that, without being able to touch or undress each other...Mario purred, kissing Marco's neck, making his lover shiver. Not being together as often as they would like had some side effects, like Mario almost not being to take his hands away from him when they were together. And you would never catch Marco complaining about that.

-I can only agree with you on that. Marco replied. He was ready to slide his hands under Mario's shirt, not caring they were in the middle of a corridor, not able to resist the teasing attitude of his adorable boyfriend, when he heard footsteps. 

Even though their teammates were aware of their relationship-It would have been hard for them not be, with the two making love-eyes at each other all day and crying their hearts out when they were not together-, Marco didn't want someone to find them in this situation so that his Mario wouldn't be embarrassed. 

So he took the hand of the smaller man, their eyes meeting for a second, and they ended up running down the corridor, turning a few times, until they were sure to be out of sight, still breathless, but for a different reason this time, laughing and smiling stupidly.

-You know, maybe pretending we were just talking to each other would have been more appropriate than running away. Mario chuckled, leaning against Marco.

-Maybe, but it would have been less funny. Don't lie to me, I know you liked it. Marco replied, smirking.

-Okay, maybe you're right. Mario admitted, leaving another kiss on his lover's lips.

-What do you think we should do now? Do you want to go to the garden? Marco suggested, not wanting to deceive his lover. But now, Mario had other ideas in mind, and he began leaving small kisses on Marco's neck, making him lose all will to move from their spot.

-No, staying here making out with you is all I need. And we did promise to James we would help him, so we can't let that break last forever either. I suggest we stay here alone for a while, then go back to help him? Mario said while still deliciously torturing Marco's neck

-As you wish. Marco said, before pulling him even closer, uniting their lips once again.

They didn't notice that in their rush, they had made fall a little electronic device which had been fixed on the wall, just like they didn't notice they had stepped on it, destroying it for good. And of course, they didn't hear Lukas, who was already in the garden with Bastian, swear heavily when he discovered his micro had stopped to function, making it impossible to know what Marco and Mario had said to each other. 

 

Toni sighed when he saw Mario and Marco disappearing, running away like children. Did they expect him to scold them because they were making out in the corridor? Maybe he was upset he couldn't be with James, but he wasn't going to annoy other couples just because of that, his teammates should have known better. Although seeing how fast they left, it wasn't impossible they didn't even recognize him.

But if they didn't want to talk with him, very well then. The rest of the team now knew that Toni had discovered something, and they were going to gather all together to find a way to get rid of them. They didn't need Marco and Mario's help that much, they were already outnumbering the duo, and by far.

He had tried to convince Philipp to let James come with them instead of cleaning the kitchen, but his captain had refused, saying that they could do this without him, and that they would need the kitchen soon enough anyway. 

Toni had pouted to try to make him change his mind. And yes, he knew it was childish, but he was ready to do it if he could be with James again. He knew he couldn't really complain, since they were together most of the time, but still, he didn't like being separated from him.

But Philipp had stood firm, saying that if he didn't stop acting like a child, he wouldn't come to hear what exactly Toni had discovered about Lukas and Bastian. And so Toni had been forced to give up, no matter how much he wanted his James back.

-We really can't talk? Thomas whispered behind him for the hundredth time, and Toni rolled his eyes. Was it that difficult to understand that they couldn't let the prankster know just how much they had discovered? 

-You can talk, but not about you-know-what. Toni hissed, knowing that Thomas wouldn't shut up anyway.

-But about what can we talk then? Do you have an idea, Miro? Thomas asked, looking at his lover questioningly. 

-Well, I don't know...Maybe about how I'm going to take you to a date tonight? Sounds good enough, no? Miro answered, winking at Thomas, and Toni immediately turned around to face him, surprised.

-Tonight? You're not going to eat with us? He immediately exclaimed.

-Well, since we heard lots of noises coming from downstairs while we were taking our nap together, we assumed you had ruined dinner, which wouldn't be surprising at all, and so we decided to go to a restaurant together tonight. Being at a team meeting doesn't mean we can't take some time for ourselves. Thomas explained, looking lovingly at his Miroslav, who was more than glad to please the Bayern player.

-Oh no, I won't let you do that! Toni almost shouted, obviously upset.

-Sorry, but why does it anger you so much? I mean, if it was Philipp, I would understand since he wants us to spend the whole week-end as a team. But why do you want us to stay here so much? Thomas asked suspiciously.

Toni was going to answer, but then remembered that Lukas and Bastian were surely listening to them right now, and so he took some minutes to think, before finally explaining:

-Well, you were right, the food was indeed ruined, but don't expect me to tell you how, I don't want you to make fun of me, and I'm sure you will learn it soon enough anyway. All you need to know is that I was the one in charge to find a way for us to have something to eat again, and it really wasn't that easy, so I won't let my efforts go to waste. You will eat here tonight. Toni ordered them.

-And why should we obey you? If I want to go outside with my Miro, then I will. Thomas replied, not ready to let Toni order him around, especially if it implied losing a romantic dinner with Miroslav.

Toni frowned, knowing the secret plan he had come up with would fail if these two left for the night. And knowing Thomas, he wasn't sure he would accept to stay even if he managed to explain everything to him without Lukas and Bastian hearing them. 

-What what do you think Philipp would think of you leaving the team bonding dinner? He's still your captain at Bayern, I'm sure you don't want to anger him, right? Thomas asked him.

-Actually, we're not planning to tell him, we're going to leave before he noti...Oh no, you won't! Thomas exclaimed when he saw the way Toni was smirking.

-And why should I obey you? Philipp's will be happy to hear you doesn't care about what he says. Toni replied, using the words Thomas had said before against him, very proud of himself.

He looked apologetically at Miroslav, though. He wasn't that cruel, and maybe he would even help them to leave alone in the city the next day to make up for that, but right now he had everything planned, and he didn't want anything to go wrong. This was going to be just too fun.

-Thomas, I think it'll be wiser to report that diner to another time. Miroslav said, understanding from Toni's stare that there was more behind this than just not wanting to waste food. After all, he and Toni knew well that the other members of the team wouldn't have had that much trouble eating some extra food.

-But, Miro...Thomas complained, not believing his lover could give up so easily on their date.

-I know, Thomas, I wanted to go to, but I don't want you to get into trouble at Bayern. I don't want anything bad happening to you. He said, cupping the other man's face in his hand, making Thomas' heart melt. 

-You're too protective of me, you know? Thomas said, letting the older man wrap his arms around him, and he closed his eyes happily, because no matter what, being in his Miro's arms was the best thing he could dream off, and it was enough to make him forget he was upset.

Miroslav took advantage of the situation to look at Toni threateningly, making him understand that if he really didn't have a good reason to make him do this, he would suffer later. Toni gulped hardly, but decided to try not to show how afraid he was. He'd better not screw this up.

-We should join the others, they should be at the meeting point soon. Toni interrupted them, and Thomas groaned, annoyed to leave his Miro's arms, but they followed him all the same. 

 

-Damn it, there's no way to make it work again! Bastian complained, upset their whole plan could end up being a failure just because one of their micros had let them down, making it impossible for them to know if Marco and Mario were finally heading towards the garden or not.

Garden in which they already were, hiding at a corner, the wall of the house making sure that if someone went out, they wouldn't see the two pranksters. Everything was ready, all they needed now was their victims. Victims who didn't seem to be coming any time soon.

-Do you think we should give up on this one? Lukas asked bitterly, annoyed their perfect plan, which had cost him a fight with his lover, could fail so easily.

-I don't know, Luks. I know we've been waiting for a long time already, but maybe we should stay for a little longer. I'm sure this is going to work. Bastian insisted, not really believing in it, but he could feel Lukas was sad his plan didn't work, and so Bastian knew his mission was to try to cheer the other man up.

-Even if it doesn't work, we still have time to make lots of pranks before this week-end comes to its end, right? I'm sure we can do it. He added, and Lukas answered him with a smile.

-I love it when you try to make me feel better, you know? He said, leaning over Bastian to kiss him. But their kiss was brief, because they suddenly heard footsteps coming from the house. Their lips parted and they smiled widely at each other. If Lukas hadn't been embracing Bastian already, he surely would have jumped in his arms in happiness.

-It must be them! Thank you for not letting me give up, Basti, I love you! Now, let's show Marco he shouldn't try to side with the enemy! You're ready? Lukas whispered, smirking.

-Of course, I am. Bastian replied.

-You know what to do, then. The other prankster said.

 

Toni was happy to see Mario and Marco were the only ones who didn't come to hear what he had to say. Of course, Philipp and Manuel were there, since the former captain of Die Mannschaft still wanted to control what was happening, and Manu wouldn't leave him alone. But Benedikt, Mats, Sami and Mesut had come as well, because none of them were very pleased with the idea of the evil duo spying on them. 

Toni stayed silent, and made the others understood they'd better act that way as well. He knew he had to find a place where there weren't any micros. He had thought about it for some time, and had come with the conclusions that the garden was the only place where Bastian and Lukas surely didn't use it.

And so they left the house, not realizing they were heading into a trap which weren't even aimed at them. 

-Alright, I can tell you why I wanted you to gather here. I discovered how Lukas and Bastian managed to prank everyone so easily...He began, but he couldn't finish his sentence, because the pranksters had already come into action, not hearing him talking since they were now too far, and of course convinced they were attacking Mario and Marco, not them.

Suddenly, water splashed over them, blinding them for a moment, and despite his surprise, Toni was terribly annoyed. How did Bastian and Lukas managed to find what he was up too? Did they use cameras as well? He couldn't believe they achieved that without any of them noticing.

Anyway, he'd better stop thinking about this and find a way to understand what was exactly happening to them. He looked all around him, keeping an arm in front of his face so that the water wouldn't splash on him. He saw Sami trying to protect Mesut from the water falling all over them, and Manu trying to do the same with Philipp the moment he noticed it, thinking it was a good idea. 

But the captain of Die Mannschaft gently pushed him away, decided, just like Toni to discover what was exactly happening. As for Benedikt and Mats, they were quite annoyed of always getting involve into trouble when they had almost no part in anything in the first place.

And Thomas...Well Thomas had somehow managed to find a spot were the water couldn't hit him and had dragged his Miro with him, and was currently busy thinking about how good his Miro looked when his clothes were drenched, and how much fun this was going to be if another Schweinski hunt began, which was sure to happen soon. 

-You shouldn't look so happy when we're being pranked, you know. Miroslav whispered in his hear, while trying to find a way to help their friends.

-Maybe, but it's fun. Well, not being soaked, of course, but all the adventure that are going to come after this. And I don't see you in wet clothes that often, so let me enjoy myself for a while, won't you? Thomas asked, making pleading eyes at him.

-You know I can't refuse you anything. Miro sighed.

-Yay! Thomas exclaimed happily, and luckily for him, no one heard him say that.

 

It took Toni a minute, but finally, he discovered the truth on what was happening to them, and at the same time wondered how the two pranksters could come up with such weird ideas.

There were many pierced garden hoses on the ground, which obviously were where the water originated from. Toni tried to step on it, so that it would stop, but it only made the water come out weaker at some places, but stronger at others, which didn't really help him.

-Let's follow one of these. It will lead us to the source of water, and then we'll be able to stop it. Philipp advised him, and so Toni did as he was told. A few meters away, they stopped being assaulted by the water, and they found the water tap alimenting the hoses. And just next to it, two very shocked and slowly panicking pranksters, who were expecting to see only Marco and Mario, and were now facing nine angry players of their team.

-They don't really look like Marco and Mario. Lukas let out, stating the obvious, fear in his eyes. 

-I don't care about you blackmailing us or not, I'm going to make you pay for that. Growled a very soaked and very angry Philipp.

-Maybe we could negotiate? Bastian tried to suggest, feeling the wind had just turned for them and that they really, really shouldn't make their situation worse than it already was. 

-Well, what do you think? Should we accept that, after what they did? Philipp asked in a faked voice, making it obvious that he had already made his choice, and his friends understood it too.

-I think it's time for us all to take our revenge on them. Miroslav answered, making Bastian and Lukas' faces go white. If Miroslav, who was usually the calmer and more patient member of the team decided to go after them, then they were in big, big trouble. Miroslav did his best not to smile, knowing he would please Thomas by doing this. And he had to admit this was fun.

-Oh, it looks like I somehow influenced you again. I'm proud of you, Miro. Now the fun can really begin, I guess. Thomas said, smirking. 

Understanding they wouldn't get out of this unscathed, Bastian and Lukas looked at each other, before Bastian asked:

-Retreat?

-Retreat! Lukas confirmed, and they began running, the nine other men trying to catch up with them.

-You know, next time you come up with a plan made up by a man from the Middle-Ages, please remind me not to listen to you! Bastian groaned while running.

-Hey, the fact that it wasn't Marco and Mario in the garden had nothing to do with that. And this man had a whole castle full of pranks, he's like the ancestor of pranksters, so just for that I don't want you to say bad things about him! Lukas complained.

-Maybe, but he was a count or something, so if he ended up in trouble, he had a whole army to protect him, which we don't have.

-...Point taken. Lukas recognized, and then they stayed silent, concentrating their efforts on escaping. 

 

And while almost everyone was running after Lukas and Bastian, Marco and Mario were still happily making out in their corridor. And James, still cleaning the kitchen, heard the ruckus the other men were doing in the garden, and wondered if he was the only one doing something constructive in this house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, as for that historical prankster I mentionned, as I said he is barely known. His name was Robert II count of Artois, and despite taking part in wars, he was also a prankster and began the construction of a castle in the north of France in the 1290's, in the city of Hesdin (I didn't even know it existed before hearing about him, by the way.) And so the castle and the park was filled with mechanism made to prank people, like pipes on the floor spreading water on people passing by, statues spiting water on people, this kind of crazy stuff! But it was destroyed in 1553 when Charles V, the emperor of the holy roman empire and of spain took the city of Hesdin, and that's why it's quite hard to find informations on it.
> 
> It's far from being something important in history, but when I found out about that, I just knew I had to make somethign out of it with the evil duo ;)
> 
> Anyway, thank you a lot for reading, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter :D


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!^^  
> I'm finally free from my exams, and from uni in general, so now I have more time to write! *happy dance*  
> I hope you'll like this chapter :)

Mario and Marco had finally put an end to their making out, although it had taken them lots of self-control not to do it again- okay, they had stopped three or four times on their way to the kitchen to kiss each other again, but no one needed to know that, right?-, and now they were in front of the kitchen. But before they could enter, James got out of the room, wiping the sweat off of his forehead. He looked tired.

-I guess I don't need to know what you were doing. He stated, smirking at them, but the two German players didn't even blush at his remark. They spent so little time together that they weren't going to be ashamed to enjoy it.

-I guess we're guilty of what you think, but we all know what would have happened if Toni had been here too. So you are not really one to talk. Anyway, we came back to help you finish with the cleaning. Marco explained.

-Sorry, but you are too late for that. I'm just done with it. James announced, proud of himself. Now he hoped the team would stop having reasons to be mad at him.

-I didn't realize we were gone for so long. We are awful, I mean we came here saying we wanted to help you, and at the first occasion we ran away. Sorry. Mario said, even if he knew nothing forced them to help James in the first place.

-Don't be. It's only natural that you and Marco want to spend time alone. And as he said, I surely wouldn't be better than you if Toni was here. Anyway, just don't go into the kitchen yet. The floor is still wet, and if someone walks on it before it dries, I'll have to do the work all over again. James warned them. And seeing how exhausted this had made him, they had the feeling the man who would ruin his work would suffer. A lot.

-What are you going to do now? Mario asked, and this question made a bright smile appear on James' face.

-I thought it was obvious. I'm going to look for Toni, we've been away from each other for way too long. He said happily.

-I can't believe it. You two can't stay away from each other more than five minutes before feeling bad. I wonder how you even manage not to fall apart during international break. Marco chuckled.

-Don't make fun of them. There was a time when we were even worse than that. If I remember well, you even complained when I was not in the same room as you, and I wasn't any better. Not speaking about the fact that even if we spend less time together nowadays, simply because we can't, it doesn't keep us from sending messages to each other night and day. Do you only remember how I was during the world cup? I'm sure the others couldn't support how much I was whining about not having you back then. Mario reminded him.

-Is it me, or did you two not flirt enough while you were away? Because you're definitely still doing it. James stated, and this time, Mario couldn't keep himself from blushing.

-Wait until you finally get reunited with Toni, and then we will talk about flirting again. Marco replied, putting a protective arm around Mario's shoulder. Not that he thought Mario needed to be protected from James, of course, but he loved taking care of him way too much. And Mario let him do so, knowing that quite well, leaning against the taller man.

Little did they know that they wouldn't have to wait for long to see Toni again...

 

-Are they still behind us? Lukas asked. 

Bastian ran a little less quickly so he could check behind them, seeing that their angry teammates were still very determined to make them pay for their joke.

-Yes, they are. Don't stop running. If we are good enough, they won't catch up with us. He advised him.

-For how long do you think we will have to keep that up? Not that I'm tired, but we should find a way a better and quicker way to get rid of them. He groaned.

-Wait, I have an idea. Maybe if we go through the house they will lose us! I mean, it will be less hard to disappear at a corner than it is outside. He suggested.

-Basti, if we weren't so busy running away from them, I would kiss you right now. I always love your ideas to get out of trouble, they're always so great! Let's try that then. Lukas accepted.

They managed to reach the door of the house, getting inside as quickly as they could. They were glad it hadn't been locked, or else everything would have turned out wrong for them.

However, their teammates didn't get fooled by it and followed them inside.

And that's how James, Marco and Mario saw the two pranksters running towards the kitchen.

-Wait, you can't go there! James exclaimed, but they didn't listen to him in their rush. 

Bastian ran even more quickly than before in order to lose the men who were after them, but he stopped immediately when he realized Lukas was not with him anymore. He quickly turned back to realize that Lukas had slipped on the still wet floor, falling on the ground.

-Lukas! He called, rushing towards him.

-No Bastian, keep running. They must not get the two of us! Lukas shouted at him.

-But, I can't let you, Luks! He protested.

-You'll have to if you want to gain enough advance on them. You have to do this for me, Basti. Keep on pranking them even when I'll be their prisoner, don't let them any moment of peace! I trust in you, I know you can do it. He assured him.

-I'm sorry this went this way Luks, and I'm sorry for being jealous, or for saying bad things about your plan. I love you with all my heart, I promise. Bastian declared.

-I love you too, Basti. Now run, they are coming closer! He urged him.

Bastian forced himself not to look back as he kept running away. He knew he would not be able to leave if he did.

As for their teammates running after them, only half of them were lucky enough not to fall on the floor while chasing them. In the end, Manuel and Philipp were the only ones still following them, because a big part of the ones who didn't fall had stopped to help their lovers, who had. 

Both Thomas and Miroslav had fallen, but the younger one of the two was laughing at what happened to them, which kept his lover from being annoyed. Thomas was also making sure that Lukas wouldn't leave, forcing him to stay there by gripping at his ankle. As he had declared to Miroslav, taking revenge on him would be so much fun.

Mesut was helping Sami to stand up again, the Real Madrid player not happy at all with his fate, although he was relieved that Mesut didn't fall as well. Mats had ended up on the floor too, and was busy swearing that next time he wouldn't leave Dortmund, or at least he was until Benedikt, who didn't want his lover to feel bad, made him remember they were rarely together at Dortmund. 

After all, it would have been strange if people had seen the Schalke's captain there too often. And so it made Mats reconsider his words, finally thinking he was happy to be here, even if it meant being subject to the evil duo's pranks.

Toni was the only one not involved in the whole kitchen mess, because he was the only one who had obeyed James' order when the young Colombian had told them to stop.

-Really, Lukas, Bastian and you couldn't have made this look more romantic and dramatic, even if you had wanted to. It's not like if we were going to kill you or something. Thomas laughed, amused by what he had heard them saying to each other.

-Speak for you. That's the second time I end up falling on a slippery floor today because of him and Bastian, so I won't promise anything. Mats retorted, and Benedikt too his hand in his gently to try to make him calm down.

Outside the kitchen, James was staring at the whole scene in disbelief.

-Please, someone tell me that this didn't happen again. He begged.

-I'm sorry, love. You know the proverb: history keeps on repeating itself. Toni sighed, taking James in his arms, but he didn't manage to keep him from staring at the floor of the kitchen he had tried so hard to get clean again. Now there was dirt and traces of footsteps everywhere. And as if it wasn't enough, Toni's gesture of kindness didn't even have the wanted effect.

-Toni, you're soaked! I don't know what happened, but I'm sure it's because of these damn prankers again. James exclaimed, getting away from his arms so he wouldn't get wet too.

He walked towards the seven members of the German NT present in the kitchen, looking very, very angry.

-Couldn't you just stop when I told you to? Look at what you have done! I spent hours cleaning, and now it's as though I have done nothing! And you....He growled, upset, getting nearer to Lukas.

-Okay, okay I admit it, this time it's my fault. I surrender! The Pole immediately said, not wanting to face James' wrath. He had never imagined that the young Colombian could be frightening, but right now, he was.

At the same moment, Philipp and Manuel came back, looking a bit disappointed.

-We didn't manage to catch Bastian. However, there is someone here with who I would like to talk about these stupid pranks. Philipp announced, looking anything but pleased, which didn't reassure Lukas. 

He really didn't want to face an angry Philipp and an angry James at the same time. And the other members of his team weren't going to be kind towards him, either. What was funny was that in the end, Marco and Mario, which were the ones him and Bastian had wanted to prank at first, were the only ones who didn't resent them. Life could be quite ironic sometimes.

-Is it too late to ask for peace? Lukas asked, trying to look as small and inoffensive as he could, which didn't really work well.

-You should have thought about this before getting into this mess. Now, you're going nowhere until you pay for what you have done. Philipp warned him, looking like a predator who had finally caught his pray.

-Sorry to interrupt you, Philipp, but since it is him and Bastian who messed up the kitchen this time, can he be the one to clean it too? I mean, I just finished my work when you all came here running after them. By the way, can someone explain me why you are all soaked? Is it raining outside, I thought this week-end was supposed to be sunny? James said, a little disappointed at the idea of being forced to stay inside the house until the rain would finally stop.  
Because he had thought about the fact that they were all soaked, and so he had gone for a more rational explanation than “it is because of the evil duo.” Despite knowing it was a really bad idea, Lukas couldn't help but laugh at James' remarks, which earned him an angry stare from Philipp.

-Oh, don't worry. Seeing what he has done to us, he can definitely clean that kitchen, until we come up with a better idea to punish him for pranking us. Because for your record, it is indeed sunny out there, and we wouldn't be soaked if the two idiot prankers didn't use hose garden to throw water at us. Philipp explained.

Okay, next time James wouldn't bother trying to find a rational explanation, then.

-Hey, don't call my Basti an idiot! He's a very clever man. And anyway you shouldn't have been involved in this, we only wanted to prank Mario and Marco, we thought it was them in the garden. Lukas protested, defending his lover no matter what. 

-You know you are not in a good position to talk? Mats asked him, and Lukas gulped, still remembering his threat from earlier. Meanwhile, Marco whispered in Mario's ear:

-You see, making out in that corridor was definitely one of the best idea we had.

It made Mario giggle happily, and he stole a kiss from the Dortmund player.

-And neither are you. Remember what we said about us having blackmail material against you? Don't you think that Bastian won't use it if he thinks you are taking revenge on me? He knows what is going on here anyway. Lukas answered to Mats, warning them all, knowing his lover would surely hear him through the micros, and so he would know what to do. His sake depended on it.

-How can you be so sure that he will think of it? I mean, right now all he must be thinking about is getting away from us. Mesut asked, puzzled.

Toni grabbed his phone, before sending to everyone, except of course Lukas and Bastian.

“The micros. I'm sure they put them all over the house. Lukas is telling Bastian what to do to know our next plans. Don't talk about this out loud, or he'll know that we know.”

-You are the best, Toni. James whispered in his ear, kissing him eagerly, not caring if he was getting wet by being so close to Toni. After all, his lover had kissed him when he was covered in spicy sauce. In comparison, water wasn't so bad.

-Fine, Lukas, we're not going to do anything to you for now, then. But we will try to find Bastian, and when it will be done, I'm sure you'll be less confident. Philipp warned him. 

Lukas was surprised Philipp had given up on his revenge so easily, and something told him his sudden change of attitude had something to do with the message he had gotten on his phone.

He hoped it was a good news of some kind which had made the former captain cheer up. But seeing the mischievous looks in Philipp's eyes, he could tell it unluckily for him wasn't the case.

He was right, because soon enough, the rest of the team received a message from their former captain, saying:

“Since we have Lukas here, let's take advantage of that to force him to show us where the damn micros are so we can get rid of them. Then, we won't have to worry about Bastian spying on us anymore. But we must not let Bastian know about it, of course, just like Toni said.” 

-That's so cool, I feel like a secret agent! Mario giggled quietly, and Marco smiled at how excited his boyfriend seemed to be.

They also decided communicating with Lukas with his phone would be too dangerous, in case he decided to use it to tell Bastian about their plan. So they took it away from him, before writing on a piece of paper what exactly they wanted him to do.

He tried to shout to warn his lover of what the rest of the team was up to, but all he managed to let out was:

-Bas...! Hmphhhhmphhhhhhhmphhhh.

As Thomas, who was expecting him to do so, put a hand over his mouth, keeping him silent.

-Oh no, you won't warn him, this is too much fun. He let out in a very low voice to be sure that Bastian wouldn't hear him.

-Good reflex, Thomas. Now, Lukas, you'd better show us where the micros are. Philipp warned him.

Lukas crossed his arms over his chest, making it clear that they wouldn't get anything out of him. He wasn't going to betray his lover, no matter what.

“Then maybe you should take a taste of your own medicine. How about eating some spicy flavoured Nutella?” Manuel wrote, a grin on his face, while Philipp smiled at his lover for finding a way to blackmail Lukas.

The prankster took the pen and paper from Manuel and wrote hastily:

“Alright, I'll help you. Please, don't force me to eat that!” 

-Miro, I need to do something. Can you take my place? Thomas asked his lover, thinking about his words so that Bastian would not be able to understand anything from them. 

Miroslav did as he was told, keeping Lukas from speaking, curious to see what Thomas needed to do.

The younger man used his phone, obviously taking a picture, before showing his phone to everyone, proud of what he had done.

-Take a look at what I sent to Bastian! He chuckled, obviously proud of what he had done.

He had taken a photo of a very angry Lukas, unable to speak, although it was impossible to determine whose hand was keeping him from doing it. Thomas wasn't stupid, he didn't want his Miro to become Bastian's main target.

Under the photo was written “We've got a war prisoner, you'd better stop your pranks if you don't want something to happen to him”, accompanied with a devil-like smiley.

-You know, Thomas, maybe this kind of threat is a little excessive. Miroslav intervened.

-I agree with Miro, Thomas. I find it a bit extreme. But you already sent it, so there's nothing we can do about it. Philipp sighed.

-You guys just don't know how to have fun. Thomas let out, pouting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you a lot for reading!^^  
> By the way, I just realized that it is the second of my stories in which someone keeps Lukas from talking...I swear I'm not doing this on purpose, it's happening on its own T_T


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,  
> sorry it took me so long to post this chapter, but my internet connexion stopped working for a while. Anyway I hope you'll like it :)

Bastian's hands turned into fists when he received the threat message from Thomas. However, he sure as hell wasn't going to obey him. Lukas had asked him to keep pranking their teammates, and it exactly what he was going to do, while trying to save his lover at the same time. If he was in his lover's situation, it's what he would want him to do.

And despite what Thomas had said, he was sure Lukas was safe as long as he had something to blackmail them all with. However, he hated not being able to hear Lukas through the micros anymore. Pranking other people was way more funny when they were doing it together, and he knew he would miss his advices for their plans, his evil grins when their pranks succeeded, his warm smiles when Bastian got them out of a complicated situations... But he could motivate himself imagining how he would make Lukas laugh with everything he was going to do to their teammates when they would be back together.

-You should stop being so smug about this, I'm going to take revenge on you and get my Lukas back! He hissed, even if no one was here to hear him. It just sounded cooler like that, and he was sure his lover would have agreed with him on this.

 

Despite what most of Die Mannschaft would have wanted, Lukas didn't tell them where the micros were right away. No, James forced him to clean the kitchen first, and despite Philipp trying to make him change his mind, he stood firm on his position. He didn't want the work to be left undone if the prankster managed to escape while searching for the micros.

And so Lukas was groaning, gagged and unable to talk properly, as he washed the floor under the eyes of his friends- who had stopped being friendly some time ago because of all their pranks. Each time he stopped, James showed him another stain he had missed. He had the feeling the young Colombian enjoyed making him suffer like this. Okay, after all he had made James go through, maybe he deserved it a little. But still, it was mean.

Toni used this time to send a message to Miroslav, knowing the older man would be pleased by the news he was going to tell him.

“Seeing how things went, I don't have any reason to keep you from eating outside with Thomas tonight. All you'll have to do is manage to leave without Philipp noticing it.”

Miroslav smiled when he received the message, immediately showing it to Thomas, who smiled widely too, and had to forced himself no to jump around happily, not wanting Philipp to notice how happy he suddenly was. He really wanted that dinner outside with his Miro, without any prankster around to ruin it. Finally, this day was going way better than planned, with Lukas captured, and now this.

“Can I just know why you didn't want us to leave in the first place? It makes me curious!” Thomas sent back, Miroslav reading what he was writing over his shoulder, chuckling lightly. Of course Thomas wanted to know about this, he wouldn't have expected any less from him. He couldn't keep himself from kissing his lover's cheek, finding him utterly adorable.

“Well, I ordered food for everyone for tonight, in replacement of the one that got wasted. Except that the food I bought for Lukas and Bastian was a bit...different. I wanted to act as if I had bought it as a forgiveness gift so that they would be forced to eat it, even though truth be told, it would have been more of a punishment for them. But if you had been there, they could have eaten your food instead, and so my plan would have failed. But now, seeing how we all are angry at them, making him eat that won't be that complicated. I can't wait to bring at least Lukas into trouble, and maybe Bastian too if we are lucky.” 

Thomas almost wanted to laugh when he received that message. So Toni could be evil when he wanted to, or rather when someone did bad things to James. Well, he could understand him, he would surely act in the same way if the evil duo had taken Miroslav as their victim of the moment.

“Please, tell me what kind of food it is! I mean, we won't be there to appreciate the joke tonight, and I promise I will not tell anyone, except for Miro, of course. I want to knooooow!” He answered almost immediately, eager to know everything about Toni's plan.

Toni rolled his eyes when he received the message. Thomas could really act like a child sometimes. From the amused smile on Miroslav's face, he could tell he had read Thomas' message too. Toni sighed, and decided he'd better explain everything to Thomas if he didn't want to be spammed with messages coming from his friend.

“Okay, it's food based on Nutella. Not only they wouldn't have liked it, but it would have given Manuel a reason to be mad at them too.” He explained.

“You know, I think fighting against Bastian and Lukas does no good to you. In the end, you are going to be as evil and twisted as them if you continue. But I like your plan, though. It sounds like fun. What kind of Nutella based recipe, though? I mean, it's weird for a main dish.” Thomas pointed out, confused

“Actually, I'm quite proud I found that one. It's Nutella pizza.” Toni wrote as Philipp began to look at them suspiciously, seeing Thomas and him on their phones looking like they were planning something big. He knew this could only mean trouble.

“That thing really exists? You know Philipp is going to get mad at you for making Manuel discover that, even if that's not your main goal.” Thomas pointed out.

“Oh, come on, knowing Manuel and his obsessions for Nutella, I'm sure he is already well aware of the existence of this dish. And it's not like if I wanted to offer it to him anyway.” Toni replied.

-What are you two planning? If you have an idea to get back at Lukas and Bastian, you should share it with everyone. Philipp intervened, his voice still very low.

Thomas had a hard time keeping his composure knowing what Toni had planned. However, the Real Madrid player's brain immediately began to work to find an acceptable excuse.

-Sorry, but we didn't want to bother you. You see, we were only talking about how we found the situation funny, and basically we were making fun of Lukas. We thought it wasn't worth sharing that with everyone. Toni explained, hoping Philipp would fall for it.

-You do know making fun of one of your teammates is certainly not acceptable, even if Lukas and Bastian have been quite annoying lately?...No, scratch the lately. But still, it's no way to behave, so stop that. I know their pranks are hard to support, but we shouldn't get on their level. Philipp scolded them.

-Yeah, riiight. Please, help me remember what you did to them after they stole Manuel's Nutella? Because you weren't at their level back then of course, not at all. Toni said ironically.

-It...It wasn't the same, they were worse back then! And anyway, how the hell did you learn about that? Philipp asked, curious.

-Please, tell me you're joking! You thought it was a secret or something? The whole team knows about it. Toni exclaimed, while Thomas tried to go back to Miroslav discreetly. Not discreetly enough apparently, because Philipp noticed it and understood what it meant.

-Thomas! I thought you and Miro wouldn't tell anyone! You promised! Philipp complained, this time completely forgetting he had to be silent. This wasn't going to make their plan fail anyway, and it was really a shock for him.

-Oh come on, you really thought I was going to keep such funny events to myself? Sorry, but I'm not that selfish. Thomas answered.

-That's right, I had forgotten you were such a child. My mistake. Philipp sighed, looking somehow desperate.

-To be honest, Thomas wasn't the only one guilty of talking too much. Miroslav admitted, looking down.

-Maybe, but it's him who has a bad influence on you, so somehow it's still because of him. But you know what, I'm not even going to bother getting mad about this. The former captain of Die Mannschaft let out.

-Will you stop stressing my Fips? Manuel intervened, wrapping a possessive arm around his lover's waist, and Philipp happily leaned against him, glad to have him by his side.

-Well, we can't really have fun stressing Lukas, since James is already taking care of that. Thomas pouted, but still making sure that Bastian woudn't be able to hear anything concerning their prisonner.

-Do I really have to repeat again that wanting to stress out one of your teammates is not okay? Philipp hissed, and James, who was listening to the conversation from afar, couldn't help thinking that if he was listening to them right now, Bastian was surely laughing outloud from the bits of conversation he could catch, with Philipp being so annoyed and forgetting to talk quietly because of it..

-And do I have to talk about the Nutella incident ag...Thomas began , but he didn't have time to finish before Philipp stopped him.

-Stop! I don't want to hear you talking about that damn Nutella incident again! Just stop with that. Philipp hissed.

-Nutella? What happened with Nutella? Manuel immediately asked, interested and worried at the same time. 

-Nothing, Thomas just decided to be childish. Don't worry your Nutella is safe. Philipp groaned.

-You should stop that. If we want to trap Bastian, we should be united, not always arguing! Mario suddenly intervened in the conversation, surprising them both.

-Why are you staring at me like that? It's not because I'm young that I can't say something that makes sense. He added.

-Sorry, Mario, it's not that, it's just...Philipp began, but it was Thomas who said what they were all thinking outloud.

-We were expecting you to be cuddling with Marco, you know, since you guys can't see each other often and are not really involved in the whole “Schweinski hunt” thing since you weren't pranked. So we didn't think you would care about this. Not that it bothers us, we will need all the help available. Thomas whispered.

-Lukas and Bastian wanted to prank us, even if they failed, so we are definitely involved in this. And Marco and me don't cuddle that much! Mario protested.

They all had a knowing look on their faces, as if saying “yeah, suuuure”, but Mario chose to ignore it. Alright, maybe him and Marco couldn't stopped touching each other when they were together, but they had the excuse of being separated most of the time, while some of the couples who were together almost all the time weren't really better than them. 

He just had to look at Manuel who was gently stroking Philipp's side to make him calm down, or at James who, despite making sure Lukas cleaned the floor correctly, kept coming close to Toni to whisper something in his ear or to kiss him. So no, him and Marco definitely weren't the worst, he was convinced of that.

-Come on, I think this kitchen looks clean enough. We'd better begin to look for the micros. Mats told James, still making sure Bastian wouldn't catch a single word of their conversation. It was obvious that he was eager to have his revenge on the evil duo for what they had done.

-You must be right, I guess. Forcing him to do this chore was fun, though. Sorry if I overdid it. James apologised.

-I'm sure Mats can understand you. I mean, we all have at least one reason to get back at Lukas and Bastian, and I have to say I enjoyed watching him cleaning like this. He deserved it. Anyway, I'm going to warn everyone. Toni intervened, coming to his boyfriend's side.

“It's time to search for the micros!” He wrote, sending the message to everyone. 

“Write where all the micros are hidden on this paper. We will separate to look for them.” Toni then told Lukas, using a piece of paper again.

The prankster was obviously reluctant to do it, but he changed his mind after Mats shoved the spicy Nutella jar in front of his face. He really hoped Bastian would be able to beat them all without much help.

They began their work by getting rid of the micros in the kitchen, which were placed under the sink and behind the fridge- James couldn't help but think that they hardly would have managed to find them without Lukas' indications.

“Even if we got rid of these micros, stay careful. Knowing Lukas, maybe there are ones he didn't tell us about.” Mesut warned them. He had spent enough time with the prankster at Arsenal and in the German NT to know what he was capable of. Sami looked proudly at his lover for thinking of it.

“You are right, let's keep that in mind. I suggest that James and I take care of the hall, Manuel and Philipp of the living room, Thomas and Miro of the living-room, Mesut and Sami of the bathroom- I can't believe they put micros there too-, Benedikt and Mats of the corridor downstairs and Mario and Marco of the corridor upstairs. What do you think?” Toni proposed.

“That's fine with me. We still need to decide who will take Lukas with them to make sure he doesn't escape.” Philipp quickly replied.

“I'm sure Miro and I can do it! It sounds like fun!” Thomas intervened, not really convincing Philipp.

“I will make sure this goes well, don't worry. You can trust me, Lukas won't go anywhere alone” Miroslav told his former captain, wanting to please Thomas.

“Fine, but you'd better be careful. We all know he will use any occasion to run away or to lead you to false conclusions concerning his and Bastian plans.” Philipp reminded them.

“If everything is settled, then I think we can go.” Benedikt wrote, and they all agreed with him. He took a look at Mats, who was still upset. He was decided to use their time alone to make him feel better.

They all left, leaving the kitchen empty. They didn't notice the grin on Lukas' face. If they thought they were the only ones who could communicate without other people knowing, then they were wrong. Prisoner or not, he would do everything to help his Basti.

Bastian had guessed something was up with his teammates. He could only hear half of their conversations through his micros, and sometimes he heard people speaking but not loud enough for him to hear. It wasn't hard to deduce from that that the the others surely knew he was listening to them.

He had the confirmation of it when the micros in the kitchen stopped functioning, but he could still hear what was happening there thanks to the micros of the corridor, which weren't so far away. From the sound of footsteps, he could tell the moment when they all left the kitchen. And so he decided to go there. He knew Lukas, his lover and partner and crime would have tried to let some clues behind him to let him know what was going on.

And honestly, he was glad to actually stop hiding in one of the trees of the garden. He got down, checking twice that no one was around. And then he ran through the garden, still making sure he was alone. He almost felt like a secret agent or a criminal running away from the police, and he really would have appreciated it, if only Lukas had been with him.

He miraculously managed to get inside of the house without anyone noticing.- The miracle being that Benedikt had been too busy kissing Mats to make him forget how he had fallen twice today to notice him. Bastian stopped in front of the kitchen, noticing how wet the floor was. He took off his shoes to make sure he wouldn't leave marks. He didn't want the others to know he had been here. 

Maybe it was a waste of time, but he thoroughly looked for any clue Lukas could have let behind him. He was beginning to lose hope when he noticed that the door of one of the cupboards near the floor was slightly opened. He looked inside, and finally found what he had been looking for.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I'm back!
> 
> First, I'm sorry for being gone for more than a year. I had some personal problems and so I didn't have much time to write anymore. ^^'   
> Thanks to everyone who left comments or kudos, as always :) I hope you will all like this chapter ^^

“I'm soooo happy we will finally have that dinner together, Miro ! I just can't wait!” Thomas said happily after they separated from the others, a huge grin on his face. Miroslav could only smile too at seeing him like that. It was a good thing they could carry on with their original plans without upsetting Toni. As much as he appreciated the rest of the team, he didn't want to waste what little time he had with Thomas.

“So am I. But I'm sure you already know that. I would spend every moment with you if I could.” Miroslav replied, and he wasn't surprised at all when Thomas stopped walking in direction of the dining room, throwing himself in his arms and kissing him without a second thought.

“I love you so much, of only you knew! Although I still don't know how you manage to make great declarations like that to me as if it was nothing, being so composed and stuff. I don't know how to do that, I can't be calm like you.” Thomas whined, even though it wasn't really that big of a deal for him. What mattered was that Miro knew he loved him, no matter how he said it. But still, it had picked his curiosity.

“But that's why we fit so well together, don't we? I make you calm down when you need to, and you help me to be bolder. And if you want to know, I really like how outgoing you are each time you tell me how you feel. So don't change that.” Miroslav explained to him, looking amused by the younger player.

“Oh, Miro, I love you so much!” Thomas exclaimed, kissing him once more, not caring that he had already say that just a few seconds ago. It made Miroslav chuckle, since it showed just how reckless Thomas was.. “It's so cool we're together, and it's even cooler we're going to beat Bastian at his own game, then go to a restaurant to celebrate our victory!”

“Not so loud!” Miroslav scolded him gently, and Thomas immediately lowered his eyes and his voice.

“Right, sorry, I almost forgot about that for a second. What can I say, it's not my fault you can make me forget everything that isn't you. But let's get to work now! To the dining room!” Thomas decided, more enthusiastic than ever.

Lukas rolled his eyes at the scene, still gagged and unable to say anything understandable. He had first thought about trying to take advantage of the situation to try to run away while his friends were busy declaring their undying love to each other, but then he had spotted Miroslav's stare, which didn't leave him even while he was talking to Thomas, and concluded that he didn't have much chance of success. 

He would have to wait for a better occasion, then. If he was lucky, maybe Miroslav would let his guard down at a moment or another. But even if he didn't, Lukas knew he could count on Bastian, especially since his lover had a little advantage on all the others. All thanks to him.

Of course, helping Bastian hadn't been easy, and for a moment he had thought he wouldn't be able to do it. But his friends' mistake had been to give him a paper and a pen so he could communicate with them without having Bastian learning about it. While they were arguing, he had ripped away a small piece of the sheet he had been given, and he had managed to make them forget about the pen as well. 

They had been distracted enough for him to draw a quick plan of the house- which surely didn't look much like a plan, but his Basti was intelligent and he was sure he would manage to understand it- and to indicate where each of the couples decided to go in order to remove the micros. He hoped that with this piece of information in his hands, Bastian would be able to come out with something great. At least, Lukas believed in him with all his heart.

“I think a certain prisoner here looks a little too satisfied with himself.” Thomas realized just as they entered the dining room, noticing how happy and sure of himself his teamate looked, despite being gagged and forced to follow them. “He shouldn't be acting like that, right, Miro?” Thomas asked his lover. Miroslav smiled a little at that, finding it adorable that Thomas always came to him to confirm that he was right, even when he obviously was.

“Indeed. He surely has something planned out with Bastian, as always. Or maybe he is just too sure that they're stronger than us. Anyway, we'll need to stay careful. Who knows what they're going to come up with next? We'll just have to stay ready for anything.” The older man advised him.

“This is so exciting, It's like if we were in some adventure movie, trying to defeat the bad guys. I don't think I'll ever get bored of it. But we can't waste time, we don't want to give Bastian an advantage! Let's put our plan into action!” Thomas concluded before reaching the place where the first micro of their list was hidden.

At first, it wasn't too difficult, and if they didn't manage to find it, they could always look at Lukas threateningly so that he would help them. Of course, the prankster was always reluctant to accept, but Thomas came up with quite original threats, and managed to look way more dangerous than Miroslav had ever believed he was capable of being, and so in the end it it all worked out. 

Even though Miroslav was almost sure that Thomas never would have actually locked Lukas in the basement of the house until the end of the week-end, or any other threats like that. His boyfriend couldn't really be that evil when he wanted to, right? Happy, outgoing Thomas couldn't really put this into action?

But apparently, Lukas wasn't so sure of that, since he obeyed Thomas order. Afterward, Thomas winked at Miroslav, confirming the act that his threats were indeed empty, reassuring him. But at the same time, he was proud of his boyfriend. If Miroslav himself almost fell for it, it was no surprise Lukas believed him. But for a moment, Miroslav also hoped that Thomas had been quiet enough while threatening Lukas, or else he had the feeling they would become the first on Bastian list of “people who need to be pranked”.

Then, the real trouble began when they began taking care of the micros placed near the roof. Despite Miroslav and Thomas being both quite tall, they were some they just didn't manage to reach. 

“Did you really have to put them so high?” Muttered Thomas, trying to reach one of the devices, in vain.

As an answer, Lukas raised an eyebrow, as if he wanted to say “Keeping you from seeing them and taking them off was the general idea, so don't expect me to be sorry for you.” If he had been able to talk, he surely wouldn't have passed on the chance to make fun of Thomas and Miroslav. Well, that wasn't totally true. He first would have told Bastian everything he knew, and only then he would have make fun of Thomas and Miroslav.

“Looks like we will to have to do this together, Miro. I'm going to hold you up, and you'll take care of the rest, okay?” Suggested Thomas. This idea made the younger one less grumpy about the micros being so difficult to reach. Being able to hold his Miro in his arms certainly wasn't something that would upset him.

He smiled brightly at Miroslav, waiting for his answer. The older one, however, didn't look as thrilled as him by that idea and was obviously trying to find an excuse.

“Are you sure you can't get it?” He asked Thomas once more, even though it was obvious that his lover couldn't do it.

“No, I already tried and it didn't work. Come on Miro, help me.” Thomas urged him, already opening his arms so he could lift him and allow him to get rid of the last micros left.

When Miroslav didn't come to him, he frowned, not understanding his reaction. Despite not being able to talk, Lukas was laughing at seeing this, and wasn't very discreet about it, which didn't help Thomas to stay calm.

“What the hell is so funny about this?” He asked him, not being happy at all. Without thinking about the consequences, he let Lukas speak again, wanting to understand what the hell was happening. Not to talk about the fact that he was definitely upset that Lukas could understand something about Miroslav that he couldn't.

Of course, Lukas could have used it to give Bastian some clues, but he was enjoying this situation way too much to do that. Instead of what he kept on laughing, before finally letting out:

“Don't tell me that the great and wise Miroslav is afraid of heights.” 

At these words, Miroslav looked away, clearly embarrassed by Lukas' word. It was enough for the prankster to begin laughing again. Well, until Thomas gagged him once more a minute later, since he now had the information he needed. After doing that, Thomas faced Miroslav, incomprehension in his eyes.

“But...you didn't say anything! How can I not know this?” Thomas asked, clearly not as amused at Lukas.

“Well, it's not really the kind of thing you shout out for everyone to hear.” Miroslav tried to explain.

“I'm not everyone.” Thomas pouted. “But then, why aren't you afraid when we need to go somewhere by plane with the team? I mean, I think I would have noticed something like that!”

“It's not the same, I have something under my feet, then. And don't tell me it's not logical, I know it isn't, okay?” Miroslav sighed, not happy that in the end it came to this.

“And you don't even trust me? You know I wouldn't let you fall!” Thomas promised, hope in his eyes. For a moment, Miroslav though about refusing. He could always ask Thomas to take care of the micros himself. But he saw the sparkles in his boyfriend's eyes at the idea that it was something that Miroslav would only trust him with, and no one else.

And he hated to disappoint Thomas. And he didn't forget that Lukas was still here, and he could already hear the other man making fun of him, spreading rumors among the players of the German NT of how he couldn't even climb on Thomas' shoulders without being afraid, ruining his reputation with it. Probably by associating it with his age, too. So he was decided to prove him wrong before he could say anything like that.

“Okay, you can do it. But if you drop me, you're dead.” He hissed, but Thomas took it well, seeing how tensed his Miro was. He knew Miroslav didn't want to be harsh with him, he was obviously just afraid. He was happy that his lover really did trust him, but it made him feel a little selfish was almost forcing him to do it.

“Hey, if you don't want to do it, you don't have to, Miro. I was just a little surprised there was something I didn't know about you, so I got carried away, but after thinking about it, it's not such a big deal. It's even kind of cute, actually. You could lift me if you want, it would work out just as well.” Thomas assured him.

For a second, Miroslav was tempted to accept, but then he noticed Lukas' mocking stare and he decided that he would do this, even if it was just to prove to himself that he was capable of it.

“No, I can do it. I know nothing can happen to me if it's you doing it with me.” He assured Thomas, and he was rewarded again with another kiss from his lover, a childish smile appearing on Thomas' face.

“Okay, let's do it then!” The younger man declared.

 

 

In the living room, Philipp and Manuel didn't have the same problems. On the contrary, everything went smoothly for them, and they were almost done taking all the micros off the walls. Well, not only the walls, since Lukas and Bastian had actually been quite inventive while deciding where to hide them. In the curtains, behind a calendar, under a chair...The list was almost endless. And what made it worse was that they weren't even sure Lukas had told them everything.

The fact that Philipp was here had obviously helped with the matter, since he didn't let Manuel or himself be distracted with other things. Even though he loved the goalkeeper with all his heart, he could actually resist making out with him when something important was at stake. And finding out what Bastian and Lukas had turned his team into was definitely very important to him.

“Who do you think Bastian will try to prank first?” Manuel asked him as they were almost done. The ex-captain thought for a second, before answering.

“Maybe Thomas, I mean, it's him who sent that picture of Lukas to him, after all. Or Marco and Mario, since they were the ones they wanted to prank as first. Or maybe James, since he is the last one they met. Or maybe Bastian is expecting us to think like that and will go after someone completely unexpected. You can't really know with him. It doesn't change the fact that we need to be careful.” Philipp advised him, looking as serious as ever. Manuel nodded, smiling at how determined his lover seemed to solve this problem.

“I think it was the last one. What do you think we need to do now?” Manuel wanted to know. To be honest, he was a little surprised that this went so well. He was almost expecting Bastian to suddenly appear at every corner of the room, an evil scheme in mind.

“Maybe we should go with Thomas and Miroslav, since Lukas is with him. I'll do everything I can to make sure him and Bastian stop messing with my team. National duty is supposed to be taken seriously!” Philipp declared, and once more Manuel smiled fondly at him. It was quite endearing, how Philipp still cared so much about Die Mannschaft, even after his retirement.

That's when they heard a weird buzzing. They tried to find where it came from, until finally they discovered a radio, almost hidden behind the curtains. What they didn't notice, however, was that the window behind it wasn't completely closed. If they had listened more closely, they would have been able to hear someone leaving. But they didn't.

“It's nothing. Let's go” Philipp declared once they understood what this was all about. But before Manuel followed him, the radio went on, and a feminine voice let out:

“Good afternoon everyone. Here are today's news. The CEO of the company producing Nutella announced today that financial difficulties due to the economic crises is forcing him to put an end to the production of the famous chocolate paste. Many customers all over the world are already expressing their incomprehension and sadness at this sudden...”

The journalist kept on talking, but Manuel didn't listen to her anymore, his eyes wide with desperation. Then he stared at Philipp, and looked even more hurt than before, realization hitting him.

“You knew!” He exclaimed, pointing an accusative finger at him.

“I knew what?” Philipp asked, confused in the sudden change in his lover's attitude. He hadn't really been listening to what the radio had said, still focused on the next step to put an end to Bastian and Lukas' mischief.

“You knew that they had stopped producing Nutella! So that's the “Nutella incident” you had been talking about with Thomas. Why didn't you tell me?” Manuel whimpered, feeling sad and betrayed. How could his Fips keep something so important from him? Or maybe he was actually happy this was happening? Slowly, anger began to fill Manuel's mind.

“What? Of course I didn't know! And even if I had, it wouldn't change anything.” Philipp defended himself, not understanding his lover's sudden outburst.

“It wouldn't change anything? Of course it could have changed something! If I had known this sooner, I could have bought all the Nutella I could before it was all sold out! But now it's too late...” Manuel let out, slowly realizing what it all meant.

“I'm sorry for you, but I have nothing to do with this. Thomas and I were just talking about the time Lukas and Bastian stole your Nutella. But let's see the bright side of life, at least you'll be able to have a healthy way of life, now.” Philipp shrugged, obviously way less traumatized by this news than Manuel was. But his lover definitely didn't like his reaction.

“How can you say that? I'm feeling bad, and the only thing you find to say is that you're happy I'll never have Nutella again? How can you be so cold hearted, Fips? Well if that's how you're taking it, you'll just have to deal with Bastian and Lukas alone!” Manuel almost shouted, before leaving, and Philipp only then realized that maybe he shouldn't have been so harsh with his lover.

“Manuel! Wait! I didn't want to hurt you!” The ex-captain exclaimed, running after him. He got a glance of his lover face, and asked in bewilderment, almost face-palming at it. “Manuel, don't tell me you're crying over Nutella!”

 

 

Hidden in the garden, this time behind a hedge, Bastian was congratulating himself for his prank. Now that he knew where each of his friends had decided to go, he knew that it was a safe place. His only regret was that Lukas wasn't here to celebrate it with him. He was quite proud of this one. 

He had been lucky to remember there was a radio in the living room, and chance had been on his side again when he had discovered that the window had been left open, and so he didn't have to go through the whole house to reach it. Putting a micro behind it, this time not to listen to the others, but to make them listen to something, had been easy from there.

The hardest had been to modify his voice in the right way, so that it would look credible, but he had finally managed to do it. After all, he and Lukas had come here prepared to do as many pranks as they could in a short time. It wasn't that often they had so many possible victims.

Now all he could do was hope that Manuel would fall into that trap. But honestly, he didn't have too many doubts about it; the goalkeeper rarely took time to think things through when Nutella was involved. He was almost sure they would have lost the world cup if one of their opponents had found a way to bring a jar of it on the field.

However, Bastian wasn't going to wait for the results of his prank. Manuel and Philipp weren't the only ones working against him, if he believed the clues Lukas had left behind him. He didn't have time to wait, there were other pranks he needed to prepare...

 

Toni and James high-fived as they got rid of the last micro, well hidden under a carpet in the hall, rejoicing to finally have some time to spend together. Of course, they would have to reach to meet with the others soon to know if they had been as successful as them, but for now they could relax for a few minutes.

“I didn't think it would be that easy. I was almost convinced it would be a trap. Let's hope finding Bastian will be just as easy.” James said.

Toni, on his side, didn't look as optimistic. Even though he was glad nothing bad had happened to them, he knew Bastian and Lukas, and had the feeling something was wrong.

“We shouldn't rejoice too soon. You know, knowing them, this is only the beginning. I have the feeling the worst is still yet to come.” He warned his lover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, and for sticking with this story despite my long absence :)


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!  
> Germany's win last night helped me to find inspiration to get this chapter done, so here it is! I hope you'll enjoy it  
> By the way, I now have a tumblr: http://noarleen.tumblr.com and you can still find me on Twitter: @Noarleen  
> Thanks again for all the love, comments and kudos, it means a lot :)

“Miro, I really love you, but if you keep doing that, you're going to strangle me.” Thomas warned his lover, coughing a little because of the lack of air. “Let go a little.” He pleaded, really hoping that his Miro would listen to his demand.

Miroslav had climbed on his shoulders, and he was now taking care of the last micros, the higher placed ones. But his fear of falling was still present, and so he had instinctively wrapped his legs around Thomas' shoulders and neck. They would surely fell together if he lost his balance anyway, but still, that reassured him. But his grip was actually becoming a little too tight for the younger man's liking.

“I can't.” Miroslav muttered, trying not to sound as panicked as he really was to save what was left of his pride. What had gone through his mind, again, accepting to do that even after Thomas had offered to do it in his place? All that because of his stupid pride- which he was actually losing right now- and his will to prove Lukas' wrong...And he was supposed to be the wisest man of the team...Maybe his teamates really had a bad influence on his after all.

As for Lukas, he was busy laughing at the scene, looking less and less upset to be their prisoner, because that was almost as funny as pranking them. He would come back with some great stories to tell Bastian, he just couldn't wait to be reunited with him again. He only regretted not being able to take a photo to immortalize this moment. This could have been a source of endless blackmail...And of endless good laughs too!

“And you, stop laughing! This isn't funny at all!” Miroslav exclaimed, not liking being made fun of like that. Needless to say, Lukas wasn't that eager to obey him. Especially since Miroslav didn't really look like a figure of authority right now.

“Miro, you know that if I faint because I don't have enough oxygen, you're going to fall too anyway, right?” Thomas tried to reason his lover, taking his calmest voice, wanting to sound as reassuring as possible. 

The realization hit Miroslav, who held a little less tightly unto his lover, even though he still wasn't looking reassured at all. He gritted his teeth, trying to concentrate on the micros and not on the distance separating him from the ground. He knew he should trust Thomas, but this wasn't exactly a rational kind of fear.

“By the way, Lukas, I've got my eyes on you, so don't even think about making me and my Miro fall.” Thomas added, glaring at the prankster, which didn't really help to comfort Miroslav.

Deception passed through Lukas' stare, even though Thomas couldn't tell if it was because the prankster was angry at himself for not thinking about doing it first, or because he had actually planned to do so and his intentions had been discovered. Either way, Thomas was glad he had thought about it. He had the feeling that if his Miro was to fall after he promised him he wouldn't, he would be into huge troubles.

“If you do anything like that, you're a dead man, Lukas.” Agreed Miroslav, and the prankster could tell from the tone he was using that the other Pole wasn't joking on this one. So he decided that making fun of him while Miroslav struggled to remove the micros would be enough. He knew when he shouldn't push his luck.

“That's it. That was the last one.” Miroslav announced, relievement in his voice, promising himself that he was never doing anything like that ever again. He had proved to himself that he could do it once, that was enough.

“You've done great, Miro. Time to get down, now.” Thomas announced. He wasn't, however, expecting what was to come next.

“I can't.” Miroslav let out, not sounding as relieved as before, his fingers digging in Thomas' shoulders.

“What's the problem now?” Thomas sighed. Even though he couldn't deny that his Miro being afraid of heights was kinda adorable, he would have felt better if it didn't involve his lover almost murdering him accidentally.

“It's too high.” His lover simply said, definitely ashamed and not happy at all to show his weaknesses so easily. And of course Lukas wasn't making any of it easier, looking as if he was going to die of laughter. Miroslav silently promised himself to find a way to get revenge on him afterward.

“Really Miro? You don't have any problem doing somersault celebrations, but you can't get down my shoulders? Come on, I'm sure you can do it!” Thomas encouraged him.

Miroslav kinda looked like a cat who were afraid to jump off a tree. Thomas was looking at him with expectation, and he knew that if he wanted to save his reputation, then he'd better manage to do it. But that didn't make the task any less frightening.

“It's not the same...” He muttered. “Okay, I'm going to do it, but if I get hurt, it's your fault.” He told Thomas. His lover ignored just how childish that last statement was, and kept on encouraging Miroslav.

“Don't worry, Miro, it's gonna be fine. And even if something was to happen, you know I'd be there to take care of you.” Thomas assured him, a bright smile on his face. That was enough for the older man to find enough courage to finally jump and reach the ground.

“See, that wasn't so hard!” Thomas said, just as he took him in his arm, kissing his cheek lovingly. Miroslav hugged him back as if his life depended on it, really happy to be back on the ground. He began making out with Thomas, not caring about the fact that Lukas was still there, and that he actually was protesting, not really wanting to witness it.

But they soon parted as they heard footsteps coming their way from one of the other rooms.

“Ah, it looks like someone else is done with the micros too!” Thomas realized.

 

“And here it is! I think it is actually the last one of the list.” Mesut announced happily before turning to Sami, looking quite proud of what they have achieved.

Seeing that look on his lover's face was enough to make Sami's heart beat faster. He had missed the other man so much, and now he is so glad to be reunited with him once again. If he didn't have obligations towards his club, he would surely spend all his days like that, being near his Mesut, taking care of him.

“Well done.” Sami congratulated him, hoping the tone of his voice could convey everything he felt, could show Mesut just how much he loved him.

“What should we do now? Go help someone else with the micros?” Mesut suggested, while checking the list Lukas had been forced to make for them one last time.

He definitely didn't want to give Bastian an advantage because they had been careless. He didn't want to be the one who would put the rest of the team in a difficult situation.

As he was doing that, Sami wrapped his arms around him from behind, really determined to make the better out of the time he still had left with him, before whispering in his ear:

“Or maybe we could use some time together. It's been way too long since we last had the occasion to be alone, just the two of us, Mes.” 

Mesut was surprised, not expecting that, but it didn't take him long to get seduced by that idea. He couldn't deny he had missed Sami, too. But he tried to be the responsible one, and to make Sami go back to reality.

“Maybe, but the rest of the team counts on us to help them make sure that Bastian won't prank us anymore. We can't just leave them alone like that.” He argued, even though he wanted nothing else than for Sami to convince him otherwise.

“But we already did what they asked of us, right? As long as there are no more micros here, our job is done. And as you said it, Bastian could still prank us later. So we should enjoy the moment while we're still able to do so, don't you think?” Sami pointed out, hoping he would manage to make Mesut change his mind.

Mesut turned around so that he would be able to face Sami. After doing it, he didn't miss the sparkle in the other man's eyes. H really didn't have the courage to resist him, it seemed. He crossed his arms, an amused smile on his face, and asked:

“What do you have on your mind, exactly?”

“Well, we're in a bathroom, with a shower. I'm sure we could figure something out.” Sami winked at him, caressing his lover's cheek and making Mesut bush slightly.

“Are you sure? I mean, the others could decide to go look for us, or Bastian could still try to prank us.” Mesut reminded him, even though he had to admit he was definitely interested by his boyfriend's proposition. More than interested, in fact. He was one step away from pushing Sami into that shower box and turning what his lover had implied into reality.

“We'll just have to lock the door. And I'm almost sure we're not the first ones on Bastian's list of who he actually wants to prank. Not to talk about the fact that he is surely working on a way to free Lukas right now, and that happily for us, we're not the ones in charge of him. So what do you say?” Sami exposed.

Mesut decided that finally, he didn't like being the responsible one, so he pulled Sami closer, locking their lips. He had been waiting way too long for this.

 

Bastian was, once again, thankful that Lukas had managed to help him. It hadn't taken him long to understand that the rest of the team had finally learned about the micros, and that they were getting rid of it at the moment. And if they were some rooms in which all the micros had stopped functioning, Lukas apparently didn't give them all the locations of the devices. And it so happened that there were one left in the bathroom.

Once he understood what Mesut and Sami were up too, Bastian quickly stopped listening, not wanting to have mental images of his teamates doing things to each other stuck on his mind forever. He was almost considering going to prank someone else, but he didn't really like that option. Sami had sounded so sure they wouldn't be the ones being pranked that Bastian absolutely wanted to prove him wrong now. He had to make sure that his and Lukas' reputation of pranksters would stay intact, after all!

And that's when he finally had an idea he could use. It involved getting into the house, but he was almost sure that it wouldn't be a problem if he was careful enough. And it turned out he was right. The living room wasn't a complicated to go through since Manuel and Philipp had left it just a few minutes ago.

As he went to the corridor, he heard Mats and Benedikt talking to each other, but Mats was too busy ranting about how he was going to make Lukas and him pay for what had happened, and Benedikt trying to calm him down, for them to actually notice his presence. Bastian took a mental note of taking care of them later. No one threatened his lover and stayed unpunished.

However, he did hear Manuel muttering something about Nutella from afar, sounding depressed, and he smirked, knowing he would be able to get to the next step of his plan soon enough. But first, he was going to make sure Mesut and Sami wouldn't think they could mess with him anymore.

He finally found what he was looking for: the water heater which, luckily for him, was outside of the bathroom. He was going to have some fun now...

 

Loud screams resonated through the house, and everyone nearby stopped what they were doing, seriously wondering if someone had been hurt or something. Mats and Benedikt looked at each other, wondering what was the origin of the sound. They were even more surprised when a door opened just in front of them, Mesut and Sami rushing out of the bathroom, completely drenched, obviously freezing and only wearing towels around their waists. 

They immediately began running towards their own rooms, surely to put some warm clothes on. Benedikt looked at Mats, incomprehension in his eyes.

“Do you have any idea what the hell just happened?” He asked his lover, wondering if he had been dreaming of if this had really happened.

“If I had to guess, I'd say it has something to do with Bastian. Again.” Mats sighed, looking suspiciously around them, just in case the prankster was still nearby, ready to strike again. He wanted to be ready to protect his Beni if something like that had to happen. If he wanted to do something to his lover, Bastian would have to get rid of him first.

“And me who thought this would be a peaceful week-end.” The Schalke player regretted.

Mats looked fondly at Benedikt, the anger he held for Bastian temporarily forgotten, touched by how innocent his lover could be sometimes.

“Because after all this time, you still believe that “peaceful” and “national team gathering” can go together? I thought you were more lucid than that.” Mats teased him gently.

“What do you want, I'm an optimistic person.” Benedikt shrugged. “But you are sure you don't want to know what happened with Sami and Mesut? I'm curious now.” He added.

“Oh no, we're not getting involved in this. If Bastian isn't done with them yet, I don't want to you to end up involved in one of his pranks. You know how fast rumors spread within the team anyway; you'll know everything about it soon enough.” Mats decided to reason him.

“I guess you're right. Still, I can't wait to know what this was all about.” Benedikt told him.

“So you think learning about the gossips of the team is more interesting than spending time with me? You're going to hurt me, you know.” Mats joked.

“You know this isn't true. Nothing's better than being with you.” Benedikt replied, taking Mats' hand in his.

 

Bastian was still laughing. He definitely had a great idea, turning the water of the shower extremely warm, then suddenly extremely cold. That should definitely teach Mesut and Sami not to underestimate him... And as if it wasn't enough, he now had the proof that Manuel had believed the whole Nutella-not-being-produced-anymore story he had come up with. Things couldn't be any better...

Well, that wasn't completely true; Lukas could still be by his side, and right now they could have been making out while laughing at their friends' expanse. But considering their situation, things were going well. So well that Bastian could even imagine getting his Poldi back soon enough...

 

“Manuel, please listen to me! I'm sorry you're feeling so sad- even if I don't really understand well why- but I promise you I didn't know about it!” Philipp repeated himself for what felt like the hundredth time for him, hoping that it would be the right one and that Manuel would finally believe him. Were they really fighting over something that stupid? 

Manuel had apparently decided to completely ignore him, but Philipp was having none of it. He grabbed his hand, forcing the goalkeeper to stop walking. He was not going to let something like that come between him and Manuel! He loved the goalkeeper way too much for that...

“Look at me! I did not know about it, I'm ready to swear it on anything you want!” He exclaimed.

For a moment, Manuel hesitated, before finally replying:

“Even on your world champion title?”

“Yes, even on that.” Philipp promised.

“And on the harmony of the team?” Manuel inquired again, since he had had the chance to witness more than once today just how important it actually was for his lover.

“Yes, on the harmony of the team too.” Philipp sighed, wondering for how long this would have to go on.

“And on Muesli too?” The goalkeeper finally asked.

“Yes, on...Are you really being serious? You actually think I would promise something on our team and our world cup title, and not on Muesli? Really?” Philipp said, surprised. “Of course, even on Muesli! How many times to I need to tell you, I was just talking about that time Bastian and Lukas stole your Nutella, and how we got revenge on them? Just like we're going to get revenge on them now too, actually. How hard is it to understand?”

“I'm sorry, Philipp, I shouldn't have doubted you. It's just...It's a really hard time for me right now, you know?” Manuel let out, and even though Philipp couldn't believe that Manuel was actually so sad because of something like that, he couldn't deny what was in front of him. That is to say a Manuel who was obviously fighting against tears.

“Come on, Manuel, it's not as if someone had died.” Philipp said, wondering how the hell you could comfort someone who was crying over Nutella.

“You can't understand what I'm feeling.” Manuel answered, looking away.

Philipp decided to ignore just how ridiculous this whole situation was and took the goalkeeper in his arms, holding him close and gently caressing his back, hoping this was what the taller man needed.

“Maybe you're right, I don't really understand, but I don't like seeing you in this state. You know me, and so you know I'm saying the truth, Manu.” He whispered, doing his best to sound concerned, even if deep down, he was rejoicing for his lover's health, and over the fact that he finally wouldn't have to fight with him about Nutella anymore.

“Yeah, I know, Fips. Thank you. And sorry again for doubting you.” Manuel recognized, embracing his lover back.

Philipp sighed in contentment, glad that they solved this fight quite easily. He definitely didn't like it when things went wrong between Manuel and him. Now, he somehow couldn't picture his life without the goalkeeper. Too many things had changed, mostly for the better, since he had begun dating him. 

“I love you, and I don't want us to fight because of something like that. Maybe you don't have Nutella anymore, but you still got me.” Philipp told him gently. 

He was really hoping that Manuel wasn't going to retort that Nutella was as important as him, because he would surely lose it. But Manuel didn't give him an answer, because at the same time, the goalkeeper's phone rang. Philipp let go of Manuel so that he could check it. The goalkeeper watched at the screen for a few seconds, before putting his phone back in his pocket.

“So, what was it?” Philipp inquired, curious.

“Nothing, just an old alarm I had forgotten to delete.” Manuel shrugged. “And of course, I know I'm lucky to have you, Fips.”

These last words made Philipp's heart melt, but it also made him miss the mix of guilt, hope and excitement in Manuel's eyes. He kissed the goalkeeper, not noticing that his lover was actually plotting something...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)  
> By the way, I must admit I felt a little bad that Mesut's the one being pranked here, since he scored yesterday, but that part was already written.   
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter ^^


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> As always I want to thank everyone for the comments and kudos ^^ Hope you'll like this chapter :)

“So, I guess we should go to help the others take care of the last micros left.” Manuel said while gently caressing Philipp's back.

“You're guessing right. Though I must admit I would like to stay like this for a little longer.” Philipp confessed, his head resting on the chest of the goalkeeper. His lover was keeping him close, and the captain had a happy, contented smile on his face.

“I'm sure the others wouldn't be so impressed by you if they knew that their captain is such a cuddler. You would be a little less intimidating.” Manuel teased him gently, sounding less desperate than before, as if he had forgotten about the loss of his beloved Nutella, which was quite strange, but Philipp was too glad his lover had let it go to complain about it. 

“Maybe, but you like being the only one who knows about it, am I wrong? And you're just as much a cuddler as I am, so shut up.” Philipp retorted, amused.

“I can't deny that.” Manuel chuckled. Philipp was more than right, he enjoyed being the only one to which his lover revealed this more vulnerable side of himself. Manuel smiled fondly, but it didn't last for long, the smile quickly turning into a frown as he thought about something else. Philipp had his eyes closed, sighing contently as he leaned into Manuel, and so he didn't notice it.

The truth was that Manuel never had an alarm on his phone, but he had received a message, one he couldn't let Philipp know about, not without angering him at least. Manuel knew that what he was going to do was surely wrong, but he had no choice. He just couldn't let things stay the way they were. And this message was his only chance to fix everything.

“I love being with you, Philipp, but we should really join the others now. You don't want to give Bastian enough time to come up with an elaborate plan, do you?” Manuel pointed out.

Philipp got away from Manuel reluctantly. Right now, he really wished this could have been a peaceful week-end, with no pranks being involved, so he could have spent more time with Manuel. But he shook this idea away. This was supposed to be a team reunion, and so they were here to spend some time all together, no matter what happened. If he had simply wanted to spend time with Manuel, they would have stayed in Munich, just the two of them. And so it helped him to agree with his lover.

“You're right, we shouldn't lose too much time.” He answered, trying to hide the fact that he had had a really hard time convincing himself of that, even though Manuel surely already knew that. The goalkeeper knew him quite well, after all.

Manuel bit his lips, knowing that this had only been the easy part of his own plan. It would be much more difficult to get Philipp to agree to the second one.

“Speaking of time, I thought we would be more efficient if we split apart. You know I love spending time with you, Fips, but you have to admit, we're not always really...productive when we're alone. If we listened to ourselves, we would still be making out right now.” He argued. Truth be told, this surely applied to all the couples of the German NT. Except maybe for Bastian and Lukas, if coming up with pranks could be seen as being productive.

Philipp looked weirdly at him, obviously not liking this idea. His eyes narrowed, and he declared:

“So it's still about your Nutella, then? You still didn't forgive me even though I'm not guilty of anything to begin with?” He hissed. 

Manuel had first looked afraid at the mention of Nutella, but upon hearing the rest of Philipp's speech, he had calmed down. He knew how to deal with that, and Philipp wasn't suspecting what he really had in mind.

“Of course not, Philipp. I understood you had nothing to do with that, don't worry. It's just that I'm aware that catching Bastian and interrogating him and Lukas about what's happening within the team really counts for you, and so I want to help you to achieve it. And I'm convinced we'll be able to do that more quickly by going to different places. You know me, I wouldn't stay away from you if I didn't think it was for the best.” Manuel answered, staying calm, and it helped to make Philipp anger disappear too.

“Okay, I'm sorry I got carried away. But are you really sure going different ways while Bastian is trying to prank us is really such a good idea?” Philipp wondered, still not convinced.

“Come on, Fips, we're not in a horror movie, and Bastian isn't a monster or a serial killer. I'm sure it's going to be alright. I'll go help Thomas and Miroslav and you can help whoever you want.” Offered Manuel.

“Why them precisely?” Wanted to know Philipp, and this time, Manuel feared he would be discovered. But once more, he managed not to show it and replied:

“Well, I have to begin somewhere, right? And Thomas is my friend, after all.” 

“Alright, you can go help him if that's what you want, just try not to cause more trouble while you're with him.” Philipp sighed, knowing what those two could be capable of.

“Philipp, we wouldn't...” He intervened, but a look from his captain and lover stopped him.

“Don't finish that sentence. We both know the only reasons that Thomas isn't the biggest troublemaker of the team is just that Bastian and Lukas are better at this than he is, and that Miroslav is calming him down.” The captain pointed out, and Manuel couldn't really deny it.

“And where will you go, then?” Manuel asked him, knowing Philipp would get suspicious if he didn't want to know where his lover was going.

“With Toni and James. I mean, they're surely placed quite high on the list of people Bastian wants to prank.” He explained. But it only confused Manuel.

“Wait, so you're saying you're going there on purpose, knowing you're surely going to get pranked? I'm sorry, but I don't really understand the logic behind all that.” said Manuel, and Philipp forced himself not to roll his eyes. Wasn't it evident?

“Well, you see, if Bastian's going to prank them, then it means that Bastian is going to be there. And it also means that I'll have more chances of catching him.” Philipp exposed his plan.

“Maybe, but it's Bastian you're talking about. I don't think he'll let you catch him that easily.” Manuel tried to reason Philipp.

“We'll see about that. He's far from being the only clever person here. But as you just said, we do not have much time to lose. See you later then, Manuel.” Philipp replied, not forgetting to place a quick kiss on Manuel's lips before heading towards the hall were Toni and James were supposed to be.

Manuel wished him good luck, not believing that his lover had accepted so easily. He couldn't help but think about how much Philipp loved and trusted him, and for a second, he felt a tinge of remorse. Then he began walking towards his own destination, trying to ignore the doubts that were now slowly filling his mind.

 

Thomas and Miroslav were quite surprised when they recognized the person which was coming their way. But Miroslav was definitely glad he wasn't on Thomas' shoulders anymore, he didn't need more people to make fun of him because of his fear of heights. Knowing Lukas, he would surely hear enough about it already, he didn't need anyone to make it worse.

“Manuel, what are you doing here? And where is Philipp?” Thomas asked him. 

It was indeed usually quite rare to see one without the other. And Manuel even looked as if he had been crying; Thomas was Manuel friend, and he knew that not a lot of things could make the goalkeeper cry, so something important must have happened. Something was definitely going on, even if Thomas didn't know what it was yet. But he was determined to find out what it was. He was a curious man, and loved solving mysteries.

“We finished removing the micros in the living room, so Philipp sent me here.” He explained.

“Oh that's great! We finished here too, thanks to my Miro who was truly awesome!” Thomas exclaimed, and Miroslav had a hard time not sending him a dark look. He knew Thomas, and so he was aware that his lover really meant it and was really proud of him for fighting his fear. But he also knew his teamates would mostly see it as something quite ridiculous.

As if to prove his point, Lukas snickered in the background, even though the final sound was a little weird because of his gag. Manuel raised an eyebrow, not really understanding what was going on, but in the end he decided that it was none of his business anyway and so he chose not to dig this up any further.

“So, since we're done with the micros, I guess we should find the others and decide what do to next, right? I guess that's what you are here, Manuel.” Miroslav intervened.

“Well, not exactly. Philipp asked me to tell you that you can go help Mats and Benedikt next. But he also told me to bring Lukas back to him. Apparently, he wants to ask him questions about what is happening within the national team now.” Manuel told them.

“Earlier today, I would have told you that it wasn't a good idea, that Bastian and Lukas would take revenge on us for that during national duty, but I think they're going to do that anyway, so I don't see why we should hide it from Philipp anymore.” Thomas shrugged.

Manuel couldn't believe it was so easy. Things couldn't be that simple, right? But then Miroslav talked again, and Manuel gulped, fearing once more that his plan would be discovered.

“I don't understand why Philipp didn't do that earlier, instead of telling us to take Lukas with us.” Miroslav said.

“Because he couldn't interrogate him the way he wanted to, not with Bastian having micros everywhere. Now that we dealt with that, it's going to get much easier to get him to tell us everything we want.” Manuel explained, hoping his explanation would be enough to convince Miroslav. He knew quite well that Philipp's absence already made him look suspicious, so he had to be careful about what he said.

“Well, that makes sense.” Miroslav admitted, and Manuel felt some pressure leave his shoulders. But it was without counting on Thomas, who was still as curious as ever.

“You look as if you had been crying, Manuel. Did something happen?” He asked him, looking concerned. Manuel was his friend, after all.

For a second, Manuel couldn't help but wonder if Thomas actually knew about Nutella not being produced anymore or not. Maybe his friend had been hiding it from him all this time, just like he had thought Philipp had done...However, Manuel decided not to show how he felt. Maybe Thomas didn't know about it either. And if he wanted everything to turn out the way he wanted it to, he couldn't tell him the truth.

“Oh that? It's nothing, I just hit my foot against the corner of a wardrobe. Believe it or not, but that really hurts like hell.” He mumbled, knowing he would surely never hear the end of it, but he didn't have enough time to think of something else.

“Really? You cried just because you bumped into some piece of furniture?” Thomas chuckled.

“It really hurt, I swear! I wonder why I'm friend with you sometimes...” Manuel sighed, hoping this would be enough to distract Miroslav and Thomas so that they would let him leave with Lukas.

“Thomas, don't be rude.” Miroslav advised him, though it wasn't completely innocent. He thought that maybe if he helped Manuel right now, then the goalkeeper would intervene in his favor when the rest of the team would learn about his fear of height.

“Do you really have to be that serious all the time?” Thomas complained, but he did as his lover had told him, leaving Manuel alone.

“I think I'm going to go now. As I told Philipp, we can't let Bastian get too much advance on us, or else we're never going to beat him.” Manuel said once more. 

His teamates agreed, and Lukas reluctantly followed him, even though he did his best to walk as slowly as he could to annoy the goalkeeper. But it didn't manage to annoy Manuel who stayed calm, until they were far enough from Manuel and Thomas. Then, he took Lukas' gag off, letting him speak again.

“Bastian!” The troublemaker shouted immediately, but Manuel didn't try to stop him and just rolled his eyes.

“You don't have to do this. I'm going to give you back to him.” He announced, and Lukas looked at him with bewilderment.

“What? Really? I thought you were taking me to see Philipp?” He questioned him.

“That's what I told Miroslav and Thomas so that they would accept to let you come with me. Bastian and I have an...arrangement. He actually has something that I want. And all I need to do to get it is to bring you to him.” Manuel explained.

“And you don't think Philipp will be mad at you?” Lukas asked him. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to give Manuel reasons not to release him, but he was curious to know what was so important to the goalkeeper. Just like everyone else in the team, he knew just how much Manuel loved Philipp, and wondered what had convinced him to betray his lover.

“He'll surely be, but...I have to do this. But for now you're still my prisoner, and I don't want to talk about that with you. Be happy that you're going to be with your lover again and shut up.” The goalkeeper grunted.

Lukas had a hard time sticking to that and convincing himself not to annoy Manuel some more, but he didn't want the other man to change his mind. He was so close from being reunited with his Basti again, he couldn't wait! And then they would be able to make them teamates pay once and for all. H e already had a thousand ideas of pranks in mind, and he just couldn't wait to make them become reality. He would make sure the rest of the team would never forget it!

Manuel went back to the living room he had left a few minutes ago. Bastian and him had agreed on meeting there since the room had been empty after Philipp left it, and that their friends had no reasons of coming here. The goalkeeper had to wait for a few minutes, but finally, Bastian appeared. Manuel didn't even try to understand how the prankster had managed to get there without anyone else noticing him. Bastian and Lukas were used to do this kind of things, after all, so it really wasn't that surprising, he guessed.

“So you came after all. And me who was afraid you would be too faithful to our dear captain to do anything like this.” Bastian giggled. Manuel, however, looked quite serious, holding Lukas and not letting him join his lover.

“Whatever. You promised me something, and I won't give you Lukas back until you tell me where it is.” He warned him, not wanting to be fooled. He didn't do all this for nothing, after all.

“In the cupboards in my room. Though not all of it is there. I'll give you the rest once I have Lukas back.” Bastian said, expecting Manuel to let go of his lover but he didn't. Instead, he laughed, which didn't please the other man.

“What the hell are you laughing about?” Bastian growled.

“So you really believed I would do it? You really thought I would betray my Fips?” Manuel asked, even though he obviously wasn't waiting for an answer.

Bastian suddenly stopped looking as smug as before, and he turned around, only to find himself in front of Mesut and Sami, whose hair was still wet and who seemed to be really, really angry at him. He tried to run the other way, only to find himself face to face with Thomas and Miroslav. Then with Toni and James. Benedikt and Mats were next, and finally, Mario and Marco blocked the only left path he could have used to escape. Bastian took a step back, finally understanding that he was trapped.

It was this moment Philipp chose to enter the room, a devilish smile on his face, looking quite pleased with himself. He walked towards Bastian, staring at the prankster, before saying:

“Well, it looks like I beat you at your own game. Next time, you'll think about it twice before trying to convince my lover to do something against me.” He stopped talking, and then went to Manuel's side, kissing the goalkeeper lovingly. 

Lukas, who still couldn't get away, made a disgusted face at that, not wanting to be so close to them. But the two lovers didn't notice him. When they finally parted, Philipp murmured, though loud enough for all the others to hear:

“Thank you Manuel, you were so great.” Then he smirked. “Now we'll finally be able to give those two what they deserve.”

Even though they would have liked to look tough, Lukas and Bastian both shivered in fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! sorry for the wait, here's the new chapter, I hope you'll like it. And as always thank you for all your nice support :)

Bastian and Lukas were definitely less smug than before, now that their plan had failed. Bastian was looking apologetically at his lover, showing him silently that he was sorry for falling into Philipp's trap that easily, hoping he would forgive him for that. But there was no anger in Lukas' eyes, and he obviously didn't resent Bastian for not succeeding at pranking their friends without getting caught. He had already done more than well by not getting caught sooner, since everyone in the mansion had been looking for him. 

And he had managed to prank a few of them, after all. Even if that last point wasn't going to be in their favor right now, since almost all of their teamates had a reason to be mad at them- and the rest obviously found it funny to see them in such a complicated situation, which wasn't really better for them.

“Before you punish us, can you at least tell us how you managed to fool me? I mean, my plan was great, and I would like to know why it failed.” Bastian asked them. “I was going to trade a huge amount of Nutella in exchange for my Lukas. And knowing Manuel, it should have worked.”

For a moment, Philipp thought that telling him would be a bad idea, that it could help Lukas and him to improve their pranks in the future. But the temptation of boasting over his victory was too great, and so he decided not to listen to his reason, for once. That and the fact that he definitely wanted to show to everyone that he was more important to Manuel than his Nutella, damnit!

“Well, it looks like you don't know Manuel as well as you thought you did, because he told me everything right away. In fact, he just waited until we weren't in the same room anymore to send me messages through our phones so that you wouldn't suspect anything. We couldn't be sure that all of your micros had been removed, after all. And Manuel definitely cares more about me than about that Nutella you tried to corrupt him with.” Philipp declared proudly, smiling at his lover.

For a moment, Manuel almost corrected Philipp, wanting to tell him that, truth be told, things didn't exactly happen like that. After discovering that Nutella was gone forever, he had deeply regretted not being able to buy as much of it as he could before it was too late, and had begun mourning over it.

And then he had received Bastian's message, the prankster telling him that he actually owned a lot of Nutella, which gave the goalkeeper a chance to fix that mistake. Apparently, Bastian and Lukas had a huge stock of it because they knew they could always use Nutella to prank him, but Manuel didn't care about that. What he really cared about was that he could get some Nutella back. All he had to do was to bring Lukas back to Bastian.

And at first, he had been ready to do just that. But he wasn't stupid, and it wouldn't have been the first time that his two teamates pranked him. And so he had decided to be more prudent, for once. Maybe dating the captain of his team had that kind of influence on him.

After all, nothing assured him that Bastian would really give him his Nutella once Lukas would be with him again. But if he did that, Manuel was sure to bring his Fips' wrath upon himself. And ending up without Nutella and with an angry Philipp who would hardly forgive him didn't sound like a very good plan to him.

And the fact that his Fips had been making out with him when he received that message, acting all cuddly, had also made him feel guilty about the idea of doing something behind his back. Furthermore, he had considered that if he told Philipp everything and helped him to catch Bastian by doing so, then he could always pressure the two prankster into telling him where the Nutella was afterward. 

And even if this plan had flaws, he had considered that it was definitely a better one than only trusting blindly the two pranksters. But of course, Philipp didn't need to know that he had considered both options, right? So Manuel wisely decided to stay silent, and smiled back at his lover.

“I don't understand. Why would you think that Manuel would betray Philipp only for some Nutella? He's quite fond of that chocolate paste, I got it, but if he wants some of it, he only have to go and buy some, no? It's definitely not worth doing something against your lover.” James commented, confused, even if all in all, he was definitely glad that they had caught the two pranksters once and for all, and that punishment was finally coming for them.

“You mean you don't know?” Manuel asked him, obviously shocked.

“I don't know what?” The young Colombian repeated, not understanding what was going on. But the sadness on Manuel's face told him that it had to be something big.

“That there will be no more Nutella! It had stopped being produced. That's why Bastian thought it would be enough to get me to turn my back on Fips. But he was wrong, even if it hurt me to push that Nutella aside.” He explained once more, maybe acting a little more dramatically than necessary. 

Of course he would try to get the Nutella back, but for now, the wisest thing to do was to make sure that Philipp didn't notice that he had been quite close from really accepting Bastian's offer. And maybe his lover would reward him for resisting to the temptation of the Nutella if he believed that.

“No more Nutella? Are you sure of that?” The younger man asked once more, frowning. The chocolate paste was so popular that he was almost sure that he would have heard about it not being produced anymore, one way or another. This was becoming more and more suspicious. And contrary to Manuel, James didn't care that much about Nutella, which allowed him to see that something was definitely weird in this story

“Unfortunately yes. Philipp and I heard it on the radio.” Manuel revealed, and once more, he felt sad upon evoking the loss of the chocolate paste, and it wasn't only due to the fact that he wanted his lover to feel sorry for him. Instead of what, Philipp rolled his eyes. Not being able to eat Nutella couldn't be that bad, right? The captain was sure that sooner or later, his lover would see that healthy food was way better for him anyway.

“Not that I doubt your words, Manuel, but I'm still going to check that.” James told him, pulling his phone out from his pocket, using it to go to the internet. He scrolled through pages for a few minutes, making some researches, before he finally announced:

“There's nothing about Nutella not being produced anymore. But since someone's goal was to prank us all, I think I can guess who it was who made you believe that.”

As he said that, he stared at Bastian, and once more the prankster wished that he could just disappear. He knew that Manuel would be far from happy to discover that he had been fooled by them once more. Maybe not as much as if he had indeed given Lukas back to him, but still. Bastian had actually planned on being far away from him when the goalkeeper would learn that it had only been a lie. But he hadn't been so lucky.

“You mean that Nutella still exists? I can still buy as much as I want?” Manuel exclaimed, looking like a child opening his Christmas gifts. As for Philipp, he didn't look so happy, silently saying goodbye to his dreams of finally being able to make Manuel eat healthy food.

“Yes, I'm pretty sure it was only a prank Bastian pulled out on you. Not that it is that surprising, you should have checked it earlier. I mean, it was obvious that he would try to put things to his advantage.” James reasoned, but Manuel didn't listen to the end of his speech, only paying attention to the information that really mattered to him: He would still be able to get Nutella in the future!

“Oh mein gott, it's so great! Thank you so much for finding that out! Nutella is saved!” Manuel almost shouted, hugging James tightly, to the point where the Real Madrid player could hardly breathe. 

Lukas took advantage of the distraction it provided to congratulate Bastian for pranking Manuel into believing that his beloved had disappeared. Maybe they had been caught, but that was just too funny. He only wished he had been there to see Manuel's reaction when he had learned the news.

Toni coughed. When Manuel didn't react, he did it again. Then he did it a third time. And finally, he let out in a growl, anger in his voice:

“Manuel, would you please let go of my boyfriend?” 

Even if he knew that Manuel only reacted like that because of his Nutella, it didn't change the fact that Toni could be quite possessive of James sometimes, and didn't really like the idea of his little Colombian being hugged by other men. He already had to witness this kind of things during goal celebrations, and to him it was already more than enough.

“I'm with Toni on that. Manu, let go of the kid.” Philipp ordered him, sounding jealous as well, and ready to intervene if the goalkeeper didn't obey him. 

But Manuel released James immediately, so there was no need for that. He faced his lover, who had crossed his arms and now had a stern look on his face. James was definitely thankful towards both his lover and the ex-captain of Die Mannschaft, since he was able to breathe again.

“Come on, Fips, you need to chill out. I just showed you how much how I loved you by not going along with Bastian's plan, even though he was offering me Nutella, and you're still being jealous? You should know by now that I would never leave you for anyone else. No one matters more to me than you” Manuel laughed, smiling tenderly at his Fips once more.

“Maybe, but that doesn't mean that I like to see you hugging other people. Not to mention the fact that Toni wasn't so happy about it either, so my reaction was only natural. Now, you should help me find a good enough punishment for Lukas and Bastian, at least that would be productive.” He told him, and the two pranksters, who had hoped for a moment that their captain had forgotten about them, looked at each other, trying to find a desperate escape plan, but they had to see the truth, they had absolutely no way of getting out of this. 

“I admit that it's going to be hard to be as inventive as them.” Miroslav had to recognize, but his lover didn't agree with that.

“Come on Miro, I'm sure that we can find something even better than everything they came up with! After all they put us through, that's the least we can do!” Thomas exclaimed, and the older man chuckled. He knew that contrary to Fips or other members of the team, Thomas didn't care so much about getting his revenge, his only goal being to have fun at the expanse of the two pranksters. And if that wasn't utterly adorable, then he didn't know what was.

“I guess this is useless, but are you sure we can't make a deal? Manuel, are you sure you don't want some more Nutella? You don't realize just how important the stocks we have are!” Bastian tried to convince him, and if the goalkeeper seemed to hesitate for a mere second, the look on Philipp's face quickly made him change his mind. Their captain would have his revenge, and he was smart enough not to get in his way. And he knew some of their teamates definitely resented the two pranksters as well. He wasn't enough of a fool to change sides now.

“You're not helping your case by trying to corrupt my boyfriend once more, you know? If I were you, I'd try to be as quiet as possible while we discuss this all together.” Philipp warned them, before he began whispering again with the rest of the team, trying to find the best idea while making sure that the two pranksters wouldn't hear them.

“Wait, so you mean that you caught me without even having a plan of what you were going to do with me and Lukas next?” Bastian exclaimed, not hiding how vexed he was by that idea.

“We would never do something like that!” Lukas agreed. “You're supposed to have everything planned out while pranking other people. I can't believe we've been trapped by such amateurs...Especially after that Basti managed to make Manuel believe that Nutella was gone forever, which was truly a genius idea. So much work put to waste....” He grumbled.

“You can say whatever you want, but it won't change the fact that the hardest part of this was catching you both. Now that we managed to do that, we have all our time to decide how to punish you. So as Philipp already said, you'd better stay quiet. We already have enough reasons to be mad at you, so you'd be clever not to give us another one.” Mats warned them, since he had been among the ones who really wanted to punish the two pranksters, because he wouldn't allow anyone to ruin his time with his Benni without facing some consequences.

“Mats is right. After what you just put me and Mesut through, you shouldn't annoy us even more, or it could end badly for you.” Sami agreed, and the duo gulped again, feeling less and less safe.

“Thomas, Miroslav, you sure you don't want to help us? We'll teach you how to do pranks as good as ours, and I'll promise I'll never tell anyone what I witnessed while you were removing the micros!” Lukas offered them in a desperate attempt, but the way their two teamates burst out laughing showed them that all hope was gone for them.

“First, Thom and I can come with good pranks anytime, we don't need your help. Second, I have no idea of what you're talking about, Thomas and I removed those micros without any problem. And third, do you really think I would risk bringing down the wrath of all the team on me and Thomas just to help you? I'm sorry, but this time, you're on your own, and you'll finally have to face the consequences of your acts.” Miroslav declared.

This time, Lukas and Bastian lowered their heads, finally understanding that they wouldn't manage to bargain their way out of this. They could only pray that the rest of the team wouldn't be too imaginative and wouldn't come out with a too harsh punishment.

“I can't believe you're still acting like children.” Philipp sighed, but then he stopped at his own words, a smirk appearing on his face, and it was enough for the two pranksters to know that they were screwed. “I have an idea. Since you seem determined on acting like children, as I just said, then you should also be treated as such.” 

“Which means...?” Bastian wondered, not sure if he wanted to know the answer or not. Especially when Philipp was looking at them like that. He had the feeling that they would finally pay for bringing even more trouble within Die Mannschaft after his retirement. 

“That you're going to be grounded. Well, first you won't get any dinner. And you'll be locked in your room so you'll have time to think about what you've done.” Their former captain announced. 

Bastian and Lukas looked at each other, surprised and relieved. It could have been much worse, at least they would still be togeth... “And of course you'll be separated, there's enough room here for that.” Philipp finished, putting an end to their hopes.

“No, you can't do that! Let me be with my Basti, I want to stay with him! ” Lukas protested, hugging his lover, determined not to let go of him. Discreetly, Thomas took his phone out, ready to take pictures because he had the feeling things were about to get interesting, and he wanted to immortalize all of it.

“If we let you stay together, it wouldn't be a real punishment, and you know that.” Argued Marco. “And if I recall well, you felt no remorse while ruining my time with Mario, even though you know I don't get to see him that often. And you weren't any kinder to the other couples of the team. So I think that you definitely deserve this.”

“We shouldn't make fools of ourselves, Luks, this is obviously a lost battle.” Bastian accepted their fates, caressing Lukas' back to comfort him. But he also murmured in his lover's ear: “But don't worry, when we'll be back with the national team, we'll make them pay ten times for that. For example, we'll see how Manuel will act once I'll confiscate all of his Nutella. Don't forget who's captain now.”

Lukas nodded, but Bastian's promises didn't change anything from the fact that right now, they were trapped, and would surely spend the night all alone, locked away in their bedroom. And he didn't like that idea.

“I don't care, I'm not letting you go. Not when I've just been reunited with you.” Lukas replied, stubborn, holding Bastian even more tightly. This time, it was loud enough for the other to hear them, and so Philipp intervened once more.

“Since you apparently didn't understand it the first time, let me make things clear: you don't really have a choice in the matter. So you can either do as you're told and go to those bedrooms willingly, or we'll have to force you to do so.”

It turned out that Philipp's threats weren't enough to make Lukas change his mind. So the smaller man looked at the rest of his teamates, who nodded, understanding what they had to do, before they grabbed the two troublemakers, and in the end, Lukas was forced to let go of Bastian as he was dragged towards one of the bedrooms. Even if Philipp had retired and officially wasn't the captain of Die Mannschaft anymore, they still instinctively obeyed him whenever he gave them orders.

As for Thomas, he had stayed behind, not being one of the people carrying the pranksters against their will. Instead, he was busy taking pictures, knowing it would be a useful weapon which would allow him to blackmail the two troublemakers later on. He was almost sure that they wouldn't want other people to see the embarrassing situation in which they were right now.

Finally, Philipp locked the doors of the two bedrooms from the outside, insensible to the last pleads of Lukas and Bastian, looking quite proud of himself for finally making them pay once and for all. As he was busy doing that, James and Toni got closer to Miroslav and Thomas.

“If you two want to sneak away to get that romantic dinner you were talking about earlier, I think you should do it now, while Philipp is still busy with Bastian and Lukas. If you don't, he will surely invoke the 'team gathering spirit' to force you to stay here.” Toni predicted.

The two lovers thanked them quickly, leaving before Philipp realized anything, glad that fate was finally smiling to them- And Thomas just couldn't wait to show to his Miro these pictures he had taken of Bastian and Lukas, he was sure he would have a good laugh with that. 

“So, now that the problems have been solved” From the inside of his room, Lukas shouted that they were not problems but human beings, and that they had rights, but the sound was muffled by the door, and so his teamates barely heard him “I think we can go back to what we were supposed to do, that is to say have a nice week-end all together.” Philipp declared, ignoring on purpose the fact that “all together” now excluded Bastian and Lukas.

“I don't know about you, but hunting these two made me hungry. I'm going to fetch some Nutella.” Manuel decided, but his lover stopped him.

“No, you won't. It's time to eat, so we're all going to go to the dining room and have dinner together, as a team. Except that this time, Lukas and Bastian won't be here to make things go out of control. And no, you won't eat Nutella before, or else you won't be hungry anymore.” Philipp pointed out, before sighing: “I swear you're all children sometimes.”

“But I helped you catch Lukas and Bastian!” Manuel whined.

“No is no, Manu.” The smaller man let out. “But don't worry, I'll definitely find other ways to reward you.” He promised, lowering his voice, and it was enough to stop his lover from complaining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :D

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading :)


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